Posts by oomboo2

Hello everyone.

I'm on the laptop at the hospital right now. I was transferred here because I wasn't eating. I completely flipped out when I got to residential. 2 of the girls had bmis below 12 (which freaked me out)

I'm probably going to go back soon. Wish me luck.

You could try probiotics, reglin, etc. Talk to your doctor. Also, if you dieted to get to your low weight, please try to gain it back. If you are naturally thin, thn yo should be fine.

I'm aware that at this point, I have no choice but to give it a try. I'm just terrified of memories. I have such awful flashbacks from the places I have been to so far. There are songs that make me flip out because they were always on when I was IP, shows I can no longer watch, books I can no longer read, activities I can no longer do, etc.

"Your poor parents must be at their wits' end to see their beautiful baby daughter in such a terrible emaciated and depressed state.   My heart goes out to them it really does.  They must love you so much to drive you for 4 days to get help.  I'm really glad you have no say in the matter because it sounds like Tucson is all that's standing between you and the pearly gates....................Go hug your parents."

gi-jane: A. I'm not emaciated B. My mother yelled at me for hours because I refused to take a plane. She chose to drive to Mirasol because there is a children's illness fund in NJ that will cover the cost, so she doesn't want to go anywhere else. Shes not driving because she loves me. Shes driving more or less to save money. C. I would never kill myself. I'd go to hell, and I'm smart enough to know that hell would be worse than this. Also, I'm not denying I need to go IP. I wanted to go to a place called Moonridge, which is more centered around cutting and depression (and does not have a bunch of emaciated anorexics, which is the hardest part for me) I actually REALLY REALLY wanted to go there. But my mother only wants to go to Mirasol. D. I'm not going to hug those who have caused me this much pain. And I don't just mean putting me in residential. You really cannot judge them when you don't know some of the things that they've done. I'm sorry. I know you were trying to be helpful, but it was just...incorrect.

Also, I would prefer a normal psych unit to an ED place. I've been in places like that. Out of the 5 hospitals stays I've had, the one at the psych ward was the best. Its like... they aren't "normal", but they're normal in ways that I'm not. Which helps.

Edit: I realized this post seams very defensive. I apologize. I'm fully aware that I am f***ed up and need help. I'm just... well... f***ed up, so I act like this. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Spek, I'm honestly scared for you. I have had MULTIPLE friends have organ failure due to being underweight when they A LOT better off than you.

Unless you are prepared to stop all exercise and work your way u to 3000 caloies within the next 2 weeks, you need to be hospitalized.

I don't know abut many places in Australia, but you could try Northside Clinic, NSW Australia. Its pretty goo, they treat you like a competant adult, while getting you the help you need. Message me.

Studies have been done that show that the use of antidepressants (specifically prozac and zoloft) do not increase the chance of an ED patient maintaining their weight after hospital discharge. The reason some people gain weight is that appetite increases, but the meds do not actually cause and sort of change in one's metabolism.

I personally am not a fan of meds, but then again, I have had really bad experiences with them. At one inpateint hospital, they put everyone on really heavy doses of tranquilizers in order to keep the unit calm and quite. I had adavant, ceraquil, and thorzine pumed into my arm (I refused to take it by mouth) everyday. I was so exhausted that I could hardly walk straight. And also, high doses of anti-anxiety meds can lower your blood pressure. Mine dropped to below 60/40 and I kept passing out. I was also misdiagnosed with bipolar (i was just depressed, never had any manic spells ever), and was given abilify, which screwed me up a bit.

But, if used correctly, they can be helpful. I woud make sure to get a second opinion on what meds to take, just to be sure that you are taking the right ones.

You won't simoultaneously get rid of fat and gain muscle. What typically occurs is that you gain muscle from lifting, and then your metabolism speeds up from the etra muscle, so you lose fat.

I don't think you can really say that  my nightmares are "definitely the demons that caused [my] ED" when you have no idea what they're about.

I'm sorry. I shouldn't have posted it when I don't feel that I can share the details wih you guys, but I can tell you that journaling is closer to the problem than it is to the answer.

Ignore me. I'm a loser.

Chances are that you will need close to double that in order to reach a healthy weight. (you don't need to get up that high immediately, just eventually). I know someone who was basically the exact same weight as you when she entered IP. After being IP 9 weeks, she was still the thinest person (by far) and she was also the person on the highest calorie level. Typically, the more weight you have to gain, the longer your metabolism continues to increase. At least in my experience.

Carmen, I'm going to be completely honest with you.

I think that you keep making more topics because you're waiting to hear exactly what you want. I don't know exactly what that is. (People telling you that you look great? People telling you that you can excerice to make up for the calories? Someone giving you scientific evidence that is you eat 200 calories you wil immediately lose weight? I really don't really know.)  The thing is, no matter how many times you post the same question, no one's reply is going to change.

What I think you really need to do is get a doctor, or if you can't for some reason, find a free support grop in your area run by people who specialize in EDs. That way, you will have some professional guidance.

Also, please do not attack figdet84. Yes, everything he/she days is not nice, and not all of it is true, but he/she has a right to be frustrated with these posts. I believe that quite a few people are.

I think that A. You definitely have abs and B. You are freakin gorgeous. You seriously have no idea how jealous I am of you. I feel like I'm so fat when I look a your pictures, even though we are about the same size.

indian4071, ensure plus is definitely a great option for you. Its liquid, so obviously, no chewing involved. And its completely balanced, so you can be on an all-ensure diet if necsary.

I find it very hard to belive that you look luke you weigh more than your mother. I looked at your pictures and you look like your about 112. And it does not look like you have a high % bf either. Also, judging from your journal entry along with what you've said in this thread, I think that you may have some mild BDD (body dysmorphic disorder)

But tht being said, you are on the right track with maintaining at 1800 calories.

A lot of things can contribute to blood pressure. If you are dehydrated, or haven't eaten in a long time, it will be low.

Also, many people who are medically compromised have low bp.

Yes, yours is a bit low, but it could be perfectly normal for you. My blood pressure is usually around 90/60. But then again, I think its largely due to my ED.

lalabanana- I'm so sorry. That must be absolutely awful.

If you are seriously considering IP, I know of several very good places. I've researched so much about them. Also, just from meeting so many people in hospitals, I've learned of a lot of places from them. I've met even more people online. What state do you live in? I could recomend some places.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=8335153 005

^Its a great group with tons of reviews for tons of places.

I really dont think that is very accurate. There are several pictures that seem to be way off.