skippy

Posts by skippyskippy


User's Posts | User's Topics

Forum Topic Date Replies
Motivation Small Losers Group - Only 10 to 20 pounds [left] to lose! Aug 19 2008
20:44 (UTC)
2
Hey! I've got about fifteen to twenty pounds to lose, but since I'm a tiny dude it makes a big difference.

I was around 100-110 pounds last summber, but I gained a lot of weight last year from COE and binging, and am just now starting to get back on track. I've been eating properly and exercising for the past week and a half and have lost around five pounds in water weight, so I'm pretty pleased. But this week I've started to fall off the wagon a bit with food so I thought I'd come back to CC to see (heh) if it'll help me stay with it. I don't actually count calories because of prior disordered eating drama but I do write down what I eat daily.

height: 5'0"
current weight: 130 lbs
goal weight: 115 lbs (that's reasonable, right? hoping for more muscle mass than fat, though)

Gonna go for a jog later to make up for the abysmal breakfast of this morning.
Weight Loss New 10-15 pound Weight Loss Group Aug 19 2008
20:35 (UTC)
150
Is this group still open for people to join?

(edit: oh wait, OP said that the deadline was March 26th '08. D'oh.)
Health & Support I-used-to-be-anorexic-but-now-I'm-a BINGER Support Group! Oct 21 2007
20:05 (UTC)
91
Oh yes. Thank you. I was anorexic for the past year or so, with my lowest weight at 84 at the beginning of the summer. I've been in recovery since then, gained up to 100 in a healthy way but now I've binged myself up to 125. Been binging every day for the past month, now, and it's only getting worse. I don't know what to do at this point, really. Just gotta keep trying, I guess.
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Oct 08 2007
06:18 (UTC)
376
I've been struggling with this for what seems like forever. I've gained so much weight and my stomach hurts all the time and I'm still never satisfied with anything. I'm always depressed and disgusted with myself. I feel like I'm giving up. Every binge just gets more and more and MORE. More food, more calories, more desperation, more numb. More gross aftereffects as well, but that may be too much information. I don't know.

Yeah. I should stop feeling sorry for myself and grow a pair and just try harder. But right now everything just feels so low. And it makes me want to binge even more.
Health & Support post your weirdest binge here. Oct 08 2007
06:12 (UTC)
29
If "weird" = "gross"...

Sugarfree vanilla pudding in water. That was embarrassing. And disgusting. I didn't eat more than three spoonfuls, but I didn't stop binging.

Very, very, very old chocolate. Like, noticeably so. I threw most of it out, but was still eating it while I walked it to the trash cans outside. Sad.

Black licorice. There was practically no food in the house except for my sister's old stash, and I was so desperate that I had a handful even though I HATE licorice.

Binging reduces me into a really pathetic person. I'm almost impressed, only not at all.
Foods gum! Oct 08 2007
06:04 (UTC)
1
Yeah, I've been wondering the same thing about why sugar-free gum has any calories at all, too. Not that it really matters, since it's only about five calories, but still.
Health & Support your favorite kind of question. Oct 06 2007
18:12 (UTC)
2
ha ha, thanks, all. I'll keep that in mind.

Can't forget the effect fiber has on flatulence, either. I'm so glad it's the weekend and I won't have to go out in public much.
Health & Support any other low-cal bingers? Oct 06 2007
16:22 (UTC)
1
Best you get a hold of it as soon as you can. I started off binging only on ridiculous quantities of fruit and yogurt. That was three weeks ago. Now it's ridiculous quantities of...well, anything I can get my hands on.

Good luck!
Health & Support post-binge post. Sep 28 2007
05:38 (UTC)
2
I kept on binging and crying all day today. I feel so fat. I went to the doctor's today and I was seven pounds up from last week. But after a lot of talking and tears, my doctor decided to have my parents make an appointment with a psychiatrist to discuss putting me on medication for depression. I know it won't make my problems go away, but I hope that it will help me help myself.

A day of good, normal eating for me (I haven't had one of those in so long...!):

Breakfast: a serving each of cereal, yogurt, fruit or a big bowl of oatmeal made with milk and with fruit. Sometimes I'll add some cinnamon or flaxseed or peanut butter.

Lunch: usually some kind of meat (usually roast beef or turkey slices or canned tuna) with vegetables (romaine lettuce, tomatoes, or bellpeppers) in a pita or a sandwich, or a big salad with chicken and egg whites. Sometimes a peanut butter and cinnamon sandwich with either sliced bananas, jam, or marmalade. Both on whole wheat/whole grain bread.  Either vegetables (usually carrot or celery sticks) or fruit on the side.

Snacks (usually mid-morning and afternoon): a serving or two of fruit with either yogurt, a glass of milk, or a handful of almonds. Or a Clif Bar.

Dinner: whatever my mother cooks, generally Asian/American fusion food. It's usually some combination of meat, vegetables, and brown rice. Sometimes pasta or noodles of some kind.

Occasional (at least, they USED to be) indulgences: dark chocolate, che (a Vietnamese sweet snack, I like mine with beans!), mint chocolate chip ice cream.

So it's not like I eat really unhealthily or anything; my normal diet is pretty balanced and I don't restrict myself too badly. In fact, usually when I binge I go for fruits and yogurt first, and it's only after those are gone that I head for the bread and the peanut butter and the chocolate syrup and the candy.

BUT I CAN DO THIS. I AM GOING TO DO THIS.

I am going to try to get involved in other activities and keep as busy as possible. I am going to stay after school every day until dinner time. I am going to try to walk or work out every day for at least ten to fifteen minutes. I am not going to stress myself out with things that I cannot help. I am not going put making other people happy over making myself happy. I am going to try to relax and keep up with my responsibilities at the same time. I am going to try not to focus so much on food. I am going to forgive myself if I fall, but I am not going to give up. I am going to eat as slowly as I can and enjoy what it is that I am eating. I am going to tell myself that I can do this today, not tomorrow. I am going to respect myself.

Thank you for all your kind words and support and advice.
Health & Support post-binge post. Sep 27 2007
17:37 (UTC)
7
I woke up two hours later and started binging again. I think I've really just given up on myself.

I'm already in therapy (went yesterday afternoon, in fact), but my parents let me have today off of school and later in afternoon I've got a doctor's appointment. I'm starting to think that I'm seriously, clinically depressed, though. I'm considering bringing up the possibility of taking medication for it, but I don't want my parents to assume I just want a quick fix, and they're also kind of traditional and don't trust the Western practice of taking pills for everything.

Thanks for your support and advice, though. I'm going to keep trucking on, no matter how tough it gets or how far I fall.
Health & Support Ramble before you binge... Sep 23 2007
23:34 (UTC)
6
So today's been going good so far. My breakfast was a bowl of Fiber One and fat-free yogurt and a chopped-up plum, with a midmorning snack of a small bowl of papaya and a tuna/hardboiled egg white/celery sandwich on whole wheat bread for lunch. Then I went for a brisk twenty minute walk outside and a moderate walk on the elliptical set on the highest resistance for another twenty minutes...then I had a glass of milk and a large banana. I'm not hungry right now, but hankering for an apple or a nectarine...should I let myself? I'm feeling myself making the excuse that it's okay since I did so well today and worked out and such, but I think I may just be sabotaging myself again. I think that's it. No. I'm not going to eat anything else. I'm going to brush my teeth and let things be until I get truly, honestly, genuinely hungry again. WILLPOWER.
Health & Support BEFORE YOU BINGE ... Sep 22 2007
15:49 (UTC)
20
Rubester:
I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes I'll find myself giving excuses to convince myself that it's okay to eat or to justify my binging, too. You know how it goes: "Oh, I didn't really eat that much today so a few more can't hurt," "My parents say I need to eat more anyways, it'll make them happy," "I've already overeaten today so what's a couple more going to do?" "I'm really full, but there's still food left and I shouldn't waste it..." Stuff like that. It's really shameful.
Health & Support BEFORE YOU BINGE ... Sep 22 2007
03:40 (UTC)
23
Had the worst binge of my life last night, woke up feeling like I never wanted to eat ever again...and then binged on pizza and bread sticks in the evening. I hate myself so much right now. I don't know why this has to be so hard.

The frustrating thing is that it would be so much easier for me not to binge if I could just ...not have to focus so much on my food all the time and if I were just allowed to eat what I wanted. But as a recovering (in my opinion, recovered, past tense, what with the ridiculous amount of food that I consume now) restrictor, my parents are constantly critical of what I eat or don't eat. So half of the time I eat just to make them happy so they don't make me unhappy, and...here I am. I've been so ashamed of my binging that I haven't even told them how much I've been eating, so when I try to eat less or even just get out of the house to avoid being tempted they get upset at me. They're already really frustrated with having had to deal with when I wouldn't eat enough, and now they're just really annoyed that I've managed to screw myself up into the opposite eating disorder. I don't know what to do. My stomach hurts and I hate myself and my body and this is such a struggle. And yet I still want to eat.

I'm so tired of this.
Health & Support need encouragement :( Sep 22 2007
01:34 (UTC)
8
Same here. I thought it was going to stop a month ago and now here I am and the binging's worse than ever. I do the exact same thing with the "tonight I'll binge while I can because tomorrow I have to go back to eating less and losing fat" kind of mindset, too. And you're right, it so completely does not work. At all.

I'd like to be a part of that group, if you don't mind.I need all the help that I can get, and if I can give some in the meantime, all's the better.
Health & Support need encouragement :( Sep 21 2007
15:35 (UTC)
11
Same same same. After only three days of semi-non-binging, I had the worst relapse yesterday, too. I don't really know what to say to help, as I'm struggling (oh, is it ever a struggle) with my monsters, too, but you're not alone in this. The only thing to do is keep trying, I suppose. Best of luck.
Health & Support BEFORE YOU BINGE ... Sep 19 2007
05:26 (UTC)
35
Yesterday was a good no-binge day for me, and today I did all right, I suppose (ate more at dinner than I really needed to and had an extra unplanned pear and half an apple, but not a binge in that I felt out of control or was eating for emotional reasons and was within my maintenance alories for the day). I'm feeling pretty good about myself so far...only the rest of my life to go, ha ha.

However, I have put on a layer of binge blubber over the past month or so. Without dieting or eating to lose weight (my parents and doctors won't let me), can I eat a normal number of calories (1600-2000) with moderate (low intensity, but consistent) exercise and lose it?

Glad to see so many doing so well, and good luck!
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Sep 17 2007
06:49 (UTC)
412
Congratulations, I'm glad you've been doing so well. Jealous, though, too, to be honest. I had the worst worst worst weekend. But tomorrow it's back on the bicycle (I don't really like horses, they're too tall! Bikes are less likely to bite).
Health & Support BEFORE YOU BINGE ... Sep 16 2007
16:58 (UTC)
58
Yesterday was terrible. Today I thought maybe I would get ahead of my binging by allowing myself a bowl of Peanut Butter Captain Crunch (which I practically begged my dad to throw out a few days ago) for breakfast, but then I had two more and now all I want to do is just eat and eat and eat. My "all or nothing" mindset is telling me to throw the day away and just give in, but I know it's just going to make things worse. I know this, and yet I still want to, and I don't know if that want is stronger than my willpower.

And...it's even worse when you're a recovering anorexic and in a lot of ways still have that "if I touch food I'm going to gain 10000 pounds" mindset but have had to eat way more than you're comfortable with (and what a normal person would be comfortable with) to regain health and weight, so your body then gets used to you eating massive amounts of food when you're not even hungry and can't tell you when to stop when you're satisfied anymore and none of your parents or doctors take you seriously and even enable or encourage you to eat more and you even convince yourself that it's okay so when that binge comes a-knockin'... you're royally, totally, completely screwed.

I know I keep saying the same things over and over all the time but that's because the same things keep happening over and over all the time. Every day is turning out to be "tomorrow I'll do better," and I'm getting so tired of it all. I feel fat and stupid and miserable, and I still have a ridiculous amount of homework to do that I can't focus on because of how awful I feel about myself and this binging.
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Sep 15 2007
16:57 (UTC)
414
ha ha, my name's actually Christian, "Skipper" or "Skippy" 's just a nickname.

My parents think the exact same thing, though they're afraid to let me eat less because they think that I'm going to fall back into my restrictive eating habits and end up back in the hospital (because while binging is sheer torture on me mentally, my parents don't think is as dangerous since I'm not purging and the only physical side affect is fat/weight gain, really.) They're already really frustrated having had to deal with my previous disordered eating, and don't understand why or how I've managed to dig myself into a bigger hole with binging and they're really frankly quite tired of it all. Which isn't to say that they're not supportive, and I understand that they're really stressed out and that they've got work and other kids in the family to look after and can't spend 24/7 making sure that I eat properly and so on and so forth. Also, I don't want to be so dependent on others, I want to be able to be healthy and happy on my own!

It's just really hard, though. I wish I could just NOT think about food all the time, it's depressing how much time and though and energy that I put into stressing about what I will eat/what I am eating/what I'm going to eat/what I might eat/what I could eat/what I should eat/what I shouldn't eat/what others are eating ALL THE TIME. I'm trying hard to distract myself, but food is everywhere, everyday and my own body is another constant reminder. What I would give to have a normal relationship with myself and my food.

But I need to be more optimistic and confident in myself...My plan is to spend as little time as possible in the house after school (staying to do homework in the library, going to the park, walking to a friend's house, etc), keep up with therapy and writing things and thoughts down, consistently exercising, and finding other ways to distract/occupy myself. Take things day by day.

Thank you for sharing your story and advice with me, and good luck to you, too!
Health & Support Any Binging Anorexics Out there?? Sep 15 2007
16:29 (UTC)
9
That's been me for the past three weeks, minus the abusive mother (for which you have my sympathies -- I get upset and frustrated with my parents often when dealing with food, but they're at least supportive of me. Is there anyone you can talk to about her? A teacher or a counselor or a doctor or something?)... I started off small on the binging at first but it's gotten worse over the past couple of weeks with my problems with stress and depression, and I've gained FAT but not that much WEIGHT so I still have to eat according to the upped meal plan that my doctors and parents have for me (on top of the binging!), which just kind of stresses me out even more.

I don't have much advice to give, since I'm in the middle of struggling to kick the habit myself, but I wanted to let you know that you're not alone! It's a hard and painful process trying to get through it, but binging is worse.

And although gaining five or even more pounds would probably be okay for you, at your height, it should be done in a healthy way that makes you feel good about yourself. Whatever happens, though, keep trucking on!
Health & Support BEFORE YOU BINGE ... Sep 15 2007
16:14 (UTC)
63
Same here! What a great idea.  I suspect that I will frequent this particular thread often, but anything to kick this binging!
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Sep 14 2007
15:33 (UTC)
416
After a good dinner and half a mango and a considerable amount of watermelon, I went to bed wanting more but feeling determined that I would show a bit of willpower, but woke up in the middle of the night and ended up in the kitchen just eating and eating. I thought it'd be okay, since it was just watermelon, but "just watermelon" turned into watermelon, three bananas, the other half of the mango, and a small container of low-fat yogurt (which was 250 calories! WHAT.). At least it was all healthy food, but still. I've NEVER had a midnight binge before, and it's just proving what I've really been fearing -- that my binging is escalating and that I'll never be able to stop myself.
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Sep 14 2007
01:08 (UTC)
417
I've just had a mini-binge right now, of two bananas and five figs. I know it's really not that much (puts me at maybe ~1000 calories as of right now, but I still have dinner left to go), but I'm counting it as a binge because I really could've not, since I wasn't hungry at all and just kind of wanted to eat for the sake of eating. Yesterday was good, though. Hopefully I can keep this up.
Health & Support This goes out to all bingers Sep 12 2007
15:15 (UTC)
11
Yeah, same here, I'm still living with my parents and family, too. And we actually don't have that much unhealthy food in the house. I often just binge on ridiculous amounts of fruit, which makes it hard for people to take me seriously, because, well. Fruit. There could be worse things to binge on. But the calories add up and now it's started to escalate to bread and peanut butter and cereal and chocolate and stuff.
Also, my parents frown on throwing out food and I hate waste, too. I always feel so guilty throwing perfectly edible food out...but you're right, better in the trash than in me.

Thanks for your supportive words, though. And I didn't even think about listing foods being a trigger for some people; if I binge again (here's hoping not, though), I'll try to be more considerate and I won't mention 'em.
Health & Support This goes out to all bingers Sep 12 2007
00:52 (UTC)
15
Same here. I was so ready for today to be a fresh start for me, but when I got home from school this afternoon, I ate a plum and a banana as a snack, and then somehow convinced myself along the way that two more plums, another banana, a cup of vanilla yogurt,  two slices of toast with peanut butter and marmalade, and a piece of baguette with chocolate syrup was okay, too. I don't even know if I'm done there, if I'm going to eat more later, too. I still have to eat dinner, too. (My parents won't let me skip meals, even if they know I binge like crazy in the afternoon).

My binges have slowly been getting worse and worse over the past three weeks. Binging once in a while with a normal calorie diet would be okay, but I've been binging constantly on an  increased meal plan as it is. It's like... since I'm not able/allowed to control how little I eat, I compensate by overeating instead. Except I'm not really in control and it ends up just stressing me out more and making me hate myself for how unhealthy and unhappy and unfit and fat I'm getting.

I know I've gained five to seven pounds at least and a depressing amount of fat all over. It's starting to show. I can feel it on my face, on my stomach, on my legs, even in my fingers. I just wish I could eat normally and not think about food all the time and be HAPPY with myself.

I know I've got it in me to kick this, but... apparently not today.
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Sep 11 2007
14:46 (UTC)
423
...Guess what I did after my post before going to bed? I ate a Clif Bar. That, my friends, is sad.

I woke up this morning feeling so tired of everything. but I'm determined that today will be a better day.

[edit:] on the bright side, I think I've made the 1000th post on this topic. Cool.
Health & Support ~~Bingers Anonymous~~ Sep 11 2007
06:52 (UTC)
425
hello.

My "long story short" about my situation turned out to be still pretty damn long, so I'll just forgo the standard introductory history and jump right into the bingery, so forgive me if this is rather disjointed and rambly.

I'm recovering from malnutrition due to dumb dieting (borderline-anorexia), was fine on my meal plan of ~2000--2500 calories a day of healthy foods (very nutritionally well-balanced and I wasn't depriving myself and had no cravings for anything at all) until about three weeks ago, when the binging started. It began with overeating just fruits until last week, when it turned into granola bars and doughnuts and ice cream and yogurt and cereal, on TOP of the fruit and meal plan.

Today started out all right, with me eating maybe ~1500 calories worth of breakfast, lunch, snack, and dinner, until the [insert ominous theme music of choice]:

- fifteen small to medium sized figs
- three bananas
- a banana-berry yogurt smoothie
- two chocolate pudding cups
- a bowl of cereal (Kashi Organic Promise Strawberry Fields, if anyone cares) and milk
- a Nature Valley peanut butter granola bar
- four slices of bread with peanut butter and marmalade

(...I have a sweet tooth, yeah. If only I could get it yanked by the dentist.)

Tonight it's gotten to that scary point where I've eaten so much that I've  given up on feeling guilty about it all, even. Just been eating and eating and eating.

...My parents and doctors at my outpatient eating disorder clinic don't really take me seriously because I'm still on the low side of a normal weight (even though I don't look like it and my body fat percentage is plenty) and because before I was binging on mostly healthy stuff. But I hate my lack of willpower and how weak and unhappy and unhealthy and disgusting it makes me feel. My relationship with food is bad enough to begin with, and adding more disordered eating to the mix ain't exactly helping much. And it's worse because I'm not even allowed to exercise much, so I can't work it off. I've gained about five pounds in the past two weeks of binging, which doesn't seem like that much but I'm VERY short and small-framed for my age and it's showing in my legs and on my tummy. I've still got some muscle going on, but everything on top of that is all... soft and squishy.

I know a lot of it is due to stress and depression, and I'm trying hard to stay positive and keep trying and distracting myself from seeking comfort in food and eating, but today? Really, really discouraging. I could use a bit of support if anyone's got some to spare. Thanks.
Health & Support Transgender issues. Jun 20 2007
19:19 (UTC)
13
!

I'm also a sixteen-year-old guy, out to my family and most of my close friends, but nowhere near as far along as you (my parents won't greenlight T or chest surgery and I'm a minor still).

Thanks for this topic, and props to you, man. I'm so glad to see this thread here, especially on this site, since right now I'm struggling with kicking an accidental eating disorder due to my issues with gender dysphoria/body image. So...story time, kids! If you don't mind me going on and on about myself for a moment, that is.

'Bout six months or so ago, I started trying to eat healthier and exercise more in an effort to lose weight (stupid hips and butt and thighs! >:|), but it started to get away from me and before I knew it, I'd lost too much weight much too fast. But a few months ago I wisened up a bit and started increasing my intake (~1200-1400 calories a day, which I thought was reasonable since I'd stopped working out and was pretty much sedentary) and thought I was doing pretty well for a while.
Unfortunately, at a check-up with my doctor two weeks ago, I found out that the family scale was off by almost ten pounds too much so I was rather alarmingly underweight instead of on the low side of normal as I thought I was. I was also told that my heart rate and blood pressure was dangerously low, and so spent the past week and a half in the hospital's eating disorder clinic.
Just got back home a few days ago after regaining a better amount of weight without too much difficulty, and my HR and BP is pretty much stable now, but I still want to be careful. What sort of foods should I be eating/avoid to keep my heart as healthy as possible?
[edit:] Also, I'd lost my period for about four months now, and my doctor says I'll know that I'm really safe and stable when I get it back (which kind of really sucks for me, but it's better than being sick). Anyone know what I can do to help it along?

 Any advice would be great, thanks.
Join Calorie Count - it's easy and free!
CREATE FREE ACCOUNT
Advertisement
Advertisement
Why Create an Account?

So you can log your weight -- which allows you to do the following:
  1. Plot your weight curve
  2. Analyze the trend of your weight (see under Recent in the figure above)
  3. Determine the projected target date (see under Overall in the figure above)