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| Weight Loss | how long did it take for your body image to change? | Oct 13 2007 07:16 (UTC) |
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| Body image is a weird weird thing. It's taken me two plus years and about 140 pounds to calm the fear of weight encroaching back on my body. I still have some of that fear, but I've also developed some trust in myself and what I'm doing. But even now, I'll see my reflection completely differently from one day to another. Depends on my mood. If I've eaten anything in a way that feels compulsive or against my better judgement. If I've exercised. If I had a sucky day at work. If I'm lonely. One day it might be, 'Damn, look at that! I've come a long way.' The next day, 'Jeez, a long way to go...' I've certainly had some concrete experiences along the way where my self image differs from the actuality of my body. Trying on clothes I think are near the right size only to swim in them. Go down a size... that can't possibly.... holy crap!... The same shirt that seems so tiny one day looks huge laid out over a chair the next. I'll turn sideways in tight hallways to let other people by when I don't need to anymore. People at work are commenting a lot, in a positive, supportive way, yet it feels weird to me. And I've had people not recognize me a lot in the last few months, mostly current and former co-workers I don't see very often. It's cool as a marker of change, but I'm also finding it pretty unsettling. 'But wait, it's just me. I'm right here. I was always here.' Being a person in flux can be a little uncomfortable at times it seems. | |||
| Weight Loss | Things you can do now... that you couldn't before you lost weight! | Oct 03 2007 16:42 (UTC) |
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| shrinking_caro, I bow in awe before your prowess. I have yet to achieve such an enlightened state. Not one fingertip of a kit kat would escape me.... But, to the topic. As others have said--the airplane thing, my god, what a relief to fit in the standard belt, be able to use the tray, and not feel I'm crowding other people. There are tons of other things, clothes, etc. But recently, I've discovered I can jog for a mile without stopping. I can hike up hill for several miles. This weekend I did a day long kayaking class, something I've always wanted to try. I got a little beat up getting in and out of the boat, but was such a cool feeling to be able to participate in something like that. | |||
| Weight Loss | WOOOO I'm no longer in danger of becoming a diabetic!!! | Jul 19 2007 04:05 (UTC) |
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| Oh, this made me so happy to read. Way to go! What a long way to come in a few months, congratulations! | |||
| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | Jun 15 2007 05:10 (UTC) |
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| 1heavenlybody,
Don't have an answer for you really, but I'm going to blather a bit anyway. I'm down 135 lbs with a few more to go, and yeah, there's some serious jiggle going on. (I've pondered at times whether my impressively mobile chicken wings couldn't be turned into some sort of deadly ninja weapon... I've also searched sports supply sites online for some kind of exercise girdle that will let me run without making plap, plap, plap noises. The best I've come up with is tight bike shorts. Why doesn't speedo or somebody make this item??? sigh.) There are lots of posts on the skin issue in the forums, and it just seems peoples' experiences differ. Go figure. Age, genetics, etc. But I'm not any unhappier with the aesthetics of my body after losing weight than before. And I'm much much happier with its functionality. I've decided I'll worry about whether I'll need surgery or not later. When I've maintained a comfortable weight for a good while. I guess my point is, why be afraid of this now? There are a lot of reasons to try and lose weight, and only part of that is aesthetic. I've also found, that part of the recipe that allowed me to lose weight was a growing acceptance of my body period. Right now I'm kind of intrigued by its transformation; sags, wrinkles and lumps included. I've actually toyed with the idea getting some reallly intimate nude photos taken. Not erotic necessarily, or a portrait, but just from a form/shape perspective. From a kind eye that's conscious of our society's rigid standards, but not totally taken in by them. I have no idea how to find this like-minded arty farty photographer though. Hmm, went off on a slight tangent there. Anyway, good luck to you. |
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| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | Jun 12 2007 04:18 (UTC) |
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| bump. what jakjak said. an excellent post. | |||
| Weight Loss | anyone start at 350+ could not walk & breath? Desperately need help b4 I die. | May 31 2007 04:59 (UTC) |
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| Woohoo! Biking! Water for pepsi switcheroo! Way to go! | |||
| Weight Loss | anyone start at 350+ could not walk & breath? Desperately need help b4 I die. | May 27 2007 20:36 (UTC) |
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| Leeci,
I can't quite say I've been where you're at. I'm a bit younger than you and am blessed with a donkey-stubborn constitution. But two years ago I was 344 lbs @ 5'7". (And I know I've been considerably heavier at times prior to that.) The fluttering heart walking up a small hill--oh yes. Pain in knees, feet--yup. I once strained by lower back rolling over in bed... I could drive my car with no hands... I'm at about 210-215 now. I feel like I could see the near side of 200 in the next few months, and it will be the first time since about 8th grade. But even if I never drop another pound, I feel so much better. I can do so much more. Others above have already covered the exercise part. Whatever you can do, a little bit at a time, until you can do a tiny little bit more at a time. That's really how it's done. Some people have success focusing only on diet and not excercise. That has not been my experience, for what it's worth. The two go hand in hand. The accomplishment of exercise motivates more careful eating for me. And though it's hard, I feel physically so much better, which also helps mood, which lessens mood-induced eating. If 100 feet makes you want to die, try 75 at first. One tip I have with food, that I haven't seen on this board before I don't think, is before even worrying about removing things from your diet, focus on adding something healthy. This worked for me several years ago when I lost about 50 pounds, and at the start of my current effort a few years ago. I just concentrated on getting one more serving of fruits or vegetables into my day. (At those times it may have been the only serving...) I think it just starts to retrain your mind on what is good food. And it lays a foundation for cutting back something else, because when you're ready to do that, you've got some filling food in your stomach which will make it easier. I'm guessing it also helps even out the mood effects of blood sugar yo-yoing caused by simple carbs (sugary stuff, white bread, etc). (Note, this is based on my dietary experience. I have no idea what yours is like, so if I'm making inaccurate assumptions, please forgive that.) If your husband won't walk with you, that's a shame, but don't let it stop you. One foot in front of the other. Get a dog. They will ALWAYS want to walk with you, and in fact will entice you out on days you feel like giving up, because they are beautiful souls and you won't want to disappoint them. (Sorry, waxing sentimental here! I love dogs and don't have one because I live alone now--too much alone time for a dog while I'm away at work and other things.) Make use of whatever resources you may have available: medical folks like docs, nutritionists, physical therapists or psychotherapists (which was huge help for me, incidentally) or a local community center with a thai chi class, or hell, a knitting class, whatever. That will help with the aloneness of it. Good luck to you sweetheart. |
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| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | May 25 2007 04:26 (UTC) |
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| Hey dtfrederick,
Just wanted to say Yay for water aerobics! Good for you! G |
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| Motivation | I'm too young to be so fat | Apr 23 2007 06:01 (UTC) |
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| Hi Jackie,
I'm not your age anymore (34 now), but at 18 I was about where you're at. It is a really hard place to be. You sound pretty well equipped to deal with this though; you sound smart and maybe ready to look at what's going on in your life. I'd say for the moment, assess your resources. This site is really helpful, but who's around in your life that can help? Did your doctor offer you any additional resources like nutrition counseling, etc? (And if he or she is just using scare tactics as a way to get you to change your behavior, and not offering any actual help, it might be to your advantage to switch doctors if that's a possibility for you.) Are you going to school? Are there counselors there that might be helpful? Etc. Just remember, you're not diabetic now, which is great. Some pretty small changes could make a lot of difference right now. A little walking. Cut one soda, or one cookie, or whatever out of your day. You'd be surprised. You don't have to shoot for the moon immediately. You know how cargo ships and airplanes can take miles to make a turn? This is like that. Just nudge the wheel a little bit. Take care, G |
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| Weight Loss | OK....Its official!!! | Apr 22 2007 01:24 (UTC) |
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| Yay!!!! Way to go! | |||
| Motivation | "Loving the skin you're in" challenge | Apr 19 2007 05:11 (UTC) |
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| chiyo, your chosen positive splurge may not be the same as someone else's, to each their own. but I think the point of the challenge is that it's not about the summer, tomorrow or yesterday; or about what state one's body might possibly be in at any of those times. It's about right now; purposefully, intentionally caring for this body/skin/heart/mind as it exists this very second. It's a powerful, very rewarding undertaking.
Oh, so for the challenge... hmmm. what shall i do.... I will rub some lotion into my poor shins this evening. I forget about them, and then they start pitifully flaking off. -G |
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| Foods | Have Scientists Ruined the Way We Eat? | Feb 03 2007 19:24 (UTC) |
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| Interesting, thanks for the link. I feel fully validated in my decision to buy some summer squash for dinner the other night based solely on my appraisal of it as, "So yellow and pretty." :-) | |||
| Motivation | very frustrated in Starbucks | Feb 03 2007 17:55 (UTC) |
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| Hee hee, BOGWATER.... that cracked me up.
You know as much as it irritates me when people/politicians want to censor/restrict media content because of what it might do to our fragile little minds (you know, we might end up masturbating or something--the horror!), I do think it's been helpful for my weight loss that I haven't been watching TV for a while. (I was too cheap to get the cable hooked up when I moved last year). All that deep brain stimulation by the oooey-gooey pizza adds or luscious looking ice cream commercials-- gone! (Godiva ice cream... the add narrated by some woman who sounded on the verge of orgasm... Talk about yer food porn.) Anyway, to stay on topic... oh coffee shops. My lover, my nemesis... I still have a nonfat, no whip mocha every morning. It will be the last thing to go out of my diet. And if I get to maintenance with it still there, it's never going! Never! Except of course if I go broke. I'm not addicted. What are you talking about, addicted? I double dipped yesterday. At least I picked a starbucks that was about a mile away and walked there and back. Was a break even day calorie-wise. Sigh. |
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| Weight Loss | 300+ Club? | Jan 27 2007 17:52 (UTC) |
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| You are not the only one by any stretch. Check out the Motivation forum. Here's one thread (of several) w/ plenty of solidarity :-) When I weighed in at the doc's office in july of 2005 I was at 344. (I'm also 5'7") I know I had been considerably above that as well, I just don't know the number. Good luck with your goals. Check out some of these summarization type posts that members have written over time, they can be quite helpful. -FFK (fellow fat chick) | |||
| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | Jan 22 2007 02:24 (UTC) |
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| Pam,
Just wanted to say: good going! Sounds like you're doing really well. I, for one, don't disagree on the sweets thing. I stayed almost totally away from them for about six months, which I think I needed to do in order for their sort of voodoo power to dissipate a bit. But then I found I could work them back into my diet. I just have to be careful and intentional about it. (No grabbing out of the M&M bowl at work for example.) For me, it also can't be part of any sort of self-reward system. I can't give it any more power than the brief pleasure of eating a sweet thing. Brief, but free of angst and guilt. If cloudy emotions are present, I try to save the treat for another day when I can truly enjoy it. (I still don't always manage it, but most of the time I do.) I'm just afraid of re-charging the old association between sweets and emotional pain. But I'm amazed I've gotten to a point where I can have chocolate in my cupboards and not touch it for a week. Though there are still times, like the last few days, where I feel I shouldn't have it around at home. Definitely still a work in progress. But anyway, congratulations. It's so nice to be under a 100 left to go. |
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| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | Jan 07 2007 22:31 (UTC) |
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| Hi safantasia,
I had your question in mind when I was at the gym today. (I go to a small neighborhood branch of YMCA) It's true I rarely see someone 300+ there. (sometimes some 250-ish folks, though) But I do see a whole range of body types, ages and fitness levels. Today there was an older, slightly timid looking woman in a wheel chair working out with the medicine ball which I thought very cool. I tried to make eye contact with her and smile, but she seemed kind of inward-turned. This is the first gym I've ever used that I've been at all comfortable in. It took some work--the repetition of going--to get to the level of comfort I'm at now, though. I'm still a bit phobic about using the area with the free weights. I'm kind of working my way over there via the nautilus equipment :-) I'd guess a lot of people, regardless of what they look like, but maybe aren't natural athletes, feel some apprehension at the gym. Perhaps it might be helpful, instead of ignoring the toned people, to try and be open to a nod or smile, and think about what their struggles might be. But you are right, it is definitely not an easy environment to be in at a large size. I've been there (heck, I'm still at 230) and know what you're talking about. It just depends if going is more important to you than the discomfort. (I like the structure of a gym visit myself, though I do walk, etc on other days as well.) Anyway, done rambling. Good luck! |
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| Motivation | Anyone lose 100lbs? | Jan 06 2007 02:47 (UTC) |
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| Yup. I hit the 100 mark in November. It was a really nice, giddy feeling. I don't have a prose essay in me at the moment, but the major factors in doing it were/are in chronological order of starting: Exercise: A very kind person who's an aerobics instructor took me by the hand and somehow talked me into coming to her class. I've had periods in the past where I got into a regular exercise habit, but always solitary activities, and the habit would drop off after a while. It was a revelation to exercise with a group and not have it be a horrible experience. That hit of aerobic activity reminded my body had good that felt, so I've continued doing classes, and a mix of other things ever since. Therapy: Had been depressed for a very long time. Landed with the right therapist at the right time, and she's taught an enormous amount about not being afraid of emotional stuff, and about listening to it seriously. Developed a meditation practice: really an outgrowth of the therapy that utilizes some of the same concepts (mindfulness, etc). The pracitce and philosophy (at least as I've encountered it in a western flavor) felt familiar and clicked for me. Gained an ability to care for my physical self in a way that I didn't have before. Had been a long long time since I'd gone to a dentist or doctor. The process of getting things like wisdom teeth taken care of, a stint in physical therapy for knee issues, etc, helped me relax a bit around the notion I had that my body was just disgusting. Changed my living situation. Nightime overeating stopped almost immediately after that. (Of course I still have the ill-advised snack every once in a while, or whatever, I'm meaning the habitual eating of something like an entire bag of pepperidge farm cookies at night.) So it's been a multi-threaded effort, and continues to evolve. Biggest thing learned; developing kindness and patience towards myself. That's really the crux of it. Best wishes, G |
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| Foods | Kitchen Staples - suggestions? | Jan 02 2007 06:58 (UTC) |
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| cupboards: whole wheat penne pasta trader joe's tomato basil marinara trader joe's multigrain crackers (or sometimes triscuits-original) canned diced tomatos (low sodium if I remember) basmati rice - have not been able to convert myself to brown rice almonds - tamari flavored usually decaf chai tea bags assorted bulk spices - esp. cumin, I seem to go through a lot of that a couple heads of garlic olive oil sesame oil red wine vinegar garlic powder-for when I don't feel like mincing the real deal often some kind of chocolate, broken up and re-wrapped in saran wrap beans, dried and/or canned. mostly black beans. Imagine vegetable stock. (Or sometimes make my own and freeze in an ice cube tray in the freezer.) a handful of clif bars (carrot cake flavor) - for those days when I get up too late to make breakfast. It's also my "emergency" food, in case the power goes out, or a volcano blows, or armed hooligans stage a seige of my apartment building, or that errant ice shelf makes its way around South America and crashes into Puget Sound, you know, whatever. It's more likely I will have gotten up too late to make breakfast...) freezer: a few trader joe's frozen pizzas (3 cheese) :-o. I try to only have these on days I've done an aerobics class 6" la tortilla factory wheat tortillas (I was pleasantly surprised to find that these will separate nicely when frozen. a minute or two under the broiler, and voila...) sprouted wheat bread (I like a brand called Healthy Way - tasty and chewy) edamame a few bags of some other frozen veggie: corn, peas, or lately, chunks of butternut squash containers of stuff I cooked on the weekend, like lentils (w/ tomato, cilantro, onion, garlic, etc) or some kind of soup. (One of my favs, creamy bok choy. Love this recipe.) morningstar breakfast sausage patties. (It's vegetarian faux sausage, but pretty good.) fridge: containers of low/non fat yogurt. I like Wallaby right now. Plain nonfat yogurt is good to have on hand for things like mashed potatoes, or anything that needs a little creaminess. lemon juice nonfat milk eggs unsalted butter (I've never warmed up to any sort of fake butter, so I use the real thing, just sparingly) fruits (usually apples and oranges. the occasional pear. maybe an avocado - love those as part of a breakfast sandwich/burrito) veggies (go through a lot of carrots for snacks. I like the bunch carrots with the tops still on 'em, though they make a mess when you cut them off at home) onion green onions are nice to have on hand some kind of fresh green veggie, often broccoli. nice green beans seem to be available right now. some kind of brick cheese. whatever looks yummy and is on sale. peanut butter |
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| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | Dec 06 2006 06:14 (UTC) |
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| welcome sasianu and janell!
I'm only a very occasional poster, so you probably won't see me around much, but just wanted to say welcome aboard. One of the most powerful things I've learned in the last year or so, and am still learning, has been to take care of myself. More than in just the common sense of get some exercise, eat less poo, etc; though those are good and necessary things. I mean actively taking care in the way you'd take care of a beloved person. If your best friend came to you mad at herself because she didn't work out for two weeks, or horrified that she ate a box of ding dongs, or worried she was disappointing people, how would you handle it? I'm guessing gently. Kindly. And with her best interests at heart. We just need to do the same for ourselves. (BTW, the ding dong example is pure fiction, created just for this post. Any resemblance to actual events in the poster's life are purely coincincidental... ;-) |
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| Motivation | 100+to lose...post here as you achieve mini goals!!! | Nov 28 2006 18:14 (UTC) |
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| Yay, United and ali! | |||
| Motivation | Mini Milestone ACHIEVED...pat me on the back please! | Nov 22 2006 21:21 (UTC) |
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| Good Going! Woo Hoo!
Somebody hunting through the racks at the Goodwill for something to wear to a job interview is going to be sooooo happy to find that suit... :-) |
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| Motivation | 100+to lose...post here as you achieve mini goals!!! | Nov 17 2006 04:54 (UTC) |
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| As of today's bi-weekly weigh in, I have less than a 100 to lose! Yay! I actually don't know if i'm going to shoot for the default target weight that CC picked for me, but regardless, it's sure nice to see that "left to go!" section on my account page under three digits. the psychology of decimal points is surprisingly potent. | |||
| Motivation | No need for any increased motivational factors....... | Nov 12 2006 04:03 (UTC) |
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| kitkat,
Sweetheart, I can feel the stinging pain from here, so first of all, consider yourself hugged. (If you're into that sort of thing... If not, imagine a sympathetic, decorous, soothingly dry-palmed handshake. ;-) But the questions you have in caps are legit ones. And at least to my mind, central. The existing and potential consequences aren't enough. Shouting them at yourself isn't apparently working. Whatever's pushing the eating is stronger than the motivation the consequences can provide. So perhaps turn your attention to the whatever? With the disclaimer that everyone's situation, preferences and experiences are different, and I don't know you or what you've tried and haven't; I'll just share that I've found psychotherapy to be so enormously helpful with this process. It's the best thing I've ever done for myself. We haven't even specifically worked on weight loss or food issues, yet the things I've learned from therapy about having/experiencing emotions, and other lifestyle/behavioral changes I was able to make with her support, made weight loss possible for me. What was the unclimbable gym rope of this issue became merely a steep hill ;-) I'm about halfway up the hill, so by all means, take my little speech for what it's worth to you. Best of wishes to you. |
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| Weight Loss | I looked that brownie right in the face... | Nov 08 2006 05:37 (UTC) |
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| I think these are my favorite kinds of posts. I mean, the updates on what people have lost are great and inspiring, but the habits that get you there are built one brownie and a time. I love the sense of triumph in these small but pivotal moments.
Anyway, Sqwish, good going! As well as anyone else who told a calorie dense foodstuff where to get off today. :-) |
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| Weight Loss | 4 things I've learned in my month here | Oct 20 2006 01:24 (UTC) |
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2 quick things; as I run out the door to an aerobics class:
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| Motivation | Limited To What I Can Do | Oct 19 2006 21:43 (UTC) |
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| I did physical therapy for quite a while last year. (Should still be doing it probably... oops...) It was just for some weenie knee/tendon issues, not serious back stuff. But I'd had to stop doing aerobics for a while and was worried about losing that much exercise. I was really surprised by the intensity of the stuff they gave me to do. It didn't look like much, leg raises and such, but I was sweating if I did the full set of stuff. And it kept me on the road in terms of increasing fitness/reducing size. I'd mention your concerns specific to weight loss to the PT, they'll probably have some ideas.
Good luck, hope your back and leg responds well to the treatment. |
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| Weight Loss | Scales... where can you find...? | Sep 23 2006 16:40 (UTC) |
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| Don't have an anwer for you, unfortunately. I suspect there may not be such a thing as a scale that will do the job for under 50$. Back when I was over 350, I tried several scales that should have gone up to 375 and they all gave wildy different readings. Didn't I read in one of your posts you had signed up with a gym? (Forgive me if I'm getting posts mixed up.) But most gyms have higher quality scales than what one would normally have at home. Does yours?
Another possibility might be, if you have a regular doc, and you like/are comfortable with him/her, just ask if you can pop in every once in a while and get weighed as a motivational tool? (They might have to charge you $$ out the ass, but maybe not. Doesn't hurt to ask.) I've also seen a lot of posts on this site advocating measuring a bell-weather body part, like waist or thigh or something, regularly instead of weighing. I've done that in the past, and it is just as satisfying, seeing those centimeters go down, as getting a pound reading. Just a few ideas. Good luck! |
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| Motivation | Don't wanna exercise | Sep 12 2006 21:19 (UTC) |
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| Tough one. I try to take a pilates class every sunday morning, and it's never easy to get myself there. I've found the best way to do it is to give myself the option of not going up until the last second. It feels like a silly little bit of mental trickery but it does seem to work. Like, well, if I'm going to go, I'd better get up now and have a little breakfast. So I eat breakfast and dink on the computer for a little bit. Then, well, if I'm going to go I should brush my teeth now. If I'm going to go, I should put on some shorts... If I'm going to go, I should put on some shoes.... Well, I'll just get in the car. I can always go get coffee instead... Turns out, if I'm in the car, wearing shorts and shoes (and presumably a top...), I'll most likely make it to the class. A little goofy, but whatever works, you know? :-) | |||
| Motivation | 100 to lose club - Everyday life, limitations and motivation | Aug 28 2006 04:55 (UTC) |
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| I had a little moment today that felt wonderful. I was driving on the freeway to visit my brother and eating a few crackers I had brought along so I wouldn't be STARVING later when we went to dinner. I dropped one of the crackers on the floor.
1. I could see it there, on the floor when I glanced down. 2. With suprising ease (which is good 'cause I was doing 70 mph...) I reached my arm between the steering wheel and my stomach, between my legs, and picked up the cracker before inevitably stepping on it and grinding it into the carpet. No way could I have done this a year ago. I would have had to undo my seatbelt, reach around the outside of my leg and feel around blindly on the floor while trying not to get in a wreck. (Or just deal with the cracker dust upon reaching the destination) There was a period of time 4 or 5 years ago when I could drive the car with my stomach. At least relatively straight drives; though I could steer some with a little hip action... If I'm ever a size where I don't have to ask an airline stewardess for a seatbelt extender, I believe I shall cry. |
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| Motivation | Welcome to the new over 100 to lose club! | Aug 23 2006 07:36 (UTC) |
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| kimne,
Welcome aboard! Just wanted to comment on this, because I've often wondered the same thing: "Has anyone else went to different grocery stores because they thought the cashier would remember they just bought a half gallon of ice cream the day before???" During my most intense bingey periods, I've done that in one evening during the same shopping trip; stop at one store for ice cream, another for brownies or whatever. It was an awful, awful feeling/state to be in. |
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