How to be assertive...?

Posting this here because I feel like this is probably a fairly common issue for us teens.

One of my best friends is visiting for about a week soon.  She moved 1,000 miles away but our ''group'' has stayed in touch and she visits every summer, and we do all sorts of fun/EXPENSIVE(ugh) stuff.  Anyway a couple of these girls are the type who can eat whatever they want and not gain weight.  Though in their defense they do play sports. I know that there will be many times at peoples houses, restaurants, ice cream places, theme parks, etc. where they are going to try to convince me to eat crap.  Last year I did this and gained a few pounds >.<

I think they finally have it down that I'm a vegetarian.  I'm also slowly going vegan (still eat eggs, sometimes milk products but don't want to).  In addition, I'm trying to eat very clean because I believe that diet and lifestyle directly causes acne.  I feel much more confident and healthy when my face is clear, so I'm trying to eat less processed stuff and fake sugar, etc.       WHAT CAN I SAY SO THAT THEY WILL LEAVE ME ALONE ABOUT IT?

I think common advice would be "its a special occasion/order a salad/one day won't hurt"

Well I recently had a couple special occasions (prom, end of finals, end of school!), and honestly have no desire to splurge.  I'm kind of in that mode where everything is going great and I feel no temptation.  What I will feel is annoyance if they try to convince me to eat things I really don't want.  I eat enough at home but don't want to eat out or eat crap.

My question is what are some things I can say to be assertive but not rude to make them mind their own business?  It just bugs me so much when people are all "EAT SOMETHING!" (imagine this in screeching teenage girl tone).  It sucks that they can't just worry about their own eating habits - aka eating crap and when they think they need to lose weight, not eating enough.  Anyway I need a few different ideas since I'll be seeing them so much.  I'm also really bad at being assertive.  Any ideas?

1. I have bad cramps because it's TTOM
2. I'm allergic
3. It makes my tummy upset 
4. I don't have enough money left
5. I'm chewing gum

I can relate kinda. I am vegan... a few months ago my friends confronted me saying that I need professional help because I dont eat meat/animal by-products. 

Thanks so much (:  I like the gum one; never would have thought of that.

And wow that is ridiculous.  I guess when it comes down to it, its just bothersome when others are not supportive of your lifestyle. *Sigh*

"No, thanks."

and let that be that.  If you make a big deal about refusing, then they will latch on and make it a big screeching "EAT SOMETHING" production.  But if you just calmly  and nonchalantly say, "No thanks." and leave it at that, I don't really see how their tantrums will have any fuel.  I really wouldn't lie, or make up excuses, because then what will happen after you've used them all up?  They'll see through it and call you out. 

I used to get this all of the time and it really annoyed the hell out of me. I used to say " No thanks I'm not hungry" Even though some of my friends were persistant I stood my ground and eventually they backed off :)

I used to do the "oh no thanks, I just ate"
or "I had a really big lunch"

I went out with friends once in the afternoon and used the excuse of "I'm going out to dinner with my family in an hour" [I actually was though hehe]


I can't eat kfc [not that I want to] because I get a really upset tummy after eating it [and usually spend a lot of time in the toilet afterwards. tmi?] so I guess you can use that as an excuse, and people will stop when you say that 'it gives me diarrhea!' haha
no one will tell you to eat after you say that lmao xD

Original Post by whatever07:

I can relate kinda. I am vegan... a few months ago my friends confronted me saying that I need professional help because I dont eat meat/animal by-products. 

 

LOL! Yes you obviously need to speak to someone!

I just say "No thanks, I'm not hungry/I ate earlier/I'm eating at my boyfriend's later, he's made a special meal" or whatever.

If you're planning on going vegan just become totally evangelical about it. Every time someone says "aren't you having cheese with that?" or "what do you mean you don't eat eggs?" just start ranting very loudly and passionately about the cruelty of the dairy industry or it's impact on the envoirnment or something. If you're eating out in public be even louder and more passionate!

They'll stop asking pretty soon!

Haha thanks guys (:  I think I will take your advice and just say no thanks firmly.  If they are really persistant I'll use your other creative ideas (: 

Not sure I can pull off being evangelical (I guess I'm sort of the opposite of that?) but if need be I will rant about how disgusting milk is :X Hopefully the craziness will scare them off of the topic like you said haha. Thanks (: (:

I totally commiserate! Especially with the vegetarian part; they try to convince me that eating meat it okay, as the fact that I don't eat meat affects their lives in some urgent and profound way =|. You've probably experienced the "You're already thin, don't worry, you can eat this stuff." They don't understand that you look the way you do because you don't eat unhealthy foods.

I think the best thing to tell your friends is that you just prefer food that are good for you. They might give you a hard time about it, but you can't force you to consume foods that you don't want. Being a vegetarian/vegan should help you out with avoiding some of the unhealthy foods, as a lot of desserts have dairy products in them. Honestly, your friends probably just feel insecure about the fact that you can eat well without really craving the kinds of foods they continually consume. Just smile and say you're not hungry, or that you don't like whatever they're trying to offer you, and don't give in to their pressuring. If they really are your friends, they should respect your decisions. Good luck =]