What age for sex, emotions, relations education!

I don't have much of a view on this as I don't have kids, but the debate is going on to make it compulsory to be taught in the schools from the age of 5yrs old.

What are your views?

Do you think it should be taught in schools at this age?

Do you think it should be down to the parents?

If you don't agree with it being taught at such a young age what age do you think it should start?

I do think it should be taught in schools beginning at a young age.  Kids need to know what kind of touching is okay and not okay at a young age.  They need to know that if they are being touched the wrong way that it's okay to tell an adult and to not fear being hurt because of it.  There also needs to be stanards on how teachers answer certain questions.  You know, "those" questions.

Can't rely on parents to do things like that.  Many do teach their children, but others do not.

The correct age to begin is as soon as the child starts to ask questions or show interest. For example: a 3 yr old boy may ask why his body is different than mommy. Mommy should tell them that boys have a penis and girls have a vagina. That he is a boy and daddy is a boy and they both have a penis. The 3 yr old will probably say OK and go back to playing.

Should anything be taught in schools? Yes and once again it should be age appropriate. You're not going to show a 6 yr old in 1st grade graphic illustrations and explain to them about menstruation and ejaculation. That's absurd. I think a health class that accurately describes body functions in a scientifc manner that is catered to the child's age and understanding is appropriate and would be beneficial to everyone.

I'm convinced that very few parents actually teach their children about sex and emotions.

Original Post by moonikins:

The correct age to begin is as soon as the child starts to ask questions or show interest. For example: a 3 yr old boy may ask why his body is different than mommy. Mommy should tell them that boys have a penis and girls have a vagina. That he is a boy and daddy is a boy and they both have a penis. The 3 yr old will probably say OK and go back to playing.

Should anything be taught in schools? Yes and once again it should be age appropriate. You're not going to show a 6 yr old in 1st grade graphic illustrations and explain to them about menstruation and ejaculation. That's absurd. I think a health class that accurately describes body functions in a scientifc manner that is catered to the child's age and understanding is appropriate and would be beneficial to everyone.

I'm convinced that very few parents actually teach their children about sex and emotions.

I agree.

My parents never taught me anything about sex and emotions.  Heck, going by the little information I got by them, I'd still be thinking that two people simply sharing a bed would lead to babies.

I think it's important to start teaching kids at a young age instead of avoiding the question; as long as the education is kept age-appropriate, I don't see a problem.

Yes, teach them!  I'm all for it, but for pete's sake, make it age apropriate!

My problem is who gets to decide what is age apropriate?  I bet we could sit down all day and argue the specifics and still nothing would be decided.  That's what worries me.

peaches: yeah that's what I was thinking, and also just because one 5yr old is ready doesn't mean the one next to them is.

Also what about religious schools? many religions are against things like contraception, so do those kids miss out or are the schools forced to teach something they are against?

I am the mom of a kindergartener...so I am at the heart of this right now.  I am all for age-appropriate sex education.  I think that a general overview of "private places", correct and incorrect touching and strangers is just about right for this group.  My kid knows more than this thanks to lots of questions about his new baby cousin, but we took the parent role and told him what we felt he could understand.  But...alot of parents don't take the time to inform their kids about anything, let alone to respect their bodies and those of others that something has to be done.

 

But...as a side note, my husband is adamently against sex ed taught in school...so there is still a lot of debate left, even in this household.

I knew about sex since I was 4 and told my whole kindergarden class how babies were made. (Made dad is an artist. We had some pretty crazy stuff on our walls...)

Anyway, I think that honesty and education is the best. It allowed me to make appropriate decisions with my body and as a result I haven't regreted anything I have done.

I especially think it's important to teach them about inapproriate touching at the younger ages as saintlymama suggested. There is a point when you're going into too much detail at some of the younger ages and it's just confusing and upseting for children so young.

I also think there should be more emphasis on emotions. That was something my mother impressed upon me. That when you enter a sexual relationship, you are bonding emotionally in a way that you won't understand until after the fact and that you don't want to create that bond with everyone you meet or you opne yourself up to a lot of pain. (At least, in my case, this was true. But my mum knew me and knew that I would sensitive to it.) I feel like this society still hasn't gotten over repression and free love and that there is a good compromise in between.

But in my high school sex ed classes we were taught outright lies, and I've met many people from this state who don't h ave a basic clue about sex (including my fiance when we first started dating.) It's really disappointing so I'm a big advocate for education.

Original Post by andie-joe:

peaches: yeah that's what I was thinking, and also just because one 5yr old is ready doesn't mean the one next to them is.

Also what about religious schools? many religions are against things like contraception, so do those kids miss out or are the schools forced to teach something they are against?

"Religious schools" are private or they aren't religious schools and therefore can teach whatever they want to or don't want to.

Currently children can be exempted from sex education in the state of Georgia with a wavier from the parents. This deals with the particular religions of the students. I personally disagree with this, but I can understand why it's implimented. If only those parents who waived their kids actually taught them something.... =/

You can make sex education appropriate for each age group. For little kids, they need to be taught about inappropriate touching and to tell a trusted adult if this happens (even if the person doing the touching is the parent). For older kids, they need to be taught about safe sex and the implications of having sex at a young age. When I was in fifth grade we started studying sex ed. The parents had to sign a form saying it was ok. I remember there were only one or two kids whose parents refused to sign the form. If there is parental consent I really don't see what the problem is. In elementary school the focus was more on our bodies. In junior high it was more focused on sex and that we could get pregnant, etc and how to avoid those things. And in high school it turned into watching slide after disgusting slide of various vag/penis that was insanely infected with some sort of STD. Then we had to watch a video of a woman giving birth. I know it doesn't work for all kids but that stuff scared the **** out of me and I held off on the sex until I knew I was ready.

I do think there needs to be some focus on the emotions that come about with sex. I like that we had sex ed in school. It was nothing my parents ever discussed with me. My mom said "if you want to start having sex at least tell me so I can get you on birth control". She knew if I was going to do it I wasn't going to listen to her to stop so she at least wanted me to be safe. Granted, I waited til age was a non-issue in terms of birth control. And my dad just told me "If you're on a date and the guy tries to pull some stuff and you don't like it, grab his balls and pull 'em towards you as hard as you can. I guarantee he'll leave you alone." haha

Original Post by alibsam:

And my dad just told me "If you're on a date and the guy tries to pull some stuff and you don't like it, grab his balls and pull 'em towards you as hard as you can. I guarantee he'll leave you alone." haha

lmao this made me chuckle.  That is some awesome Father-Daughter sex ed. :)

My, then four year-old, son was watching a pre-school TV programme (Tweenies) one day when they showed a lamb being born.  He found it absolutely fascinating!  And although I hadn't quite intended to have a sex-ed chat so early, the resulting question and answer session rather took on a life of its own.   My conclusion was that, aged four and being totally unselfconscious about bodily functions anyway,  he was probably a better pupil than some giggling teenager.

 

Ew!  You people actually want to talk about these messy things with children?

They're better off not knowing! :D

You've clearly never potty-trained a child....   Talking about 'messy' things is a basic requirement if you're a parent, whether you like it or not.   You can't choose what they ask you about.  You can, however, choose to answer truthfully or tell them a lie.

Original Post by gi-jane:

You've clearly never potty-trained a child....   Talking about 'messy' things is a basic requirement if you're a parent, whether you like it or not.   You can't choose what they ask you about.  You can, however, choose to answer truthfully or tell them a lie.

 ...or tell them: "Why would you ask about such a thing?  Go to your room, you bad kid!"

That's where a lot of parents get bogged down. Tell my kids the truth or a "little white lie cuz they're so young". It's much better to tell the plain simple truth. Kids in the 3-6 yr range ask many questions. They don't want detailed answers. They can sense when their parents are uncomfortable and not telling the truth.

If you don't answer your children truthfully at this age, you are in essence teaching them to lie.

Feeling kind of ornery today aren't you dnrothx?

Original Post by moonikins:

Feeling kind of ornery today aren't you dnrothx?

 Definitely not ornery.  It's more of an unfettered kind of feeling. :D

In actuality, I'm all for the Addams Family style of sex education...as evidenced in that scene with Wednesday getting her ear talked off by that kid blabbing about the stork.

Original Post by andie-joe:

I don't have much of a view on this as I don't have kids, but the debate is going on to make it compulsory to be taught in the schools from the age of 5yrs old.

What are your views?

Do you think it should be taught in schools at this age?

Do you think it should be down to the parents?

If you don't agree with it being taught at such a young age what age do you think it should start?

I think what they're actually talking about, at least here in the states, is teaching small children the difference between proper and improper touching, and how to recognize and what to do if an adult tries to take advantage of them in that way. I'm all for anything that enables children to protect themselves. What kind of adult would be against that?
Oh wait, I know what kind of adult. Forget I asked.

The more knowledge a kid is armed with the more power a kid has. Age appropriate education is important and neccessary.

Don't care if the schools teach it, although as a parent I would have wanted to look at the material, so I could help explain it within the framework of our personal belief system.

 

Original Post by kathygator:

The more knowledge a kid is armed with the more power a kid has. Age appropriate education is important and neccessary.

Don't care if the schools teach it, although as a parent I would have wanted to look at the material, so I could help explain it within the framework of our personal belief system.

 I prefer the two-pronged approach of school and parents both teaching the kid, even if it means they don't necessarily coincide content-wise. :D