Boy question.....

This issue has been resolved. Thank goodness...

i was seeing a guy from eharmony (oh the crazy things we do!) and he lived about 2 hrs away.

it lasted a few months and then the distance thing pretty much go to us.  and to be honest, neither of us were all that into it.

i think that if we had been more into each other we could have made it work.  we were pretty good about trading visiting each other, or if he visited me, i shared the cost of food and vice versa.

a two to four hour drive tho is a lot, and a lot of variation in time.  i guess it depends on how much time you are willing to put out into finding out whether or not you guys will work well together.

my sister has a long distance bf --- at least a 4 hr drive.  and they are doing very well and see each other about 2-4 times per month (weekends and stuff).  its just a matter of how muchtime you want to put into it... and having a kid... makes it just that much more difficult.

**good luck** dont cancel your date.  see what happens... nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Wow! Thanks. It helps to know that I am not alone in "the crazy things I do." hehe! It was actually pretty fun being on eHarmony. I had a lot of dates back then, that's for sure. Just can't afford it anymore.

Anyway, thanks for the advice. I guess I'll give it a shot. May I ask, how often did you and this guy see eachother during those months you were seeing eachother?

I don't believe in long-distance relationships myself; however, I personally don't feel 2-4 hours is that far of a distance. It depends on how old you are and what you are looking for. If you're a person who is actively seeking long-term leading to serious committtment and/or marriage (and he is too), then that is nothing. If you're very young and dating, I say don't bother. You have to make some serious effort to see each other though. I would say AT LEAST every weekend. I actually had a bf whom I ONLY saw on the weekends and that worked out GREAT (Fri/Sat/Sun only). He lived 40 minutes away, which was nothing, but we worked different shifts.

In the future, limit your scope if you decide you can't deal with distance. That way you won't open yourself up to disappointment.

And there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with doing the personals! I have know a lot of people -- I kid you not! -- that have had success and even MARRIAGE! HAPPILY MARRIED!

about ever 2 weeks.  talked every day on the phone for way too long tho lol.

i only met 2 guys off eharmony.  im chicken LOL.  one was a total waste, the other i liked but... the physical stuff wasnt there like it should be.  he was the one that i ended up seeing for a while.  but i still talk to the first one i met and a few others.  the conversations were always phenomenal.

i just wish they had a way to account for personal preferences-- and not set me up with so many computer nerds LOL

What about trying Match.com (or others)?

I hear ya on the computer nerds, but you kinda gotta deal with that when you're looking for "love" on the computer. hehe!

I actually tried match.com before I tried eHarmony, but I found the people on there we're not really matched to my personality. I found a lot of guys who were there just to date a lot of girls. I never met anyone I liked on match.com.

It's weird, because this guy is the only guys I got matched with who was out of my area and he ended up being the one I liked the most. Go figure.

I been with someone for five years who lived over 1000 miles away!  We've been married for one year now.  If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.  It was very very hard!  But we did it.

i think eharmony was actually the best out of any of them as far as decent people who didnt want to just get laid.

tho there were the crazy ones who just wanted to get married lol.

i find it funny that match.com or whatever uses eharmony's rejection rate as its advertising right now.  i mean, im nuts and they didnt reject me so can you imagine the people that they DID reject???

what do you mean reject?  i remember i went there a few years ago and took the personality quiz, they said that there were no matches for me.  is that rejection??

i dunno.  i know that they wont accept some people's money b/c they cant or wont match them.

(and dont take it seriously i found it amusing.... i knew when i posted it someone was gonna say they were rejected and yell at me... i was teasing!  i swear....)

well, i never got to them asking me for money.  if i was rejected that's awesome!  i knew i was too weird!  that just made my day, haha!

I met my husband online 10 years ago we lived an hour and a half apart..... we talked on the internet everyday sometimes on the phone we visited each other every weekend and now ten years later I moved in with him and we are more in love now then we ever where then and happier then I ever thought possible

good luck

When my husband and I met we lived 4.5 hours away from each other.  We kept up the long distance thing for 4 years.  I eventually moved to his town and we have been married for 8 years now.  If its love, it will all work out.

Thanks for all your responses. Especially so late in the night/early morning. hehe!

I'm going to give it a shot and see what happens.

Good for you!

I met my boyfriend on a message board six years ago. We've only been together for 8 months at this point, and he lives halfway across the country unfortunately, but he's the one for me. We arrange to see each other every couple of months, and now I am working on selling my house so I can move closer to him. It definitely can work, you'll know if he's the right one at some point. Give it a shot!

4 people (2 couples) I know met through e-harmony and eventually married. They are really happy and seem well-suited for each other.

I agree with Kp4852 " If its love, it will all work out."

Distance only stays distance if neither person loves the other. If it's just a ' relationship ' nothing meaningful or special.  Otherwise, distance.... is a very simple thing to overcome. One shouldn't be so closed minded. The world isn't so big that two people from opposite sides couldn't collide if they really wanted to.

I actually met my now boyfriend - - who I will sometime in the future marry - - over a dating site not TOO long ago.

We're long distance right now.
ONly about 45 minutes realistically, but 1 1/2 hours travel time, and we see each other depending on my work schedule.

It's definitely worth the chance.
Just take it slow and keep some perspective on your situation. Don't get too involved right away. Appraise the situation before you jump in, but theres no reason not to give it a shot if you think it's worth a try.

for what its worth, my husband and I met 19 years ago and endured a long distance relationship for 1 year.  We lived almost 3 hours away.  We are still together....