Posts by ninafish

Breathes - who are these people you are referring to? How long into their "recovery" did you see them and gauge this (the fact that they never got their figures back). What were their ages pre/during/post ED? 

Your body will only punish you if you revert to ED behaviours. If you give it time to trust you again, the weight will redistribute as nature intended for your particular body type. I'm sorry hon, but this calls for patience. You just have to give it time to heal.

Hello breathes,

I remember your urgent posts of some months ago - may I say you now sound SO much more balanced and "together". For future reference, if ever (God forbid) you feel as if you could be approaching relapse, compare those old posts to this current post. It is literally comparing insanity to sanity. I for one am so so so very pleased to hear you in a much more cohesive frame of mind xox.

I second iceblue's contribution: recovery takes time (entirely dependent on the extent and duration of the illness, and how far one has proceeded in the recovery process). You have not been so long in recovery (though you have made huge in-roads and are sounding MUCH better for it), but the physical changes (and further mental ones, too), will take some time to manifest. Your hair WILL thicken up as long as you continue refeeding as you are - and your body will rebuild itself. The weight you gain also does eventually redistribute as it should. Initially it is stored in what I like to term the "emergency reserve" areas (which your body will personally dictate for itself: for some it is the thighs, some the bum, many primarily the gut/around the vital organs), but as your body learns to trust you again (something only achieved by continuing with a regular and balanced meal plan), it will balance itself in the manner it did previously. And remember, you are only 14 and still developing, so there will be additional changes you can't really account for. You are young hon, and this should work in your favour: i.e. you will be able to bounce back fairly rapidly. Just please, please, please keep going as you are - you deserve a wonderful life.

Love and blessings to you sweetheart xox

PS - I have been through the recovery process (unfortunately, not just once), so if you ever need someone to hash it out with, please don't hesitate to drop me a message.

I will hang in there. Thank you so much xoxoxox

Butterskid that was an extremely ignorant and damaging post. Please ignore it, sarah. You need to be focusing on recovery. We're here for you xoxox

Tony, I just want to tell you that you look, and more importantly sound as if you feel, ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL!!!! I am really so very happy for you. Yes, you are a wonderful person and you deserve so many awesome things in life, and they will keep coming to you in the absence of the ED. Good on you boy, you are an inspiration to us all! I wish you the absolute best in your continuing journey throughout life. With love, Nina xoxoxoxox

And you are beautiful too recovery hon :)

Awesome princess :)

Original Post by afluffyadorablebunny:

I do all that sorta stuff that might be artificial...because I like me ...

^ I think the fact that you do it out of 'self-LIKE' is key. That's positive. It's not about insecurity and worrying about what others think, but you choose to accentuate the goods and care for yourself for YOU.

You can do it recovery! Basically, the story you're describing sounds almost identical to mine. And I can truly say that I'm out and about nowadays - so the sedentary bingeing won't be forever. You have just swung from one extreme to the other. Which is why restriction won't work. Moderation/temperance is the lesson here - balancing your meals and eating ENOUGH. And remember, your meals will probably be larger than the meals of those around you for quite some time, until you are recovered. You'll do it hon. You keep going. I'm taking those steps with you in spirit. xox

*hugs recovery*

You'll be just fine hon. Remember we're here to support you. You're not alone :) x

cowcow - so true about one person's statement feeling as if that's how the entire world perceives you. You are particularly susceptible to such comments when in the grips of the anxiety/brain malfunction caused by malnutrition/obsession with weight. It can turn into a truly devastating spiral. I think a lot of us ED sufferers have always cared too much about what others think - We feel as if we lack an 'inner gauge' - and so source confirmation/reassurance externally.

bsh - My ex fiance likewise preferred me at a higher weight. But even that didn't spur me on sufficiently to get better when we were still together, unfortunately. I really had to hit rock bottom before appropriate change could be facilitated. I just clung so hard to ED - there are aspects of it I still cling to (due to faulty thinking). And so now I really am working hard on counting calories to ensure I receive ADEQUATE nutrition to function properly.

Gosh, I just want us all to feel okay in our own skin. All of you beautiful girls deserve to. Heck, if you had BMIs of 30+ you'd STILL be incredible and lovely individuals.

Original Post by gi-jane:

Original Post by ninafish:

What kind of diet clubs would you generally recommend, gi-jane? :)

They've all got strengths and weaknesses.  I quite like the Rosemary Conley club because it combines exercise with a healthy diet... although her diet plan is way too low-fat and has a few other niggles.  Weightwatchers is fine if you can ignore the selling-on that happens and if you stick with healthy eating.  I quite like a site called www.ediets.com which offers people chance to create their own calorie-counted menu-plans from a database....  and the online ones are good if you don't want to be weighed-in and have to sit in a room with other people.

Thanks Jane :) x

What kind of diet clubs would you generally recommend, gi-jane? :)

Hey evo :)

Yeah, I recall getting a few negative gasps when I wore certain pants... And I remember one occasion when I was out walking in a singlet top and these girls that passed me literally had their mouths hanging open. This still did not deter me in the slightest - I thought it was just their reaction because "normal western society" was "fat". I was really, truly delusional/psychotic. And I am certain that the "smoking hot" comment would not have been applicable if I had been naked. I just managed to wear clothes incredibly well at lower weights. This can be compared to models I suppose, and the "coat hanger" skeletal bodies they inhabit. This really isn't beauty, it's just about fashion. Truly, most runway models must look 'scary' in the nude. I never gave a flying **** about fashion. It was all just about control for me...

I LOVE unconventional beauty. Really, to be honest, I can find absolutely anyone beautiful in some way - I have yet to find someone who I can't find something beautiful about (and yes that's physically, I don't even need to get to know them first). But yes of course when you add the dimension of personality it is even more pronounced... I do have a particular penchant for things that make people "unique". Like a facial scar, or slightly wonky teeth, or funky eyebrows... I find these kinds of traits much more interesting than the "conventional" norms.

To the OP - it's so inspiring to see you embracing the greek goddess within. You are approaching health and self acceptance in such a positive light. I hope I can follow in your footsteps someday. Good on you girl :)

And to everyone else who has posted - you're all beautiful! You really are :)