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| The Lounge | Heh, another relationship problem in line! | Jul 12 2007 18:12 (UTC) |
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| maybe you are like me and do not like commitments. Do not be like me; get married, have kids, and then decide this person is not right for you. That is my situation and I am sort of stuck in it. So, if the attraction is gone, I say move on. And by the way I was your age when I married. Now I am 23 and I want to be single again. Just think about it, and if you stay with him, how do you think it will affect you in the future. | |||
| The Lounge | What is your nationality? | Jul 11 2007 00:54 (UTC) |
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| African American | |||
| The Lounge | Favorite Song of the Moment | Jul 11 2007 00:54 (UTC) |
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| Pop Lock and Drop it - by Baby Huey
That song makes you want to dance. |
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| The Lounge | Mature topic - sex drive and hormones after baby?? | Jul 10 2007 22:15 (UTC) |
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| Very common. Sex is the last thing on my mind. Yesterday was my anniversary and I didn't even want sex. I guess my sex drive left out of the window after I had my 9 month old | |||
| The Lounge | Can Any Wives Relate???? | Jul 10 2007 22:00 (UTC) |
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| Do not feel bad. I still go through it. I am African American and my hubby is White. I like totally different food. I get so sad when he doesn't try it because I love to cook, and we have gotten into arguements over this subject. I had to make 2 different meals most of the time and now we try to limit that. My advice is to conpromise. And first off, you need to let him know how you feel. Being that you are newlweds remember to have a very clear communication. That is also something I need to learn, but while there is still hope for your marriage try it. If he hurts you in anyway, let him know right away. He will respect you and appreciate it. And also, if you keep it bottled up inside it is just going to make you lash out at him in the future about something minor so get it out. Just sit him down in private, and talk calmly, and explain how it made you feel. If he is a great guy like you said he is, he will understand. Good Luck | |||
| The Lounge | Mature topic - sex drive and hormones after baby?? | Jul 10 2007 21:52 (UTC) |
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| 2-3 times a week is alot to me. My husband and I don't even do that anymore. I am assuming that we are tired. I work part time and take care of 3 boys. You are just tired. I feel that it will come back. When your body is tired your hormones can change. I know when I am stressed sex is the last think on my mind. I have a great idea for you!
If it saddens him to hear what you have told him, just do what I did when I had postpartum. Go to a local library or book store, and get a book that explains about your situation. Sit him down, and read it with him. This will help you to get him to somewhat understand what you are going through is normal. This will also releive him in a way also. Good Luck |
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| The Lounge | 40's vs 20's - does age matter | Jul 10 2007 19:44 (UTC) |
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| Well, this is coming from a 23 year old female. I think that older women are sexy for they have experience and matturity. I think the older women look better then the younger ones on that show. Some may seem kind of desperate but a lot of people feel once they hit 40 ish they should be settled down, and obviously they are looking for love. I am not lesbian, but if I was a man I would definately go for older woman. Way more attractive then these young girls trying to find themselves. Oh yeah, I beleive I am one of those young females trying to find themselves. lol. | |||
| The Lounge | Mature topic - sex drive and hormones after baby?? | Jul 10 2007 19:39 (UTC) |
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| I am going through the same thing. Your sex drive will come back. You are just tired and don't realize it. I have 7 year old, 1 year old, and 9 month old. I haven't had sex in a long time. He want's it but I am to tired. After feeding, bathing, playing, yelling, and tucking in kids I have no energy for sex. I had very low sex drive. Way before we had sex like 3 times a day, sort of explains the back to back pregnancies. But I take a while to get aroused too, and it fustrates husband. I beleive it is just your body and hormones getting back into tune, and also you have a new big responsiblity in your life that takes more energy. Have hope. It will get better. Give it like 6 more months and explain to him your situation. Be carefull though, men seem to take these type of subjects offensive for he may feel it is something he is doing wrong. Just tell him that are tired because of toddler, even if you aren't and this may him understand a little more. Good Luck | |||
| The Lounge | My Anniversary..... and I don't care | Jul 10 2007 17:17 (UTC) |
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| oh, no more kids. I am here with them feeding, bathing, ect. ect. I love them to death, and everything I do it is for them "except talking to this guy online" but I guess I just needed some attention. I told this guy online which I know already, if my marriage does fail I am staying single until my sons are grown. And we do not talk about anything explicit or bad. I guess I never really relaized that marriage isn't fairytale. I think I watch too may soap operas. lol. Really, because I want to know what it feels like again to get butterflies, and wait for evening dates. I wouldn't mind doing that with husband but he is so boring. I do get out of the house. Sometimes, me and a friend in my same sitution go out different places and have girls night. But, I am so much younger then everyone around me. My husband is 30 so he is more settled. I am 23 and I would like to say that I am somewhat matture, but after posting this maybe others think different. I would like to thank all for insight. Even if some of the post were harsh, beleive me.......I am in the military, I can take harsh. And I appreciate honsty and bluntness. I really needed all the feedback and all of it has been great so far. Thanks | |||
| The Lounge | My Anniversary..... and I don't care | Jul 10 2007 16:42 (UTC) |
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| I bought him this nice dress shirt. He loves clothes and especialy dress shirts. I bought it for him when I went shopping the other day. I didn't get anything but I really don't care about gifts, I just wanted some time. Maybe sex, I don't know...........just something. But I got nothing | |||
| The Lounge | My Anniversary..... and I don't care | Jul 10 2007 16:34 (UTC) |
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| Thanks to everyone who responded. A lot of your post make me sit down and think about what I really need to do verses what I want. I love him, but I did get Married because I was pregnant. I had just joined the Military and I felt I was matture enough to handle marriage. He is a great guy, and did eventually fall in love but how could he just forget about me my feeling. He just remembered our Anniversary and still went to work. I understand he has to work, but no gift, no breakfast for us both before his shift start. I realize adventure is done after kids, but I do miss the single life. I need to realize the grass isn't always greener on the other side. I was pregnant 2 years straight, and now that I am not and a lot of men now find me attractive I think that is changing me alittle. I think I am feeling like I am missing something and I cant find it being married. I do not want to jump into another relationship. This actually my first relationship because I have always been scared of commitment. My 7 year old which I had in high school was by force "if you know what I mean", I was not sexually active nor in any relationships. I was traumatized for many years until I met my husband. We did get married and had 2 sons together. I am stuck in the house all day while he works. He coplains about me not having a full time job, but how when I have a 7, 1, and 9 month old? I know he is looking else where because I have found some proof he is looking, and I am not attracted to him anymore. But, the reason I married him is, we act like bestfriends. We joke around, we laugh together, I will do anything for him, and the same for me. I just do not think we should be in relationship. I think sometimes people are meant to be just bestfriends and not lovers. Oh gosh, I am a mess. Just thought I would explain myself a little. | |||
| Fitness | mp3 headphones | Jul 09 2007 20:02 (UTC) |
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| I use these ones called Gummies. They are a lot better and they stay in. I got them at Walmart for $9.99. They are sort of Gummy or rubby, so they form to the ear. I run with them and it works for me. Also sounds pretty good | |||
| Fitness | My 5k 'No need for speed' Story | Jul 09 2007 19:59 (UTC) |
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| I am avery slow runner. What makes it so bad is, I have to pass this mile and a half run in a short period of time for my Military fitness test. I used to dread running, but after I started doing it on my own I really enjoy it. And after reading your story it make me feel better because I figured I sucked majorly because I am not fast, but I can go the distance. I hope that this do not count agaisnt me when my test comes. It is also amazing that you are such a great runner and you have Asthma, I figure if you can do than I guess I can push a little harder as well. | |||
| Fitness | good running songs | Jul 09 2007 19:52 (UTC) |
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| Techno Music
Hard Rock One of my personal favorites is Awake by Godsmack, it get's the blood flowing. And Regeaton music helps for the fast pace also. |
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| The Lounge | I am depressed! | Jul 09 2007 05:04 (UTC) |
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| go out and have fun. Find a local club, get a mixed drink, and look at some other hot guys. I am not saying cheat, but looking will never hurt. It will take your depression away for a moment, and you'll have fun at the same time. Try it before you knock it. Have fun. | |||
| The Lounge | Burger King guy - Polling and thoughts | Jul 09 2007 05:01 (UTC) |
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| I am trying to figure out what is creepy about him. Nothing really scares me easily I guess, but he is funny to me. I do not get how he is creepy though. He is funny and annoying | |||
| The Lounge | Remedy for hangover? | Jul 09 2007 04:04 (UTC) |
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| one Asprin before you drink with full glass of water, and one after. Heard it on Oprah from Dr. Oz | |||
| The Lounge | Proper Discipline for Kids | Jul 07 2007 01:40 (UTC) |
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| Well, I do not lie to my kids. If you do not warn them about how the world is, they are going to be very disappointed when they find out on their own? Oh and by the way. What is up with you crazy people asking my do i hide my self during my period? Like I asked already, do you? Maybe you should. Anyway. How about this, come here and find out if I hide myself during that time of month. I will give you a real rude awakening. And while you are here maybe i will show you how I parent, and maybe you'll learn something | |||
| The Lounge | Proper Discipline for Kids | Jul 07 2007 01:23 (UTC) |
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| That is a really retarded question. Do you hide youself when you are on your period? Maybe you should, but I don't. But anyways, you raise your kids the way you want to and I will do that same. In about 10 years let's see who kids come out better. Because all 3 of my boys are going to be intelligent, educated, polite, and professional citizens. And damn straight, they all get spanked by me when needed. | |||
| The Lounge | Thinking about ending things with my boyfriend.... | Jul 07 2007 00:57 (UTC) |
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| there is no such thing as the perfect man. Everyone has flaws. Be happy that this is his only flaw. Let's say you break up with him, and then you meet some one who has a worse flaw then this. My hubby is sort a doormat too. I am strong, and opposites attract. What ever he lacks in which is smarts, that is where you complete him, he probably completes you in some way or fashion. So, if you love him, just except him for his "One Flaw" even though I agree it can be annoying, but just have his back | |||
| The Lounge | Proper Discipline for Kids | Jul 07 2007 00:50 (UTC) |
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| Well, being raised in a black family and being spank I turned out great. I am a good citizen and never been in any trouble, in the military, and I am good parent. People need to let kids know that they are not the boss. I tell my son, we are not friends. When you grow up, get the hell out, pay some bills, then we can be friends. Until that day comes I am the boss. If he can not take a little spanking from me, how is he going to take all the hard knocks life throws at him when he get's grown. I tell him all the time, life is not a nice place and what I do to him is nothing compared to what he will experience in the real world. He needs to get spanked a lot more then what he does because he get's away with murder. Not every child responds to time outs, and being grounded. All that is going to do is inconvience me. Just spank them and get it over with and then let them go play again. The most well behaved kids I know are spanked. And if you think spanking is wrong, read the bible. Spare the rod, you spoil the child. | |||
| The Lounge | Military Ladies | Jul 07 2007 00:41 (UTC) |
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| I am in the Air Force. I love to know that I am not the only Military woman here. That is the reason I joined the site, I need to stay in shape so i can stay in. I am at Travis AFB, California | |||
| The Lounge | music | Jul 07 2007 00:19 (UTC) |
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| Hardcore Rap and Rock. Anything to get the blood pumping. When I am relaxed I like smooth R&B | |||
| The Lounge | Proper Discipline for Kids | Jul 07 2007 00:17 (UTC) |
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| Depends ont he parents and it depends on the child. I have 3 boys and yes I spank. I do not beat or spank out of anger. I will only spank if it is serious. Like for example, I told my oldest son do not ride your bike in the street under any circumstances. I had explained to him that even though we are in a quiet neighborhood, some people drive crazy. Well needless to say, I caught him doing it and I sat him down and explained to him how he should not do it again. Second time came around. I scolded him. Third time came, I grounded him. I warned him that I was going to spank him if it happened again. Now fourth time came around so yeah, I swatted him on the butt 2 times. He hasn't been in the street sence. My middle son used to sock me in the face. Everyone around me told me to spank him. I never did. And then eventually I had to tap his hand so he would understand not to hit mommy. He hasn't hit me sence. Spanking is not abuse. If more parents spanked their kids, there would be less kids in Juvenile. My mother always said, spank youre kids or law enforcement will do it for you. But not all children require it, but some are hardheaded and it take a little bit more to catch their attention. | |||
| Fitness | Learn to Run method | Jul 05 2007 18:07 (UTC) |
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| It is so normal. I remember my first true running experience was worse. I joined the military and i never really ran a lot. I was made to run for miles a day and Oh My God, i thought I was going to die. So sore, didn't know how to control breathing, and being yelled at the same time was dramatic. it made me hate running and now but 3 years later I am now trying to like it. I have been trying it out On My Own for 8 weeks and beleive me it get's WAY better then what you'd imagine. Remember to breath in threw nose and out mouth and get into a rythme with your breathing. Do a steady pace. Remember also that everytime you run you are improving your endurance. So just because this happened to you yesterday, it does not mean that it will happen next week. All of my co-workers run a lot and for the soreness they say eat bananas. Something about them helps with the soreness. But first week sucks, do not get discouraged it will get better and after a while it will feel rejuvinating, and good luck. | |||
| Weight Loss | boyfriend problems + 4th of july = bingeing. | Jul 05 2007 17:57 (UTC) |
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| well, I guess everyone is different because when I am mad I can not eat at all but when you get mad go out. Get out of the house and go party. Not only will you feel good but you are not stuffing yourself either. And I bet boyfriend will get a good reality check. | |||
| Weight Loss | Anyone else have this? | Jul 05 2007 17:54 (UTC) |
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| the same thing happened to me. I have been working out and watching what I eat sence May. I have been measuring my self at least once a week. I do not measure any different but my pants are falling off my hips. And like you, my waist is the smallest part of my body and the measurement are the same but I need a belt now. I thought I was the only one in this situation. Guess not. I am going shopping also. good luck | |||
| Weight Loss | I can't stand people who say they can't drink water!! | Jul 05 2007 17:48 (UTC) |
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| I like water but I know a lot of people who don't. What I do is I buy them Crystal light. It is suger free and taste great and just 5 calories per serving. I know this is not equvalent to water but it is a start to get away from all the high frutose drinks and calories they have been drinking. Usually from there on they will start to drink plain water after they have ran out crystal light and have stocked up on water bottles. | |||
| The Lounge | inter-racial dating | Jul 03 2007 09:34 (UTC) |
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| Well I am Married to a white man and I am black. I have a Latino son from a high school fling and 2 white babies from my husband. None of our families ever questioned our motives and they totally agree with our marriage. Black guys get awfully offened. I am not going to lie, prior to meeting my husband I could not bare to see a white girl with a black guy but, after a while you learn not to notice color. Especially when your children are biracial. So in so many words, color doesn't matter because when you take off your skin we all look the same beneath. Opposites attract alot and if every one was the same it would not be fun, would it? So who cares what people say, only you opinon matters | |||
| The Lounge | i saw models LIVE | Jul 02 2007 20:56 (UTC) |
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| I just wanted to make a comment on the person who posted that others are jealous of skinny people. First of all, I have never and never will be jealous of a skinny girl. Me personally I do not want to be skinny at all. I much rather be muscular. I think beauty is in the eye of the beholder because I know if I was to get skinny my husband would be Very disapointed. It is a matter of opinion, and my opinion like most others say too skinny is unattractive. I find nothing wrong with naturally small people but there is a limit. Same with plus size women, there is nothing wrong with it but there is a limit. Escpecially if your health is at stake. The fashion industry is weird and I am so happy that Beyonce and Tyra banks aren't trying to change their beautiful figures for anyone. I do not agree with the "standards" of how a woman "sholud" look. I think women should feel beautiful no matter how her built is but just remember to stay healthy. | |||
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