Posts by cats-eyes

Essential: intelligence, kindness, sensitivity, humour, sense of purpose in life, attractive (to me) looks, emotional stability, trustworthiness, self-respect

Would prefer: sociable, good taste, common interests, arty, literary or musical, liberal views, blue/green eyes,  tall, healthy weight, own teeth and hair, financially independent (not rich just can help pay the bills), vegetarian and animal lover, creative

Not so keen on: facial hair, shaved head, smoking, obsession with appearance, commitment phobia, super conventional attitudes, narrow experience of life, religion

Can't deal with: fanatical religious or extreme political beliefs, arrogance, unreliability (and the obvious stuff like being a serial killer, etc)

I think it's possible to examine your childhood critically without feeling that you're blaming your parents for everything or failing to take responsibility for your problems. My parents were wonderful, loving people who, like everyone else, made a few mistakes. Those mistakes have helped shape who I am today, just as all the caring things they did have too. I don't think I'm being "ungrateful" by talking through these things with a therapist - that's too simplistic. For me, understanding my past is an essential part of changing my future.

Original Post by gi-jane:

It's a nice idea and a great excuse for all the boozers out there.   However, speaking as someone that used to have a glass or two (or three) of wine at home regularly I can tell you that cutting it right back to a glass or two a week really helped me to lose weight.  It's not just the calories or the effect or the metabolism... it's the loss of willpower and accompanying munchies that make things worse than they could be.  I'm sure others will confirm that.

 absolutely....after the second drink it's harder to care, and after another one I can't focus long enough to count calories anyway.

definitely.... my larger friends can make me feel good when they call me 'a stick' (I am so not a stick, but it's all relative!)  On the other hand, I feel much bigger when I'm with my skinny sister and sister-in-law....

I can totally relate, as the same thing happened to me on Saturday! Like you, I'm not a regular binge drinker and have recently stopped drinking altogether to lose weight. But that night I went to a party, was craving a glass of wine, and just got totally carried away. I also hadn't eaten much and done a hard workout, so the alcohol went straight to my head.  I woke up with no memory of what happened, but was apparently sick in my friend's garden, smoked a cigarette (yuck!) and did something else that's too embarrassing to share here.  I felt so ashamed because I'm in my 30s and haven't been that drunk for at least 10 years!

Anyway, it sounds to me like you're doing all the right things, getting plenty of water, eating healthily, etc, and as lala says, if it was just a one-off, it probably hasn't done too much harm. I'm sure the bad feelings will wear off in time and you can put it behind you.  As for giving up alcohol, one of my friends did this because alcohol was making her feel aggressive and out of control. She feels much better now she is teetotal. Though personally I'm going to try drinking moderate amounts on a regular basis, instead of depriving myself until I'm driven to binge drink.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do :)

I think having to maintain that level of restriction for the rest of my life would cause me so much stress and misery I'd look about 90....

Around my upper body...I can see my ribs at 140lbs.

A bowl of oatmeal followed by two grilled Quorn sausages, sometimes with a bit of grilled mushroom or tomato - about 350 calories.

Best: eat a proper breakfsat and lunch so you're not starving by the evening

Worst: Going vegetarian will automatically make you skinny

slightly off topic, but I've found that taking a magnesium supplement can help reduce the cravings for chocolate I get around that time.

hmm, I'm a seriously fast oxidiser, which means I should be eating a lot of red meat - but I'm vegetarian! I wonder if that's why I get tired and hungry a lot, and crave high-protein foods? 

Love my fiance

Love my family

Love cats (especially my own)

Hate looking for work

Hate being on medication for my anxiety

Hate the inequalities in the world

I wouldn't go there out of choice because it's not ideal for vegetarians (I'm in the UK) but if I was part of a group eating out, I wouldn't object on principle. I occasionally go to Burger King for a veggie burger.

Trying not to eat cheese or drink wine as these are my main downfalls...

I've always done this too!

I get very anxious about people making comments or drawing attention to what/how much I'm eating. Even if it's just a joke, I still find it embarrassing for some reason.