Advice to Bingers #1

I see a lot of posts about binging.

I have successfully recovered from binge eating, and bulimia, too. I figured I would share some advice, as I'm going to school to be an integrative nutritionist and me and my fiance are going to open a wellness center in a couple of years to help others, simply because I always told myself that if I helped myself, it would be my duty to help others.

I know the disgust, the shame, the self-hatred, and the depression that comes from binging. Truth is, these feelings in and of themselves are addictive in that we get so used to feeling them, feeling 'good' doesn't really feel comfortable.

The first piece of advice I have for you all is this: It's not always a binge. Don't classify overdoing it at dinner or eating till you're stuffed at the breakfast buffet as a binge when it is not! Keep this in mind:

'Normal' eaters both over-eat and under-eat on occasion. That comes with being human. You're not EVER going to completely rid yourself of what you consider a 'binge.' What you CAN do is loosen your definition of a 'binge.' I look at binges as what happens after I've overdone it a little at dinner, and I think 'screw it, I'm going to eat until I fall into an insulin coma.' I classify 'binges' as eating to avoid something, or eating to numb myself. Sometimes, I eat as much as I would on a binge, but it wasn't for emotional reasons.

The trick is, you really have to get to know yourself and your emotions so you can trully identify a binge. Otherwise, you might be eating for emotional reasons, but you don't know yourself well enough to know that that is what's going on.

I will write another piece of advice in a couple days; I hope this helps some people! Binge eating is a dark place to be in.

Good luck everyone, and go easy on yourselves! Work WITH yourselves, not against yourselves!

thank you, shakti for your wonderful advice. I was in a lot of stress for a month and gained 20 pounds from binging (It's binging of course) and now that I've gotten over it, I realized that my body's has gotten used to the binging that it is so hard to stop...I really want to lose that weight but find myself slipping back to eating unhealthy foods and going over the caloric limit. I will, however, find the balance so I can lose that weight again.

This is terrific advice! Thank you for posting it.

A few years ago, I went in to see my chiropractor. She took one look at me and my fifteen pound weight gain and asked what had happened.

"Chocolate Moose Track ice-cream," I said.

She continued to grill me, insistent that I must be eating to hide some emotional state. I kept insisting that the ice cream tasted SO good and I hadn't had ice cream in years that I just kept eating and eating... and here I was. (I ate something like a litre a day for a week. It was insane.)

For what it's worth, it's still REALLY good. It's my cat nip. I just don't buy it any more. It wasn't a binge, however, just excessive eating.

Truly, truly pleasurable experience though...

Thanks for the replies!

You know, I feel I should clarify something:

Why is it helpful to loosen your definition of a 'binge'?

The main reason is the fact that binges tend to breed other binges. If you binged today, it is likely you will binge tonight because today has become a 'binge day.' The next morning, you will have that hot, full feeling, which will remind you of how you binged the previous night, which will likely lead to another morning binge. And so goes the cycle.

If you don't classify it as a 'binge,' you can still get away with feeling relatively good about yourself that night or the next day, which will likely result in better choices food-wise. One binge never made anybody fat. Keep that in mind!

I read these 2 articles today about bingeing and not allowing it to undo all your hard work - thought I would share them:

Article 1
Article 2

Very informative and helpful!!

willowraven, I've heard of Geneen Roth and have actually read all of her books...she's a guest teacher and speaker at the Institute of Integrative Nutrition of New York that I'm going to.

I think she's a great step in the right direction, but her method is not necessarily the end; at least not for everyone. I found her books to be repetative and more about her reliving her past pain and frustration over and over rather than moving forward. In short, reading one of her books is enough; after that it's the same recycled material.

The best book of hers is called 'why weight?' It is full of thought provoking questions that help you get to the root of your emotional eating issues. It's a workbook, available at most book stores. I reccomend that to everyone!

Both articles are pretty cool, though. And as I said, Roth is a visionary in this field, so I'm not trying to get down on her personally, I just find her work to be...a little under-evolved.

I had actually read a few of Ms. Roth's books several years ago, before the birth of my 3rd child and about 100 pounds ago, and it's what made me realize that I had a bingeing problem, and not some freak of nature.  It helped me come to some terms with my eating problem and helped me seek help.  While yes, there are times she does go over things time and time again, I found her books very informative and easy to read/follow.  They weren't filled with technical jargon that I have a hard time grasping - they were down to earth and had stories that I could relate to.  Unfortunately, for many who have a bingeing disorder, having to deal with the past is part of the healing process and overcoming it.  For me, working through issues surrounding emotional, verbal and psychological abuse is what is slowly helping me get through and beyond the bingeing.  I can't do that if I don't revisit my past, and that's a point she tries to make.  In order to head into the future, you need to work out your hang-ups in the past so they don't continue to hang you up.  You can't keep burying your past with the food - eventually you need to face it.

Not sure if you are aware, Ms. Roth also writes articles for Prevention magazine as well as continuing her books and heading up different groups for emotional eating and bingeing.  I wonder how much further and deeper into the abyss I'd be if I hadn't stumbled upon her books on day in the library.  I envy your opportunity to see and hear her speak at the Institute you are attending.  You'll have to let me know how it goes!!  I'll be interested in hearing.

Yeah I'm really looking forward to meeting her in person! I am actually a fan of her books, and I do agree that we must delve into the past to help solve the issues in the now, but I think she delves too much into HER past in the books, and hasn't seemed to have moved past 'victim mode' in her life yet. Then again, I don't know her personally.

I heard she wrote for prevention, but I haven't really looked at any of the articles (for body image reasons, I'm on an indefinite 'magazine diet'...)

She kind of ripped off Hirchmann and Munter where the 'non-diet philosophy' is concerned, but she kind of made the philosophy more accessible and doable for the average person.

If you like Roth, I'd reccomend taking a look at her predecessors; especially their book 'When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies' and 'Overcoming Overeating.'

Out of curiousity, how did Roth's nondiet approach work for you?

Heeey, pagain!

Happy belated Yule!

I also like "Eating By the Light of the Moon". Very cool book. Thanks for the advice on binge eating, I agree that binging only begets further binging, but it can be a challenge to maintain that persepctive when you feel so stuck in it.

Out of curiousity, how did Roth's nondiet approach work for you?


Actually, overall it works quite well.  When I think of it as a "diet" I end up feeling that, if I make a mistake or have a binge, then it's all over, and I am a failure.  By not thinking of it as a "diet", and just as a way of living, and a lifestyle choice, I have been able to stay on it and not feel that I mess up=the end.  I try to learn from my mistakes so that I don't repeat them (not always successful, but I keep trying!).  I also had 3 years of counselling that dealt mostly with the bingeing and the issues that triggers my worst episodes and I went from daily binges to having them only a couple times a month, so for me, that's progress.

I would actually like to find & read her books again (hello local library!) as it's been quite a few years since I read them -- see if there is anything new/additional I can get out of them since I am a bit further on my weight loss journey than I was then.  

And happy (belated) Yule to you!  Did you do anything special for the sabbat?  We had a small get-together with some family and friends with sabbat foods and a Yule story, and burned some candles to 'encourage' the return of the Sun.  It was very nice, actually.  Hadn't been able to do that the last couple of years.  We had a nice time!

wrkit, I'll have to look for the book.  Interesting title too!  Is it about binge eating, or another aspect of eating/dieting, or...?

You know, unfortunately I wasn't invited to anything for Yule this year and I didn't have my own Yule celebration, so I ended up just celebrating Christmas with family (who, by the way, are not even Christian, so...). Last year,  my bellydance teacher has a big bonfire at her house, and we did Eastern European Circle dances and sang and brought the light of the bonfire into the house via candles. It was very nice, and I wish we could have done it again this year. There's always next year, right?

The two books I reccomended to you are almost exactly like Roth's books, but you can tell they are the originators of the ideas. They're a little more extreme than Roth, however, and I don't necessarily think their method would work for me or for most bingers. I did get a lot out of the books, however, philisophically and what not, I just wouldn't reccomend following their method to a T.

wrkit, I'm interested, too...what's the book you reccomended about? It sounds real interesting?

so true! eating one biscuit is like a binge to me!!!!!!!

I knew there was more than one good, no great reason I found this site only just last week! I lost close to 30lbs over the last few years, well it yo-yoed all the time until this last year or so, I have had trouble with binge eating all my adult life (now 35) but never talked about it (til this year to my phyc. but I think he just thought I was lying because I was what most would call quite thin) or even read about it, I felt shameful, and thought I was stupid for feeling that way because I have always stayed thinner than my mom and aunt (small family, both 300lbs., hate their weight and have made me feel guilty about it from time to time). Wow...yea, the cycle of eat allot, then say "screw it I may as well eat more junk while it's here and get it all out of the house and enjoy it while I can" or whatever rationalization, then even eating into the middle of the night! The next morning I will still get up and eat cup cakes smeared with extra icing, gross, but I love it.. at the time. Hate myself later. When I've been REALLY stuck, it lasts weeks or more and gets stuck on, right? 20 or 30 lbs. worth. Now I am medicated for bipolar and I can seem to keep a more firm grasp on my will power for some reason, but I was glad to read that first post and see a bit of a realistic (was that a professional?) description, it made sense to me. Just yesterday was a birthday here, huge b-bq hamburgers and fries, I made sloppy lasagna the night before and had it for lunch again, those cup-cakes I mentioned with cherry choc. ice-cream, then half a box of chocolates (well that means about 6) then more cup cake for breakfast!, But I did run yesterday, 5k. I will try to be good for the rest of the day, I want to throw the chocolates away, would that be good or bad for my brain? Should I just keep them and try to be disciplined? I could give them to my kids for treats, but I actually viciously protect my kids from too much sugar as a rule, weird eh?

wow this is amazing advice!!

Im going to post this on a thread i started.

thanks!!!!!

interesting stuff!