Ashamed to go to the gym

Hello all,

I've had a history of binge eating and restriction and all that good stuff and am amazing at gaining weight. I've gained 10 pounds in the last two weeks! I'm up to 200 pounds and I feel miserable (I'm 5'6" and in college). I need to start exercising but I'm terrified of going to the gym. Having to put on exercise clothes and walking there is only the beginning. I'm probably going to be able to go for 10 minutes max.

Any advice?

Whenever you think of food, try to occupy yourself with something active.

Yoga, for example, is relaxing and very toning at the same time. Or, if that doesn't work, drink water or chew on gum instead of eating.

And as for the afraid to go to the gym part - try not to care what other people think and just do it for you. You'll feel much better. Hope I helped.

Well the journey starts w one step! SO, even if u do go for 10 min max , that is okay- you have to start somewhere, and that is great. Dress  comfy and go for it- you are doing this for yourself, not the others there. Take care of you because you do deserve it. Check out flylady.com - she talks about fly  - ing- fly is finally loving yourself- I got her body clutter book-- it is GREAT and very helpful-- makes me think of why I am eating what I am eating-- take care!

 

I know a lot of people feel this way, especially in the beginning. But the truth is, no one is watching you, really. People don't care how much you do or what you do ... and in fact are not tracking you at all. You could walk in, lift a couple weights, and leave, and no one would care or notice.

That's the reality that I've found. So don't worry about it!

However, that said, I've found myself more comfortable working out at home or with a running partner. 

I totally understand how u feel.  my sister gave me a few good hints:  #1-buy really cute workout clothes-that U look good in!!

It makes a difference! A lot of workout clothes make us look a lot slmmer than regular clothes...try them on and see what u like.  Get just two pairs and alternate them.

#2 Going with a friend helps big time!  A lot of gyms have free aerobic classes and other group workout classes...going for those will really help u get motivated...cuz its a group thing...and everyone is facing one way...so u can be in the back and still reap the benefits...also u could meet a friend that could be a potential buddy!

#3 Most gyms will have a trainer session for free also. They may first want to take ur measurements and all...just tell them to skip it and that u just want them to show u a few wt lifting/toning exercises to tone ur butt, arms, abdomen, thighs...etc. They basically have to do it...but skip all other things and go to that...

and then do circuit exercises...do like 5 min on the treadmill, 1 rep of arm exercises (which willhelp u catch ur breath) then 5 min on the elliptical, 1 rep for ur abdomen, and stop......I'm telling u, go slow and easy.  The first couple times are the hardest to work up ur ego to go....but if u just think that this is going to help u look better and stay fitter...then think abt what u r going to do first...it'll be a lot easier...i'm sure. let me know how it goes!

First off, I totally agress with most of the other posts on here, get some fun stuff to wear to the gym (and good shoes that fit right and have support -- this is VERY VERY important!!!!!) and find a gym buddy!
Most importantly, realize that you're sexy no mater what the scale says. Get out there! Hold your head up high! Sweat like a pig if you so choose! (I do, what can I say ... I sweat a lot!) You're doing something that's right for you! Be proud! 
And don't worry about not being able to lift a certian amount or do a lot of cardio. I finally talked my flatmate into coming to the gym with me. (She's like 5' and weighs NOTHING, but I got her to work out to combat depression) At first she couldn't do 10 minutes on the elliptical trainer! Now (3 months later) she totally rocks a 30 minute workout with me three times a week.  
*hug*

I bought the Techselect from bowflex roughly 500$, basicilly a full sort of dumbbells that can fit anywhere! I just started exercising and I'm determined, but i understand how you feel. Just my little alternative.

i know how you feel, i hated going to thegym alone, and to be honest im not even that over weight or unfit so i can imagine if you are the fear would be dauting. two solutions either find a friend to go with you, makes it so much more fun and youll motivate each other. Alternatively enrol in a corse of classes, yoga, areobics, spinning etc, you'll find the instructors are usually keen to help and understanding, get there a few mintues early on your first day and tell them you are new and need some extra help. You'll find the classes are more focus and not about checking each other out. After a few weeks youll get to know a few people in regular classes and so going into the main gym wont be so scarry as you will know people. you fittness levels rise quite quickly so 10mins today may be 30mins next month. Give it a go and just remember it will be you in a few months thats toned and fit and being checked out in the gym!

I've been there!  I never feel very comfortable at the gym, but the truth is that when I look around the room not one person is wathching me, nor does anyone care that I am there! 

As you are well aware there are many, many girls on college campuses that are overweight.  Instead of feeling ashamed that you are at the gym, you should feel PROUD that you are there while the others hide in their dorm rooms eating chips!! 

At the end of the term, YOU will be fitter and healthier and they will still be overweight and out of shape. 

Yep totally agree, getting something fun and cute to wear to the gym really helps. cuz you dont feel like your stuffed into that lyrca suit, you feel better about yourself.

2nd, get an mp3 player that way when your at the gym you can just put the ear phones in and block out the world around you

3rd try and join an all female gym, that really helped me, no guys around to worry about whats going on

4th be friendly, people are less likely to judge you and your going to feel like your being judged less if people are happy to see you and have a chat with you. You dont have to become best friends but a small conversation with people who are often there at the same time as you and the people who work there really helps create a warm comforting enviroment for you to go to

5th like the others said even its only 10mins so what, 10 mins on the treadmill is like 80caloires (going at the slow pace i go) or get on the exercise bike and thats 120 calories. Plus what youve burnt off walking there and back.

Finally. Screw all those bitches who look at you and stare. Just have faith in yourself that this is the last time whoever is around will see you looking like this. Yeah, you may look like this now but big whoop, each time you go back to that gym you will look better and better and be healthier and they are the ones who will be gobsmacked and you can judge THEM because they still have the same false superficial mindset 

I kow exactly how you feel. When I first started going to the gym a few months ago on a reg basis I was 362 and I felt like everyone would watch me. And I could only go for 15-20 mins. But I just dove in - got in, got out and tried not to pay attention to others. And honestly, I dont feel like anyone really watches me. And if they do just remember this - they prob respect the fact that youre there trying to improve your health. Thats how I look at it - Im there, just like them, to get healthy. And your 10 mins will soon turn into 20, turning into 30, turning into more. I do 45-60 minutes at a time now. It can be done. The important thing is that youre there!

Good luck - you CAN do this! =)

Ugh- like others on this board, I can totally relate. When I first started going to the gym I wore sweat pants and a big old t-shirt every time, even when I soaked it through- because I was really self concious about jiggling fat and just the general obviousness about the fact that I was a gym neub. That was back around February, and I'm 5'1" and weighed 150! That's a lot of weight for my height!

Really, the only way to get over it is to keep going. It's funny because I go to my college gym and so, depending on what time I go, there's sort of a core group of people that I always see there. I actually even have some head-nod friends these days (peeps I don't talk to, but we see each other often enough to recognize each other and acknowledge that). Anyway, just start going. And start at 10 minutes if you have to! I start at 15 on the treadmill, actually. Now I'm up to an hour on the elliptical and some weight training!

Just start going, take it easy, and when you start feeling comfortable, push yourself a little bit more. You'll totally be glad you did, I promise.

topazandrose - so have you been yet? promise you worrying about going is worse than actually doing it, get it over and done with today.

Rememeber dont push yourself to hard the first few times as it will be very tough but you'll notice in a few weeks you'll actually enjoy feeling your body work and you get a nice warm glow afterwards.

good luck, let us know how it went afterwards

Ah! I'm a college student too and it is threatening.  I haven't gone yet and I've been here for two years!  At home I had a stationary bike, and I used it about 2-3 times a week, but I can't go and do that here.  Seems like at college there are so many girls who haven't had their metabolism drop yet or play college sports.  I go to a liberal arts school, so there aren't many at the gym that aren't the pretty, popular, or athletic.  For three weeks now I've promised myself that I'll go and I still haven't! Too bad we don't go to the same school, we could go together.  (or talk about it anyway :P ) 

 Well, if I hear that you've tried it out I'll go too. 

 Good luck! And I know EXACTLY what you mean!

I can understand where you are coming from. I weighed 240lbs and couldn't bring myself to the gym that I had a membership to. So, I got a membership at a ladies gym for three months and started cc, and have lost about 35lbs. It gave me enough courage to go back to my giant coed gym. I went for the first time last Sunday because I figured it was the slowest day of the week and not many people would be there. I still felt intimidated, but it was just in my head. Not a soul looked at my still over 200lb self. I've been there 3 times this week and it has gotten so much better. I appluad you for going to the gym. And if you keep it up, you will feel and look better in now time at all.

then dont go till you get to a comfortable wt.


you dont have to workout to lose. especially when overwt.
i saved my working out for the last pounds.

working against natural inclinations would be a set up for quiting and failure for me.



 

This is harder then it sounds but you go to the gym for you, unless you are going to meet people and pick up on people you should go because it's good for you. You are doing this for you, you know you're overweight and maybe they will too but the reason to go to the gym is to get out of that cycle so you can walk around anywhere feeling good and confident. And if someone is just going to look at you and judge you are they going to have an opinion that matters to you anymore?

Don't be ashamed! You are doing something that is benefiting your health. Who cares what anyone else thinks! You have to put yourself first.

Just walk in there and hold your head up high and be proud that you are doing something healthy for yourself.

I work out at a gym and i pretty much ignore everyone and just focus on my workout. I find that if i become obsessed with worrying how others perceived me i won't get the benefit of my workout i'll be too distracted.

hang in there hunnie you'll be proud of your body before you know it! xoxo

So, any resolution yet from the original poster? You gone to gym yet or planning to soon? All of the replies you got are great.

No one will pay hoot to what you doing in the gym. Everyone for him/herself in there.

Wear whatever you feel comfortable wearing (I still wear my dinky sweat pants and layered tank top with T shirt over it) :p

Keep your mind in your own "zone" - music will help. Stick those earphone and crank up some music while you exercise.

Who said you gotta spend 1-2 hr at the gym??? In-Out, keep it simple-sweat-productive. 30min is my motto :)

Lastly, who says you have to exercise to lose weight? (of course it will help A LOT) That said, you can lose weight steadily by control and watch what you eat. 

-- my coworker has lost 5 lbs last week simply by watching how he eats. (With helpful directions from yours truly ) He started timing his eating to 5 times a day and watching how much calories and what he eats. It's not that he totally gone 'clean' eating, but this first step definitely on the right direction. Start small that way you can keep the pace and pick up the momentum when you get comfortable, and you less likely to give up.

If you're in college, sign up for a PE class next semester...tennis, swimming, dance, horseback riding, aerobics, yoga, whatever.  The teachers don't care what kind of shape you're in (I was around 250 through most of college) and you're mostly graded on just showing up. Then you'll HAVE TO GO or else it will hurt your GPA. It will also put you in the habit of exercising regularly.

But for now if the idea of "the gym" is holding you back, try a women only gym ( I find them less intimidating) or forget the gym and go for a nice long walk everyday, put on some headphones and tune everyone else in the world out.

Why not join a Curves? I know it has been knocked on here for not being strenuous enough.. but I started out there a long time ago and it is all what you make of it. If you walk on the stations and barely move then you won't see results. I, however, started there and lost 10 poiunds (I wasn't overweight to begin with) because I did the machines "hard" and ran in place and went an extra time around the circuit.

Now I go to the "normal" gym as I used Curves as a stepping stone into really getting into an active routine.