Posts by akica123

Hey guys,

this is a great post i have to say!! I am fairly tall, 5 ft 9, and currently weigh about 149 pounds give or take. 3 months ago, when i first joined CC i was sooo happy at 140 pounds but lacking motivation to stay that way as i started on a cycle of binge eating patterns....eeeek... got worse and here i am at 149 pounds and not happy with myself. It's terrible i think. And i have noticed that ever since my semester holidays from uni began that's when my binging really took off.

I find it that if i try to keep my calorie intake at 1200 a day, it's not a problem for me to lose weight. I can lose about a kg to kg and half in a week if i really want to. It's just the motivation and i would have to say control. But reading these posts really reminds me that i am not alone and there are women taller than me who are struggling but finding the strength, or trying to find the strength to get back on the bandwagon and reach their goals.

I'll be hitting this forum quite a bit :D

p.s. tomorrow i'm starting allllllll over again hahaha. cheers xxxx

Umm i just check my last post, i can't believe that was like 2 months ago. I am worse than i have ever been. I binge every 2 days now, it's disgusting. I have put on about 5 kgs. and what's worse, i don't see myself stopping this cycle of destruction. I feel so terrible. TOday was the worst day, to date.

Reading these posts actually made me feel a little better as I keep forgetting I am not the only one going through this. I love the posts!! Tomorrow i shall start 'no binge day 1' (even though i started it last monday lol)  I honestly feel like noone understands. I don't know how to explain it to anyone. Not even my own sister. I keep telling them i am not myself when this happens, it's as if i have been possessed by some food monster. It's so gross. I want to be normal like all my friends. I don't want to think about things like calories at the tender age of 20. I want to be happy and not sit infront of my laptop counting the calories i consumed within the day and cringing at the thought of exceeding a certain set limit i had for the day (let alone for the week!!!!) But unfortunately, I can not regain self control if i don't do this....i need to sit and think about what i really want....and that is to be truly happy with myself. The friends that do know about this think I am crazy about always wanting to lose weight. Maybe I am...but that's something i need to realise for myself one day....i hope to God it's sooner rather than later..... coz i really can't take this anymore...

Peace peoples xx

have you been to the doctors for that? My sister had a similar problem, and the doctor said she had polysystic ovarian syndrome...thank god, however, it went away.