Posts by cianderson08

it is low in cals, but as from experience - I got my 'cals' from drink, for over a year and a half. I would literally go days on end without eating, then drink. If I knew I was having something that night, I'd not eat for days. Firstly, I was scared of the cals and secondly, if I didn't eat, then I'd feel the effects more. Even my doctor was shocked that I'd managed to stay alive at my weight for so long, I got told that I'd have about a few months then that was it. So - TGI Fridays it was that night.

I'm still trying to stop drinking (I shall make a topic in a sec as I really need advice.. again...) But I have now 'recovered' health wise from anorexia, but I binge on the oddest things whilst drinking. Eg - Today I have had  9 slices of cheese (fake crap you get on burgers that I hate) MEAT! I'M A FRIGGIN VEGETARIAN! Chocolate (also hate) and bread (allergic) I'm kicking on 3k+cals at the moment, which is fine, as in a few days, water weight will go down etc etc but it is hard for someone to stop a habbit. Very hard. Especially something like booze.

My mother is an alcoholic, and she has tried her hardest lately to cut down to one bottle wine a night, but she's shoving on the weight just 'for something to do'. God help her if she stops smoking too!

Anyhoo, Yes, it will help your weight loss - Just keep busy! Really, I've just whacked on 6lbs in a week because I never drank. My scale is now the devil.

Don't focus on losing the lbs, focus on your liver. Drink lots of tea instead. (I've taken to orange juice) At the moment, as I am having a rough time I've taken to 'Lambrini' - 7.5% and I've found that I'm actually ok going a few days without drinking now.. tho' my arms have grown.. sigh.

It's fantastic you are able to open up about it, I know it's hard.

My doctor gave me great advice.. A) Get a dog. which I did, and my parents stole her when I took her to visit! So I got 2 cats instead! B) whenever you go to the shops, instead of spending the money on drink, buy something you'd not normally go for (again, I bought a brand spanking new fondue set and C) Think of the money you'd spend, put it in a box that you HAVE to smash to get out, and use that cash on something fantastic. Designer bag eg. You'd never want to ruin it!

Oh, a bike is also great by the way, you're always too tired at the end to even think about being seen in a shop :)

I had the same, it took me 2 months to even budge on the scale!

though I was quite a bit lower than you are now, just under 5st (in lbs - unsure!) I got given the choice of moving back with my parents, or going into hospital.

My mother would wake me up at stupid am with a few bits of toast then feed me 'bits' throughout the day. Highly horrid, as I'm 21 and not lived with them since I was 15, but alas.

What I'm saying is, eat LITTLE and often, you won't feel so bad, but make sure you do.

You need to get there hun, I know it's hard. I'm still at the 'im fat etc' stage. But it's not you thinking that. It's the bloody ed.

I got some good advice from my sister "Were you happier when before this? Think back to then, and then just think, you can start doing all that again. If you visually remember all the nice things you did before (eg, I went traveling around china/aussie for 4 months) You'll want to get there tobe able to do it again"

She was right! I'm saving for 6 month trip back to aus!

What foods do you like? Eat those, then gradually bring in other foods. Drink normal milk, not low fat etc. Eat cheese. If pizza happens to be an unsafe food, scrape all the ingredients off it, leave the base and eat the rest (did that a lot)

this may be bad advice, but - take a BIG step, just once. Order a chinese with friends/family. . don't focus on the food, watch them eat, enjoy the chatter, and you might find you 'mimic' their behaviour..

agree on the different room thing, I'm not for 'don't buy it in' because it's not worth it, and if someone craved it that much, they go buy it anyway.

I stay in a studio flat, so apart from my cheerios (they go NOWEHERE without me) I have taken everything out of here, bar milk, coffee etc because in order to go get it, I'd have to walk out in the cold, unlock another door, go through another door, into a kitchen to be attacked by the dog. It works.

Either that or I leave it on my bf's desk so he munches it for me, whilst I glare at him from the other side of the place :)

I'd class myself as curvy, but I'm tiny, too.

Ach, who cares? be youself, get the weight YOU want, and anyway the whole 'guys like curves' is sexist towards those inclined to the same sex :D

(I'm not one of them, btw)

Ok. I was anorexic.. and I would literally eat NOTHING solid for days on end, til' I was so shaky I couldn't even eat ice cream (i only ate it for sugar levels) - bad, bad idea - noone should go through that.

Before that, though - I ate around 1110 - 1200cals a day (I'm 5'2) and cut out empty cals - booze etc, junk food, processed things.. and found that was most effective.

Yes, you can lose by eating under, but you also suffer. Headaches, get colds easily, etc etc.

Now i'm recovered, and as i was in starvation, I've gained more than I like, and drank too much over the past few years - ergo, no booze anymore and back to 1200 cals and excersize.

Easy does it for the best results.

I have the same problem.. I can barely get 800cals a day! So I now try wake up at about 5am and have a bowl of cheerios to knock it slightly up! Although now I've given up Alcohol.. which til' Monday was a BIG part of my calorie intake.. tis going to be tough.

Although if you like Ice cream, smash a cookie up in it too. or instead of just a green salad, have some lean meats/tofu etc in it too.

I've not had mine since Feb2007! I'm now above what I'd like to be, and it's not here... I miss the cramps!

I can say I feel the same, but unfortunately, I can't offer advice, as I know within myself that 'looking better' is not as important as 'being happy and helathy'.

I have a daily struggle with myself, I can't shower without having the mirror covered up, and I avoid ANY tight clothes as long as I can.

BUT -some days, I wake up, think of my sister, who I think is gorgeous - long, thick dark red hair, eyes to die for and curves any girl would want, and I wonder, why am I striving to ignore to become that? Why would I want to look like anything else? She's gorgeous, inside and out. She has THE most amazing boobs, and a waist that even a skinny girl would want, she's happy, makes her own clothes, and doesn't care if she jumps a size from one to the next shop.

You might have 'lumps and bumps' - but in the long run, those are better for having children, gives your partner MORE to touch and you can wear amazing corsets.

I now have days on end where I wear nothing but baggy clothes, sleep in clothes nect to my partner of 2 1/2 years, and then wake up and it's a whole new me - I go out, buy something (2 days ago it was hair dye) and change something about myself. I even braved the shower earlier - without the towel, was feeling great til' something happened tonight, and now I feel thought I've jumped 1 step forwards and 2 back. :(

But you need to accept that your body will want to stay a weight, unless you abuse it. Use your assets. Big bum? Tight jeans! Big bust? Corset! Small waist? Belt!

Only YOU need to know what is under clothes. By all means, work out, but don't forget that in the future, you might want to be a bit curvy, as all girls know - big hips - good babies! (yes, I may be sure thats not true.. but as the saying goes...)

Edit - I'm saying this as a 'recovered (so to speak - not recovered mentally, and suffered from the ED for nearly 2 yrs) anorexic. Honestly, just accept the 'bits' you are unsure of, make the most of them and flaunt it hon! I hate my arms and belly just now, so i'm trying to wear as many short sleaved tops as I can to get used to them, I even let my photographer boyfriend take pics - without make-up today!

It takes time, and a lot of effort, but just try to see that in the mirror, you see a different person than others do. 103lbs is nothing, even if someone were 4.11ft!

haha, in my half-awake state I actually managed to spell 'juice' wrong =/

I did however, just make a 'french bread' for my partners girl.

Bread, Egg whites, pepper, semi-skimmed milk, basil. - whisked up in a bowl then browned in a hot pan.

I then put sliced chicken and some tomato on top, under the grill for 4 mins. She liked her brekkie!

Bumping this topic - I'm officially out of size 0 clothes! Funny, considering 2 years ago I was dying to get into them, now I can buy underwear! poochy belly needs to go, but yay! No more kids section!

Now to bring on the topic of kids to my partner... haha.

Guys. keep it up, you're all here for a reason, and are doing fantastic. :)

Chicken Pasta. .  Whole grain pasta, cubed chicken, chopped veggies. For the sauce - Olive oil, lemon jiunce, herbs, chillie flakes.

Chicken wraps/pittas - Sliced chiken, lettuce, diced cucumber, pesto.

Layrered chicken - Chicken covered with pesto, dipped in low-cal breadcrumbs, served with brown rice.

Chicken dippers - bite sized pieces, little bit of yolk, low-cal crumbs, great cold too (apparently - i make these for my partners girl sometimes and she loves them)

Home made pizza - Pitta/Toast/Wrap, layer of puree, garlic, pepper, low-cal cheese, some chicken.

This might sound odd, but my brother loved it when I cooked and made 'inventions' as we were running out of food, I made him chicken stuffed with rice and herbs, and I had vine leaves stuffed with rice.

Funny, I'm veggie yet spend my time cooking meat! =/

First name: Claire

Country: Scotland

 Favorite food: Artichoke, Vegan Sushi

 Favorite actress/actor: Alan Rikman

 Favorite movie: Labyrinth

Siblings? If so, how many? 2, older bro, older sis

How many parents live at home? As far as I'm aware, 2.

Favorite class at school? Art

Pet peeve[s]? Bad grammar, having the cold..

[I added this one on] Why are you on CC? Recovering from an ED..

 Favorite book? Mists of Avalon, anything by Bernard Cornwell..

Do you have any allergies? IBS :(

 If you could eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? Cheerios!

 Do you have a BF/GF? Yes, I live with him.

Do you play an instrument? Piano/Clarinet/Ocarina/Xzylophone

Vegetarian, vegan, kosher, ect...? Vegetarian, only have milk in coffee.

Favorite place to shop [clothes] H&M, CULT.

Original Post by hummus86:

So I'm on the road to recovery from binge eating disorder and depression..but I have these days when I feel so unloved, so unattractive, so unmotivated to continue on.

It's only 8:51 am, and I have already eaten a whole row of chips ahoy cookies and half a bag of twizzlers (on top of my breakfast).

I looked in the mirror today, and I can see how unattractive i've become. I've gained about 15 lbs during my recovery (now 128 lbs at 5'4"... but very very small-boned so most of the weight went on my waist and face), and I've cut my hair real short (used to be very long, but the style now is like katie holmes... bob with swept bangs). I cut my hair after I was dumped by my boyfriend and wanted a fresh start. But everywhere I go, people always ask why I cut my hair, and they no longer compliment me. No guy looks at me anymore. And being the stupid person I am, I posted a picture of myself on yahoo answers and asked what guys would rate me, and they all said that I need to lose weight and grow my hair out.

I don't know.. I'm just feeling so depressed lately. I feel that no one wants me. =(

 I know exactly how you feel sweetie. I hate everything about myself at the moment after gaining weight again. I'm 5'2 and 103lbs at the moment, it jumps daily, so I'm guessing this would be my 'ideal' weight.

I also cut my hair short! I did it because my 'new start' was to get over my anorexia, though. . I forced my partner to cut it, then we bleached it white. I hate the length, and also think my face looks massive. But, there are easy ways to fix these problems.

1) Do not look in the mirror undressed until' you are having a fantastic day, then look, then the next day, ask yourself, what changed that made you accept and like yourself - keep thinking about that!

2) Hair extentions, baby! (I'm buying mine soon - I miss long hair, there's limited amounts as to what you can do when it's short!)

Also, ignore those idiots on yahoo, be yourself, have confidence, wow some guy off his feet and enjoy life.

by the way, I also had cookies for breakfast, followed by a rather large amount of pasta, reeces buttercups (im in scotland, so when I find those, they are a mega treat) and about to hit my second bottle of wine!

Enjoy life honey! Also, they may have been nasty on yahoo, but I can almost guarentee you have more inner strength than they do, and that if they were to see what you have now to flaunt, they would never grudge you again!

It really depends on what your body can take.

I have IBS but can take whole wheat bread occasionally, not apples, nor pumpkin of all things! I'm unsure abaout eggs, as I only ever eat them 'just done' with soldiers :)

but if you are including that list into your daily diet, it will cause some upset as carbs/sugar/wheat/protein are all mixed.

Dairy is also sometimes a no-go. Red meat, fruit sugar, refined sugar. Most everything can cause it, it again, depends on what you can take.

I have the same problem, too (only the last few months, and I'm craving things no-one in their right minds would eat)

I literally just ate 'boxed macaroni' - which i hate, and I had it with salt AND brown sauce, also, detest it.

I never used to do it when I had something substantial around the afternoon. I never ate bread, but had a home-made soup and some cracker rice cakes or veggie sushi. My mother used to make the most amazing scottish scones (I miss living there, purely for that reason)

Now though, I'm eating things my body doesn't take to, not only do I eat and eat, have the guilt, but I suffer the next day!

Have something that combines everything if you can (I know, it's a taboo thing to do) in the afternoon. Protien, starch, veg, dairy(or soya), fibre, carbs etc. It's easy to do, and you can make some delicious, light yet filling meals!

eg - (I'm a vegetarian but I cook meat) Chicken/turkey/fish with whole wheat noodles, sauteed mixed veg, garlic, bit of lemon juice with a sauce made from soya milk/milk, coconut milk, herbs, spices, cinnamon stick, cumin and a crisp salad.

Honestly, have a larger meal through the day, keep brekkie and dinner lighter.

If you are hungry before bed, nothing beats a lovely frozen yoghurt or toast and a cup of tea :)