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| Weight Loss | saddlebags i HATE IT PEOPLE | Aug 25 2009 08:19 (UTC) |
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Like someone said, spinning, or any bike riding, will help. Swimming is the best. I too struggle with saddlebags, and swimming is the only thing I have found to really slim them. Good luck! |
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| Foods | silly question about flavored coffee... | Sep 26 2008 18:04 (UTC) |
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There's no calories in brewed coffee, even flavored ones (unless you add something). I read somewhere that the flavor comes from extract that's added, but it doesn't add any calories. Yay! |
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| Health & Support | Always had a healthy relationship with food...dealing with a sexual assault...turning into a binge eater | Sep 24 2008 15:04 (UTC) |
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You were not responsible for the assault, and you are not responsible for what else the perpetrator may or may not do. You have no obligation to report to police or to tell anyone if you don't want to. It's not the right path for everyone. It is very common for people, in their outrage at what happened, to urge surviviors to report to police and to "get the guy." Unfortunately, very rarely do these cases result in prosecution or even apprehension. This is not your responsiblity. Report it (if you haven't already) only if you feel it is the right thing for you. If you have safety concerns, I hope you'll talk to someone right away- it can be law enforment, a counselor, a friend... develop a safety plan that's realistic for your situation, if necessary. |
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| Health & Support | Always had a healthy relationship with food...dealing with a sexual assault...turning into a binge eater | Sep 24 2008 03:26 (UTC) |
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This shouldn't have happened to you- no one deserves to be assaulted. You said in your post that you feel like it's your fault, but then again, you know it isn't true. It's really normal to feel that way, and as you can see from the other reply, binge eating is a common way to deal with it. Sounds like you know in your head that it's not your fault, but still kinda feel like it is. It isn't. There's no argument or difference of opinion about this- the only person responsible, the only person who could've stopped the assault, was the perpetrator. And it didn't matter what you looked like or dressed like. It was about power, not sex or desire. Besides, a woman is allowed to dress however she wants, go where she wants, drink if she wants...that doesn't give anyone the right to assault her. I read a really good analogy for sexual assault called The Rape of Mr. Smith that had to do with comparing rape to getting robbed. You can read it at http://www.keithedwards.us/Rape%20of%20Mr.%20 Smith.pdf. ; It's pretty great- talks about how a man wearing an expensive suit, carrying money, and in a bad neighborhood was asking to get robbed. Maybe he wanted to get robbed. After all, he has given money away to charity before, maybe he was giving it away this time (like the fact that a woman has had consensual sex before means maybe this time wasn't rape). Anyway, I'm going on and on- sorry. I'm a victim advocate for sexual assault survivors and I get a little riled up. I agree that you should seek out some professional support. There is surely a local organization you can find. You could check out www.rainn.org or call 1-800-656-4673 to find one.
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