bulimia.

can i just say that bulimia REALLY sucks.

agreed.  It takes over your life.

yeh.  at the end of each day it's my goal to just stop... but then the next day everything will be going great and out of nowhere I am back at square 1 again...  and the worst part is when I am out with people (usually it just seems to effect me when I am alone/at night) and all of a sudden I just feel like I ate too much and need to throw up and it's like the only thing I can think about until I leave

yep, its the worst.

i did this to my toilet seat - its kiiiinda helping:

woops. guess i cant post pics. anyway, i painted a mean face on the inside of my toilet seat. i know it sounds weird, but sometimes little things like that can stop you in your tracks when you are caught up in a binge.

NO JOKE.

jess how are u doing these days?

is anyone looking for a "accountability buddy" to recover with?

i've learned i cannot do it alone.  it takes someone who's been in your boat, and want to get out as badly as you do, to keep you on track.

no1 else could possibly understand the pain & raw emotions a bulimic goes through...

i have relapsed so many times.  i am tired of living like this!!!   i need to gain my life back.  what's left of it at least

 

:(  I.  Hate.  Bulimia.  It's created this monstrously SICK relationship with food.

 

It started as anorexia and when i realized THAT wasn't making me happy: hello, Bulimia.

At the end of the night, the world comes together and everything makes sense.  In the morning, I'm strong and good.

 

But the problems start as I take that FIRST bite of food, evern if it's a healthy meal.  I am addicted to being skinny and I'm in this mindset of: "Well I'm going to throw it up anyway, might as well eat like a pig."

Yep I agree.  I hate it when I promise myself I’ll never do it again......then within a week I’ve stuffed up.  It is definitely a nasty soul destroying disorder.