Posts by malaika99

My sister was a tank as a baby. She ate as much as you gave her, and apparently my aunt and grandmother once had a contest to see how much they could get her to eat. Strangers would stop in the supermarket and compliment my mom's "little pumpkin. At 27, she weighs around 50kg and has never dieted. My brother was a tiny baby who would get distracted after eating 3 cornflakes. At 19, he's close on 6 feet tall. Still skinny, but starting to fill out now. Babies are weird, but they seem to balance out on their own.

It sounds like you're sick of being told by other people how your body should look. Those kids who made nasty comments about you left deep hurts and the scars are still there. Honestly, even your 'chubby' photo looks like it's just a bit of puppy-fat. Kids are mean, and they look for all sorts of reasons to make fun of each other - even when those reasons are not really true. I saw it in a school-friend whose grandparents owned a chinese restaurant. She was a little chubbier than the rest of us but nothing unhealthy, and the other girls made her feel so fat that she ate nothing but apples for weeks. Now in her 20s, she's at a healthy weight and doesn't worry about it any more. I think it helped to discover that her boyfriends really didn't care how much she weighed. Also, she started focusing on things other than the way she looked to be proud of: she headed the chinese students association at university and switched to a degree that she was good at and made her happy.

To answer your question about the belly-fat, I've noticed in myself that I get a belly when I'm stressed, regardless of how much I weigh. And restricting your diet to an unhealthy extent can be part of that stress. If you're worried that you're underweight, see a doctor to find out if you really are. Put on more muscle if you want to (and that will mean eating more, specially protein) - but rather than focusing on the changes in how you look, try focusing on other things: your increase in strength, the good mood that exercise can cause, that kind of thing. Try getting good at other things that have more to do with your mind than your body, and watch how it helps your self-esteem and body image improve. So much of these issues are in our heads. I've had 'fat days' where just as I'm feeling like a total slug my husband will walk past and call me a goddess. Ok, so that part's probably in his head, but it does help to put things in perspective.

Calcium inhibits magnesium? But my supplement puts the two together to help absorption. Hmm.

I know I'm short because whenever I log my food for the day, the analysis says around 40% RDA for iron and 60% for calcium.

I slept til 12 today, so everything's a little out.

Breakfast: toast, cottage cheese, giant peri peri peanuts

Lunch: leftover baked gemsquash-sweetcorn-cheese things, rooibos tea, salted liquorice

Snack: spoon of peanut butter, coffee

Projected supper: mielie pap, boerewors/soy sausage, tomato gravy and some kind of side vegetable. Maybe some ice cream or decaf.

Has he tried all the conventional things for insomnia? I'd say the quickest fixes would be cutting out caffeine after late-afternoon, having a set time to go to bed, and not doing things that are too mentally stimulating just before then (internet, scary movies/books). Exercise just before supper can help. It can help to write down everything you're thinking of so it's off your mind, but earlier in the evening so you don't end up worrying about it in bed. A going-to-bed routine can help: at a certain time, start calming down, maybe have a bath or drink some chamomile tea, and then go to bed once your mind is clearer.

Sometimes being a teenager is just a bit angsty. My sister suffered from teenage insomnia for about two years, but hasn't had any problem sleeping as an adult. So if all else fails, at least it doesn't last forever.

Hee, I just caught your screen name. Are you Dutch?

Environmental factors:

As a high-schooler, moving to a house too far away to walk to school and cross-country training. And not changing my eating patterns.

As a just-finished schooler, three months living overseas with a large and aggressive aunt who believes in No Leftovers.

As a postgrad, moving to a wine-farming town. Wine makes me relax a little toooo much.

As a stoopid, a long-distance relationship accompanied by a week of bliss (and eating) together, followed by a week of depression (and eating) apart, once a month.

As a not-so-stoopid (newly married), lack of desire or time to go to gym, plus husband's delicious and not-too-healthy cooking.

Funnily enough, the effect of these factors has decreased with time. I chalk it down to either increased self-awareness, this site, or inability of my stomach to stretch like it used to.

My hardest class (moot) is still in progress: I'm getting married, we got given a research topic a week before the wedding, and the heads of argument are due the day after I get back from the honeymoon. Mind you, that's more my own fault. Weirdly, I tend to do best in the hard courses. I nearly killed myself in high school maths and physics, and again in philosophy of language, and ended up top of the class. I love the so-called difficult subjects of criminal and contract law. Easy-but-boring things are the problem. I nearly failed the first semester of roman law (which was straight off-by-heart learning) because I couldn't make myself go to class. And I failed insolvency law because it was so darn depressing.

I guess I'm only interested in the challenge.

Yeah, even when I put ON weight it was still a thumbs-up. That was pretty funny. I've found it to be pretty inaccurate about when I'll reach goal, but that's partly because I'll diet and not lose anything for a month, and then suddenly it all drops off overnight.

YUM! I say, make 'em.

I'd replace the sweetener with 2 teaspoons of proper sugar, because it's such a small amount it won't make much calorie difference, and I find that sweetener actually makes me hungrier and I eat more overall.

When I first stopped counting, I went a bit crazy and ate a lot all the time. Then I calmed down and maintained, about a kilo above my goal weight. I find it fluctuates by about 2kg over the year: I get heavier in winter and at times of stresss, and then lighter in summer and holidays without having to think about it. At the moment, I've been eating way over maintenance (by my estimates), less active than usual, and losing weight anyway because of wedding stress. So it can help to realise that the burn meter is not always accurate, anyway.

A: With little knives and forks.

Q: How do you make pancakes?

Yes! I have 5 weeks to go, and I don't really want to get lighter, just thinner. If that makes any sense. Toning, I guess. Brides are supposed to get skinnier as the day approaches, just from the stress. Sadly, my stress has left me with no time for gym and reversing all my hard work. Still, I doubt anyone but me will notice my toning level on the day - they'll be too busy partying and being happy with us:)

I buy it from an Asian market, too! It's fresher and way cheaper ($.15 versus $2.50). You can either freeze it or store it under water like they (hopefully) do at the market. It keeps for 3 days in the fridge, a bit like meat.

2 very easy recipes:

Steamed tofu: put about 200g of tofu in a microwaveable dish with lid, cover with chopped spring onions and microwave on high for a minute. Eat it drizzled with soy sauce.

Miso soup: Boil enough water for a serving or two of soup (1-3 cups) and pour into a pot. Stir in enough miso (healthy japanese soup stock: also available in an asian market) so that it tastes similar to chicken soup (start with a tablespoon and keep tasting). Bring back to the boil and add thin slices of carrot and spring onion. Drop in 1cm cubes of tofu, turn off heat and eat as soon as the tofu is heated through. You can also add a bit of sliced dried seaweed if you're hardcore (I prefer it without).

Original Post by merylwhite1:

In a country like this it's expected that you should hire a cleaner as soon as you are able to, as you are providing a job for somebody that needs it.

In my country, too. EVERYONE who is middle class (even low-wage middle class like nurses and teachers) seems to have at least a 2-day-a-week maid, if not a full-time one. It used to be that everyone had a live-in maid and gardener who they paid sub-minimum wages to, but thankfully that's changing.

I know I would be providing someone with a job, but I just can't stand the idea of someone cleaning up after me like I'm helpless. There's got to be some other way to create jobs. And given my country's history, it plays to the stereotypes of the rich white madam. So my fiance and I found a place small enough that we can keep it clean ourselves, and we share the chores. We're thinking of sending our ironing to the laundry, though - for some reason it gets me in the foulest mood imaginable, and it's just not worth it:p