Posts by chippyelizalou

Breakfast : Oatmeal made with water, vanilla protien powder & brown sugar. An apple.

Snack : Apple & Blueberry crumble yoghurt.

Lunch : Toasted ham wrap (ham, cream cheese, tomato, cucumber, spinach, alfalfa). Orange & an apple.

Snack : Vegemite sandwich on wholemeal bread. Chocolate soy milk.

Snack : Apricot & almond protien bar. EDIT: forgot to add a plate of vegies (carrot, pepper, celery) with salsa for dipping!

Dinner : Tuna Pasta (whole weat pasta, can of tuna, carrot, celery, peppers, tomato paste, spices) & a salad.

Snack : Apple & a frozen strawberries & cream yoghurt (SO GOOD!).

i had the worst night last night. was up late doing an assignment. at midnight i realised i was starving, so too the kitchen i went......

id been really good all day (good as in balanced/healthy, not really calorie wise :( im almost recovered from ED, so eating 2500cals), so i decided to go the healthy choice by having an apple. but no that didnt satisfy my hunger, so i had a high calcium ice cream (this somehow seems 'healther' to me than regular ice cream??? pfft im so pathetic). nup that didnt do it either......

i then consumed:

1/2 jar pb + 2x100 cal snacks + endless slices of rasin toast + tons of CASHEWS (whyyy?) + milo, lots and lots of it + rasins + cereal..... (+ i cant even remember the rest... ive totally blocked it out.)

......all in the space of 15mins.

i went from being healthy at 12am to feeling sick to my stomach and 1500+ cals heavier (not really, but you know what i mean..) at 12.15am!

i felt so full/sick i could not sleep. i got a really bad headache from all the sugar while my stomach and back ached from the amount of food. ontop of this... i got hunger pains 30mins later, like i still felt bloated as, but hunger at the same time? wtf....

anyway... woke up this morning feeling so sick still. the thought of food actually makes me wanna puke. :( im still so full.

i dont really care about the consequence (ie. weight gain), because thats sorta my goal anyway. Im just so ashamed and disgusted at myself for loosing control like that and turning into a mad woman.... in 15 **** minutes (excuse my language)!!! 

all i can think is failure....

i hate this.

sorry to post so negatively...... i just really needed to get this out.

* . . Favorites*
Color bell pepper:: red
Favorite herb or spice:: chilli powder
Hot beverage:: peppermint tea
cookie:: chocolate chip
Soda:: Pepsi Max
Type of bread or bread product:: wraps or wholegrain spelt bread
Midnight snack:: peanut butter
Soup:: Pumpkin!
Type of cake:: um... date and walnut probably
Type of hummus:: anyyy
Pastries:: not really into them...
Fruit:: omg apples. And strawberries
Vegatable:: Everything!
Style of cuisine:: thai thai thai

* . . Have You Ever . . *
Ate on your rooftop?: No lol
Ate outside in the rain?: yea i guess.. not like a meal or anything tho
Dropped food in public?: yep
smelled something good and ate it even though you weren't hungry?: all the time
Laughed so hard you chocked on your food?: see above :P
Picked fresh fruit?: yep, mum grows passionfruit, strawberries, rockmelon and watermelon!
had to give up a certain food you love due to health reasons?:: yes – cause of wheat intolerance, but screw that haha... i prefer food over pain!
stole or "grazed" at a grocery store lol?: yeah grapes... all the time
purchased a food item just because someone else did?: Yep
ate at a table with someone you didn't know?: Yeah i guess
Gone out of your way to  cook for someone?: Yeah family and ex bf
snuck food into a movie theater?: all the time. Theatre food is the biggest rip off1
gone for ice cream in the winter?: Yea when i was younger. Don’t like ice cream anymore tho
Been in a food fight?: yep... popcorn!

* . . Who was the last person to . . *
share food with you?: my brother
Tell you you are a good cook?: brother... made spaghetti and meatballs haha  
go grocery shopping with you?: mumma
help you cook?: brother
take you to dinner?: best friend
cook for you?: mummy
Take you to lunch?: cannot remember.... probably my brother
Call you a bad cook?: no idea, prob my brother when we were younger
Buy you ice cream?: best friends mum haha
Buy you snacks at the movies?: mum i guess... like years ago, before their prices went through the roof1
bake for you?: mum
Ordered a pizza with you?: ex bf
treat you to a gourmet meal?: parents
tease you for a kitchen mishap?: family!

* . . What's the last . . *
thing you had for lunch?: ham and salad wrap with a side of steamed aspagagus + an apple + chocolate milky!
Time you cooked?: last night
Meal you had?: breakfast
Jell-o you ate?: aaages ago
Soup you ate?: pumpkin :)
Cookie you ate?: ginger
Drink you've had?: diet vanilla coke
nutritious thing you ate?: apple
bagel you ate?: over a year ago?
Food you've eaten?: apple :P
Flavor of gum chewed?: prob peppermint
sauce you used?: sweet chilli
Grocery store you shopped at?: Coles
treat you had?: chocolate

* . . Can You . . *
make  homemade bread?: yep
eat dairy?: Yes
Bake a cake?: yeah
Roll your own burritos ?: are there are people who cant?
Cook meat?: Yea
toast toast with out burning it?: yea... the toaster does all the work lol
decorate a cake nicely?: No way
Multi task in the kitchen?: yep
understand cookie jargon?: Nope lol
Impersonate a certain dish?: yeah
Prepare a holiday meal?: never tried...
Cook anything really well?: tuna pasta/casserole haha

* . . Finish The Line . . *
If i were a snack food I'd be ...: something super sweet :P
I wish I could cook ...: Pad Thai... the way they do in restaurants
So many people don't know I make great ...: porridge haha
I am never going to eat ...: krispy kremes ever again!
My food weakness is...: peanut butter... so bad! Why couldn’t it be something a little less calorie dense!!

im pretty sure i have this problem too. But in my case, i eat around 1000 throughout the day,  then when it gets to night time... i scoff my face!! Its making me feel so bad. Im in recovery for anorexia, so im on a 2500cal diet right now. So that makes my "binge" aprox 1500 cals almost EVERY NIGHT. I cant help not so much restricting, but really controling, what i eat throughout the day. Then im proud because ive done so well, but then i get guilty because i know i have to get to 2500 so i can finally kick this eating disorder crap in the rear end! so then i eat everything i can find untill i reach 2500, i then go to bed in pain and feeling sick. i hate this

thats my story anyway. My question for you guys is, is that technically a "binge" if im doing it to meet my goal?

Personally, im undecided. But i think i take both sides just to make myself feel better haha.

But then i read of people on 3000+ diets that have to have 1000cal bowls of oatmeal etc just before bed. So thats kinda the same.... except they have control. But its almost the same amount of cals.. :S

as you can see i really dont know much about this at all. I used to eat my 2500 properly, but recentrly its just gone nuts...

help! hehe

xxx