Posts by danasings

alexwilliams - 22 DAYS, that's FANTASTIC!!

I haven't been on here in a long time...and I'm struggling pretty badly. I've contracted some sort of mutant outer ear infection that seems to have been (up to this point) resistant to every antibiotic ever sprouted. So after waiting almost a week for approval from my insurance company to see a specialist (all the while I've been getting worse), yesterday I finally went and saw an ENT doctor. He's told me to stay home from work & rest.  But I tried that almost all of last week, so I HAD to work yesterday & this morning just to dig out from under the pile of crap. Add to that how STRESSFUL my job is (I work for a company that is understaffed by about 6 people - so 4 of us end up doing the workload of ten), and I've not been doing well. My workouts, once regular and butt-kicking, are now sporadic and feeble. I'm feeling like a weak, puffy slug.

I did go for six days without b/p, but today I did eat something bad and brought it back up again. This s*cks. I feel like I have no control over anything, and now I'm not even able to exercise (which has been my saving grace since November 2007).

Thanks for reading, everyone. I'll get back on track soon, I know...but being sick and not getting better in the self-imposed allotted time frame causes me even more stress. (More stress = not what I need right now.) And my goal of 149 lbs by the time I leave for Hawaii on May 8 is quickly becoming a sad, bent little pipe dream... *sigh*

rampantbunnylove - Are you still with your family? When are you going to be back in your routine? You may find it easier to resist when you're back to your own space...

But I'm right there with you. Had two days of b/p...felt truly awful last night about it, but decided that two days was enough this time. I'm even finding my "enthusiasm" waning for my routine of hiding food and stuffing my face with it when I'm alone. (That's quite a run-on sentence...sorry!)

But I got up this morning, worked out for 75 minutes (most of my workouts consist of Biggest Loser workout DVDs, they are FABULOUS!), ate a healthy breakfast with my husband, and logged on to check in with everyone here.

Everyone who's sticking to it - GREAT JOB!! sharonclaire, thanks for giving us all so much support - you're wonderful!

Days without bingeing - 1 (today!)

rampantbunnylove - several years ago I tried a new type of therapy called EMDR. Here's a description:

http://www.emdr.com/briefdes.htm

Unfortunately, my insurance ran out at about my fifth session. (Gotta love that, right?) So I can't claim anything like "it worked so well for me!" or the like. (And obviously it didn't work long-term, since I'm still having b/p issues...)

Since then I went through an eating disorders center in Los Angeles and was recommended to a fantastic therapist. She was great overall; my only complaint was that she was a real pusher of OA meetings. I went to meetings for a few months - I even got a sponsor - but never felt myself take to it. (I need to really connect with something to devote the time to it, and the "Anonymous" program isn't for me personally.) But since I stopped going to therapy in 2006, my b/p has decreased from every day to a couple of times a month. So even though I haven't "beat it" completely, that's progress. (And honestly, this website and our group here in particular are helping me tremendously).

So there's a couple of suggestions...I wish I could be of more help to you.

One other thing I'd like to share with you is that every time I'm about to visit my parents, I start having more frequent episodes. (I live 3,000 miles away from them, but I still see them once or twice a year). I have never been able to fully explain why that happens. Emotionally it's the "stress of not being good enough", but rationally speaking, I've come to terms with the source of my eating disorder...so why does the "imminent threat" of seeing my family conjure up the urge to purge? (RE: "imminent threat" - j/k - I love and adore my family, but it is stressful to be around them - I've lived far away from them for 15 years). I've come to the conclusion that it's being in an environment where I am a) out of my routine, and b) feeling as though I'm seven years old again, and therefore constantly being judged.

So you are not alone...and please email me if you just want to vent...

You are all so awesome - thanks for the support and great words of wisdom. sharonclaire, you're an inspiration! I look forward to the day when I can spend the whole day at home alone and not be tempted to binge...congrats! 

Thank you, liora513 and sharonclaire!

You can get your life back, kae1106. We're all here to cheer you on...and kudos for telling your best friend - that was so courageous of you.

yyonah - day 79, WOW!

sharonclaire, alexwilliams, jolie_fille - you're all doing so great - congratulations!

I hope everyone who is following but not posting is doing well. For all those who are posting, thanks to all of you for sharing your successes and experiences. I find you all so inspirational - it helps me a lot to know that I'm not alone in the temptation to binge.

I stood in front of one of my binge foods yesterday at the store - and I didn't buy it. That is SO huge for me...granted, I stood there for at least five minutes, but I resisted. Yay!  

Days without bingeing (including today): 8

I sympathize with the weekend struggles, everyone...that's usually me, too. But this weekend was different. I actually STOPPED a binge Friday after work before it became totally out of control! 

But wait - there's more! I even kept my calories in line all weekend. And I had been doing 90+ minute hard core workouts all week, so I took a break and just took a few walks with my husband instead.

I don't mean to gloat, but this is a huge accomplishment for me...and honestly, I have you all to thank. SO THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for your support!!

Days without bingeing (including today) = 6

Tracy, so glad to hear that you've lost 2 more pounds!! 16 pounds - you're doing so GREAT!! Whoo-hoo!!

Just to share, I had a four day weekend in Vegas with my family last weekend - had a TOTAL BLAST - I did okay food-wise but MAN! Margaritas galore, including a few calorie-packed frozen ones! Anyway, I came home to a shocking four pound weight loss. Sometimes your body needs the break, I think.

Keep up the good work!!

Nice - another doctor with a God complex. Just goes to show that 8 extra years of schooling does not a genius create.

Just wanted to chime in with my opinion on vegetarianism...I think it can be an amazing thing for your overall health and wellness, but it depends on the individual. Some people need animal protein, some don't. I've tried it but chicken kept calling my name...

I agree with fluffydarryl 100% - staying active is so important for your overall health (and, if you're anything like me, your MOOD!) 

Believe me, you're not alone in your frustration! Weight battles have haunted so many of us our entire lives...I'm recovering from bulimia myself, so I know how it feels to spend my day crying and hating myself.

Can I recommend some reading? Bob Greene's "The Best Life Diet" explains a lot about weight gain when you change your eating habits...you may not be into following his plan, but it has a lot of terrific info.

Best of luck to you - hope we don't lose you from this great community...

I agree!

I also find that checking in on this site helps me SO much to get back on track after I "fall off the wagon".  We all have overdoing it days, and it helps to know that you're not alone!

I have a desk job, too, but I do a lot of intermittent walking (just to stay active), like parking my car really far away from places. I fidget a lot, and since I drink tons of water I run to the restroom pretty often. Also, when I get home I make dinner, do dishes, etc...so I think all of that counts as "Light Activity".

In my opinion chasing puppies would count for quite a bit of activity. As long as your not sitting all day and all night through, I think you'd qualify.