Posts by sunnybra

I got married 4 weeks ago, and despite everyone telling me that I must be gutted that it's over - no, no I'm not, I'm glad it all went to plan because I worked my ass off making it perfect but it's done and I'm happy.

Suggestion for the MIL - don't worry right now, arrange everything as if she's going to be there (not many (good) mothers will miss their sons wedding), don't not talk about the wedding in front of her but don't include her in the planning until she comes to you.  Just tell her that you both want her there, that you hope that she will be and that there will always be a place for her.

Although at the planning stage it seems that you need to plan for every eventuality for every person - on the day, if you have to move one place setting away - no big deal and no one will notice.

Just leave her be, at the moment she's getting the attention from her son that perhaps she is missing now but you need to come together with your soon to be husband, put on a united front and let her see that you are his priority now.

Good luck

Hi Jenn,

Thanks for the post, this was a very old one of mine but strange timing as my wedding is this Friday!

This is the first time I'd seen this post and have just sat here and read 6 pages waiting to find out what was going to happen!  Just wanted to send you some support, I know that you are doing the right thing and that after these difficut times and the heartbreak you are going to be just fine.  Things won't be worse than staying with that ass.

Stay strong. Xx

Perhaps he's at home now with a beer in his hand complaining to his guy friends that he met this girl he really liked but is embarrassed that he had a few too many and slept with her on the first night, she probably thinks he's a man whore and was only after what he could get, she probably hates him and is slagging him off to all of her friends right now, he can't believe she accepted him as a friend on Fb, he'll probably wait for her to message in case he makes the first move and just gets a load of abuse on his wall for using her that night........

Call him, mesage him, if he doesn't respond then there's your answer, what have you got to lose?  Delete his number and his friend request - end of.

p.s I slept with a guy on our first date, that was 3 years ago, I'm marrying him in 9 weeks. :o)

Good luck.

My OH is a bit of a snuggler too and I cannot fall asleep like that.  I had to just tell him.  We always have a hug together but generally for sleeping we face opposite directions which we now affectionately term "bum sex" (not rude!!) where we lie outwards with our bottoms touching.  :o)

Just tell the guy before you kill him.

Just because you are with someone it doesn't mean that you automatically stop being attracted to anyone else.  This is a crush and completely healthy, it only becomes a problem if you try to persue anything.

Some dream interpretations say that sexxual fantasies about anyone is more about a personality trait in that person that you feel is missing in your own relationship. 

Try fantasising in the day about your boyfriend, exchange explicit text messages while you are apart, moving in together is likely to to make this crush worse, my suggestion would be to get a new fantasy with your boyfriend, sex tends to get better as time goes on, take this security as an opportunity to push the boundries.

I went bowling with a group of friends almost 3 years ago, I didn't want to go - I'd chased my car that morning, but it was a friends birthday.  So I went, miserable face and all. 

There was this guy at the counter just changing his shoes, I'd met him on a few social occassions and really fancied him, I smiled and said Hi, told him about my bad day and he gave me the biggest hug, he didn't let me go all night, called the next day to arrange dinner on the Friday, I went despite knowing that he had a bit of a reputation, I left on the Monday, he moved in 8 weeks later and in 12 weeks time we get married.

There have been lots of points where I've thought "this is the guy for me", I called him 2 months into our relationship, I was out shopping, asked what he was up to and he said "nothing, just reading your cousins a story".  That was the first time that I knew I loved him.

Get it looked at every time, you can't under estimate things like that.  I haven't been through it myself but my SIL had a bad case of it, she was up taking cold baths 3 times a night in floods of tears, she was unable to breast feed my beautiful niece in the end but your health and quality of life with your new baby are the most important things.

Congratualtions BTW.

Reading this post I imediately jumped on the "that is discrimination" fence, then I started thinking about the safety aspect, if the plane is safe to a certain weight, and that is why we have a baggage allowance too, should they go by weight or should they go by number of seats as they do now?

What if everyone on the plane was 300lbs - how would that affect the planes performance?

But - making people pay per lb is only going to work if they stop boarding when the acceptable total weight is reached. To charge larger people more and not actually do anything different (ie, still have the same number of people on the plane) would be discriminatory.

It's usually 7 grams.

Duplicate.

I am on day 3 of my "beat my sugar addiction" mindset.  I haven't had any major cravings yet, although the more research I do the more I find things that will keep my sugar addiction fueled until I cut them out comepletely (sauces etc), so I don't think I'll ever have no sugar.  But I am avoiding completely chocolate, sweets, biscuits, cakes, sugar in coffee, soda, and so on, and also white bread, white rice, white potatoes etc.

My gripe at the moment - asphatame.  Doh.  I don't want sugar but I don't want chemicals either!

Thanks. 

Spoiled candy that website is great, with that one and a few others I have just put a shopping list together to go and buy ingredients on Saturday that I estimate to be around £50 / $80 that should make 28 main meals (14 each) and about 16 lunches (8 each), maybe more if I pad them out with more veggies. 

I'm excited about a good start.  :o)

I really do believe that you have to be happy and accepting of yourself before a) you expect someone else to be happy with you and accept you, and b) before you can offer happiness and acceptance to another person.

Being depressed is going to prevent you moving forward in any relationship but in my opinion you are looking for comfort and friendship with this man while you are going through a tough time yourself.

For most people the lack of sex or other physical intimacy is going to be a major problem, I'm not saying that it is imppossible to live like that but personally I don't see it.  You;ve been dating him for a year and not had sex in 7 months.......you don't live together........ how is this relationship any different to your other friends?

Question though - during the last year have you been physically attracted to anyone or even just felt horny alone?  If you have then I'd say get out of this relationship, if you go back to it in the future that's your choice but right now you aren't doing each other any favours staying together.  Is he happy without sex?

If you haven't had any sexual feelings at all (and I'm still presuming that you would have normally) then perhaps you ought to consider a counsellor or life coach or someone just to support you through your recovery from depression, if it is real depression then it's not a case of "snapping out of it" you need, and deserve some real help.

Just another 2 cents - Don't think about the "wrong career path" there's no such thing, you;ve qualified or trained for something.  We are no longer in the world where we leave college, get a job, stay there for 50 years and retire with a nice pension.  There's plenty of time for you to make a bit of money, retrain, do something else.  You are going to change so much over your life time, what you enjoy now isn't going to be what you enjoy in 10 years time, focus and get yourself on track now, even if you know you aren't going to be doing it for long, take advantage of what you can get from it.

Good luck and take care.

200kcal bakery muffins - lush!

Sift together 185g plain flour, 150g caster sugar, pinch of salt and a tablespoon of baking powder.

In a jug mix 85g of melted and cooled butter / margarine, 1 egg, a dash of vanilla extract and 200ml skimmed milk.

Make a well in the middle of the dry ingredients and add wet ingredients, stir to mix, do not beat or over mix.

Grease a muffin tray or line with paper muffin trays.

Fill each paper tray about half way up with mixture - these rise a lot and give a "muffin top".

Put in pre-heated oven at 180 deg c for 15 minutes. 

For a more indulgent muffin add 55g of cocoa powder to the dry ingredients or even better - mix some single cream with some cocoa powder, put some mixture into the paper trays, then some chocolate cream, then more mixture on the top.  The result - muffins with a liquidy chocolate centre.  Yum Yum Yum!!!  :o)