Posts by sealion311

meryl, fidget, wakingeye,

Thank you SO much for these posts. I went to bed a bit disheartened last night, just feeling kind of alone. Im glad to see I am not the only one in this position. 

Meryl: My doctor actually recommeneded that book, apparently hes a big follower of this guy.  He always stresses to me the importance of hunger cues and stuff. Its still new and very hard for me. When I was in the hospital, I learned to get out, I would have to binge. Then in therapy being on 3500 cals i learned that full fat ice cream was an easy way to make goal and be released. Now I am happy to no longer be under such strict guidelines, but I still dont recognize hunger like I should.  I either have to plan or I just wait till like 9 pm and then crazy eat. Some days are better than others of course, but Im glad to not be on this journey alone. Congratulations x a million on your gift of life. Aunt flow has come back into my life so I can only hope to have a baby one day.

Fidget: You are so right about it being "desensitization therapy" My only problem with it was that I morphed food from one non-realstic thing (badbadbad evil) to another (my ticket to escape from that place). Now being in my own apartment, alone, I have not yet been able to make food what it is: nourishment for the body and soul. If you have any tricks on how to do that it would be so appreciated. But you have one thing so dead on the nose... working on the OTHER issues really seem to help make the eating thing go away. Like I was using it as a crutch to focus all ym time and energy into so i didnt have to deal with the rest.  And I find on my weak days, alot of it has to do with depression/anxiety issues as well. I was just switched from paxil and prozac (put on those bc they have a side effect of wt gain) to ativan/clonipin PRN and zoloft (wt neutral).  I think Im having a rough time making the switch. I am so happy to know there are more people out there...I will pm when I have more time :)

wakingeye: again, so happy to hear i am not alone. and you sound liek an inspiration to me. You sound happy, successful, with kids-exactly where I want to be. Your message was lively, and u didnt really focus on weight being an issue, it just is what it is. Any tips on how u got there would be greatly appreciated!!

Ummm really?

I am trying to recover just like you. Because I gained weight that means I dont have a problem? I was just wondering if anyone else out  there had gone through all this nonsense and now finds themselves on the the other end, not underweight but overweight. And I believe this is a suport forum, which is what I am looking for.

Sorry if this thread is displeasing to you.

So there is just no possible way i can catch up on 63 posts! So I'm just gonna say hi and start anew!

My boards were friday and I have pretty much been a drunken mess since then. The exams went okay, but I wont know my score for 6 weeks. It was the longest most tedious 8 hours and 20 minutes of my life....i REALLY hope I passed and dont have to go through that again.

I stopped working out the last 2 weeks bc everything got to stressful, btu I have been back at it. Quick summary:

Sat: 20 mile bike ride- breakfast: cereal, lunch: cereal, dinner: italian out with the fam. Went to NYC for "the night" and ended up staying till monday.  LOOOOOTS of drinks.

Sun: all you can drink brunch. I ate about a pancake and a half and 2 mini muffins.  I drank about 7 peach bellinis, 1 margarita, and lotttts of shots (was there the WHOLE time 11-6-my friends the bartender) then got sushi and another bottle of wine, went to a bar to play beer pong and had nachos. VERY HEALTHY DAY :)

Mon: fruit smoothie (best hangover cure), BEACH, clam shack for lunch (cajun swordfish, some onion rings, 3 shrimp cocktail) then remembered I had a race to run as I see all these people pulling up to the beach Im at. Rush my friend to the train station (she had to go home to nyc), luckily had sneakers in the car...run my best 5k ever (24:28)...free beer post race (very healthy dinenr of miller lite and pretzels and choc. cookies)

Today: ran 6 miles (also a good hangove cure), mediterranean tuna on ciabatta (local delish panera-esque place), golden delicious apple, some soy nuts, a kashi frozen meal with some homeade pea soup.  Oh and a long walk midday in town.

So thats my life in a nutshell these past few days!!! Thursday night I am going to fire island for another night of craziness, then this weekend is my step borthers wedding (lots of food and drink) then next wed i leave for vegas. SHEESH. my life is so fun and crazy right now. What a 180 from the boards!!! Oh and I also have school eveyrday 9-1. And I need to find an apt and move into NYC by august 1st. LOL Gotta live life while you can.

Missed you guys!

PS. 136 today

i weighed 137 this morning. and my weight is just going to keep going up i know it, especially with these eating habits. ice cream, crappy food, no exercise. my god, i cannot wait to get my life back. and im actually happy with the 137, I just FEEL yuck, like its 137 of fat, no muscle. 137 of ice cream, not mixed greens...u know?

well guys, i am off to do a practice exam. i'll let you know how it goes. thank you all for being so utterly supportive of me this whole process. almosssssst there

So there has been 25 posts since I last posted, jeez louise! Its pretty much impossible for me to respond to everyone, but I figured I would drop in and let ya'll know Im doing alright.  TEN DAYS until my exam. I am super nervous, but things are coming along... Im only like 2 days behind where I wanted to me, which for me, is pretty amazing.  I'm a bit of perfectionist I guess you could say, and a bit ocd.  My dad keeps reminding me I am NOT going to get 100% but why strive for lower...haha. Speaking of dads, theyre back from vacay so I have been eatin good, feels better to avoid all that take out.  My weights all over the place (133 yest, 135 today I think 136 the day before) but (graphic---I haven't pooped in like 4 days)--really hoping to accomplish that today! I have this problem all the tome when I get stressed...kinda used to it. But I get super bloated-plus miss ttom comes sunday.  OF COURSE im going to haver her for my exam, which is just awful because its an 8 hour, 10 minute exam. You get ONE 50 minute lunch break and 2 optional 10 min breaks but if you take them, they count it against your time...hope i dont have to.

Anyways, I'll sample my menu from yesterday for you guys:

breakfast: couple blueberries, couple strawberries, couple pieces melon. bowl of cereal (puffed wheat+kashi golean+raisin bran---i looove mixing and i do not measure, but they're big) w/ unsweetened almond milk

snack: some gobstoppers (some meaning alot)

lunch: 2 eggbeaters on a trader joes ciabatta roll with salsa + apple

snack: entire thing of sf jello (not the prepackaged), about 10 pretzels, maybe 3 vanilla meringues, a couple tostitos scoops (this is what I do...Igo downstairs and grab a couple things-im a GRAZERRRRR)

dinner: mixed greens + tomatoes with honey mustrad, corn on the cob, broiled cod (which my dad caught 2 days ago-yummo), white jasmine rice, 1 ciabatta roll

dessert: 4 choc. covered pretzels and a werthers

No workout yest, hoping to do something today.... Went for 2 long runs this wknd (9 and 8 miles) and I have been craving muffins--had a BIG bran muffin sunday (does anyone know how many calories approximatley that is...I figured 400 but am i lowballing?) but i think i may need to buy some smaller vitas... anywho off to study world. have a good day ya'll

i would suggest using that 1500 calories as a baseline, and then adding in your exercise.  So to lose a pound a week (500 calorie deficit per day), if you burned 675 calories on the treadmill+1500 calories BMR (total 2175) then you should eat approximately 1675 calories/day and you will lose 1 pound per week...

thats how I do it and it works for me

Hey guys.  So things are getting crazy around here. I had to take 2 straight days off from working out in a row...but last night I brought a review book to the gym and it was actually helpful! I started off by running a mile (no book) then got on the elliptical for a half hour (reading book) and then walked on a huge incline for half an hour (reading book) then biked 20 mins (reading book). My HR sure wasnt like 130 (I think it averaged about 100 on the bike/tread but it was higher on the elliptical) but hey, thats alot mroe than I had been doing! I have exactly 2 weeks until my exam..aka cram time. I am so nervous and stressed, last week i ate4 so horrifically I don't even wanna go there. Im up to about 134.5-135 (I did see 138 at one point!) but I'm hangin in there!

Snow: your back! its good to hear from you. Sorry the watering job is stinky lately.  At least your having a good time with your kids. I know what you mean about eating crap though. Ive been living on ice cream sundaes (yea full fat style with hot fudge and all), burgers, fries, i even had fried calamari the other day-whoa.  But whatever, isn;t the reason I lost the weight to be able to still live my life, just try and move more, make smarter choices to balance those out? PS. your gazelle sounds fun!!!!

k9: Any of the skinny lattes I like, skinyn caramel can be too sweet but I still like it. They used to have a skinny mocha, but they took it away, sad for us.  Your choco-tortila creations sound delectable. Sounds like your keeping pretty active, ah I can't wait till I have just a little more time to indulge!

krrpt: so cute that your bf is the one who got you out of bed to work out. the guy im "seeing" always keeps me on my toes too bc hes marathon training (which i just finished-but hes doing it bc i "inspired" him).  So now hes like eh just ran 10 miles and lifted (hes kind of musculary too) so Im like ugh better go do SOMETHING caroline!!!!! LOL. Congrats on being back down-im not surprised though, you seem pretty darn grounded.YUCK i hate babysitting. Im not a big fan of kids to begin with (though I have a niece I adore) but when other people make me sub-in-mom to their brats, no thanks. But have fun! lol but im sure the wedding saturday will be waaaay more fun. PS i love your food choices...mmmm i think i may make pancakes today! Im inspired.

agru: i am a sweater too. its so gross but im just used to it now.  i def agree with 1800.  We have a ton of pb&co here too, i really like cinnamon swirl and white choc.  But pb is actually not my fav thing (thank god) though I eat it b4 my long runs (>like 10 or so miles-which I havent done in a while) bc its the one thing that holds me over that I dont wanna yak up lol.  Your new menu seems strangely like your old one!!!!!  Except now your bfast is smaller and you had a couple nuts? Hm. Your a tough cookie to break huh?  Oh and lol my bf is NOT from israel. I went to college with him where i had a huge crush on him but then he got in contact with me on facebook this year and now were "talking".  He's just overseas right now (in prague and greece and malta).  But i do know jdate, and I think its awesome. Seems to work for most of my friends.

ok gonna try to start this mess, maybe ill go to the 45 min spin class at 9, thatd be nice to have someone plan my workout for me-no thoughts involved.

krrpt: wow that food sounds amazing. Especially the lunch LOL. And casada cake sounds amazing. I had strawberries dipped in dark choc. pudding last night. So good I did it with 2 puddings and used pineapple the second time around MMMM.

k9: Nice job with netteing 745! Can you give me some of those? I didnt d anything yesterday and dont feel like it today either. Yea its yucky weather out here today...I wonder if you guys sent it up here! It amazes me that you still log your food, you are so dedicated. That made me so anxious bc I am kind of a "grazer" so I would forget, a pretzel here, some grapes here. Plus I don't measure anymore-no time! But your day yesterday sounds delish...all stuff I eat too!And skinny vanillas are my fav-90 cals of mmm.

Agru: I dont have a bf either. Wouldn't it be nice though? Where are they all hiding is what I wanna know!!!! I mean, I think were prety good catches! LOL. Im settling for talkking to a boy who is overseas, and I havent seen since college. Talk about frustrating. I know what you mean about the full thing. Sometimes I have "hungry days" and I have no idea why. I think that eating mroe wont help, but it actually does. Like I AM actually hungrier. i feel like maybe you really should try changing up your foods. A) although nutritious, you might be lacking some vitamins not getting anough variety (do you take a multi?) B) its like exercise. Say every day all you did was 30 min. on the elliptical resistance 3. Your body eventually gets used to it and it becomes easier. Maybe your body has gotten used to those meals or something and its craving more, and maybe not even more cals, just more variety? Your day sounds yummyyy though! Italy....dream. I hope I go there one day. I am going to vegas in july, maybe I'll go to the Venetian hotel and take the gondola ride and pretend.

I say no to the berries. I never taste a difference, and to me I would only spend the money if they tasted better.  In addition, organic berries rot so much faster! LOL. I typically spend my money on organic veggies as I think some of these taste waaay better (corn, carrots, celery, poatoes) but as far as fruits, most organic ones don't taste much different-except maybe certain apples..IMO

It was January 1st 08 when I decided to give running a go. I ran for 2 minutes. I walked home.  I felt....good, but waaay out fo shape, but I decided my goal for Jan 2 would be 3 minutes.  I was 165 lbs. 

 By that June I was ready for my first 5k. I ran it in 29:50...I was so thrilled. I kept running, every week adding a little more. I started trying more hills, trails, parks, sprints, I was lovinggg reading about it, and doing it, I was so hooked. September of 08-ran my first 10k in 54:30...wow!!! Weight: 135 lbs.

Kept running, more and more. Joined a local running club. Started training for a half marathon, which turned into training for a full marathon.  Nashville Country Music marathon completed April 25, 2009- 4:19.  Weight: 133 lbs.

Running helped me drop a BUTTLOAD of weight and gain so much confidence at the same time.  I always had low self esteem and running was the one thing that INTERNALLY made me feel good about myself. It is so empowering, so freeing, so BAH i love it. You'll be hooked, just make sure to push through times you want to give up and you'll get that runners high in now time-with the added benefit of shed lbs!

OK so I decided today was going to be my eat whatever and whenever day.  I took that to the extreme. I went for about a 7 miler this morning, had some oatmeal and an apple (im a rome fan too agru!!!!!), then went to a sculpt class at the gym for an hour, came home and has a tunafish sandwich and hummus with triscuits. Was so content and then got really into my work... next thing I know I am famished, and its 7"00pm. i run to the pizza place and get a HUGE slice of pizza, a side ceaser salad, plus 3 garlic knots.  SOOOO good. I took a ncice hot shower and then decided "wow I want a huge ass sundae". So i made a HUGE sundae in a HUGE bowl using almost HALF of my container of slow churned edys neopolitan (600 cals), covered it in a dark chocolate ff jello pudding and like half the container of coolwhip.  I think after all of this, I seriously only ate 3000 calories. I know its funny to say ONLY but its only 1000 more than I usually eat. Im sure I'll look and feel heavier, but honestly, I haven't felt so full, but amazingly full ya know, since who knows. 

I'm running 10 miles tomorrow am with some buds and then were going to the most amazing diner-where I always get a strawberry milkshake and pancakes hehe. I like letting loose...just keeping that scale hidden! People should tell me I look like a stick more often I guess! Oh and I'm 5'9" - im a tall one

Anyways agru, keeping kosher, although annoying (im jewish too) really allows for alot of stuff, aka almost everything I said earlier. I love israeli meditteranean foods..and all are made with healthy olive oil and lots of proteins (ex: hummuses, baba ganoush, falafel...mmmmm). Even if you just buy some frozen stuff (ps. dr pragers makes the most amazing veggie patties-at only 100 cals each-and theyre kosher.) Ok well Ill stop babbling off advice you didnt ask for lol. byeeeee

ahhh same!

This sounds like classic celiac. Especially the rash, it is called dermatitis herpetiformis.  Google it and look up pictures.  If that is what your rash looked like, you have celiac. 

I weigh every day basically out of habit.  I am maintaining so it isn't really necessary at this point, but when i was losing it was very helpful to see the numbers daily. If they were going down say 2 lbs a week vx 0 lbs I could really go back and analyze the why. for example, there was a week I gained 2 lbs. When I re-analyzed I realized I was underestimating the calories in alot of my food that week. Also, there is actual research on this...check out this article:

Good luck and welcome to cc!

 http://www.ahc.umn.edu/news/releases/weighing 111605/home.html

If you were breaking it up so it wasn't a continuous 8 hours..that would be a problem.  But it isn't a problem (per se) if you are getting 8 hours straight.  Now if your question is more regarding eating... ie: you stay up till 2 and after 9 pm you snack all night and then don't eat until dinner the next day, then yes that's a problem.  Then you choose: change your eating habits or sleeping habits.  If you like the sleep habit, just change your diet. AKA, say you awaken at 10am, eat breakfast then, have a small snack at noon, lunch around 2, 230, snack at 5ish and then have a late dinner around 830-9.  If you have room for dessert, perfect, have it around midnight.