Posts by readermoth

peanut butter and hmm let's see...peanut butter!

this week: 195

last week: 195

loss/gain: nothing

You know, I'm getting used to this. I guess I really never see big losses, but slow and steady is better than that crazy 8 week plateau I had to live through! Anyway, I'm hopeful for next week.

Back to an old topic - sabotage - my husband bought a bread machine! Are you kidding me! I found the lowest calorie, highest fiber bread recipes I could find and it isn't too bad. The hardest thing is to stop at one piece. You know, one piece of anything was never my problem. It's the stopping at one piece. I find I am gaining control of impulsive eating. . . for now anyway.

***mini challenge***

Well I have to agree with so many of you that mention husbands and boyfriends. I use to feel a little guilty not joining in with my former binge buddy. It feels like I've kind of deserted him. It's not like he couldn't stand to lose a few pounds himself, but everyone has to come to weight loss in their own time - if ever. Anyway, in the beginning I would give in and we would stop for an ice cream cone, or pick up a pizza on the way home in the evening. As I started to see some hard earned weight loss, I didn't want to ruin my hard work and I started to make excuses for not ordering anything but a diet drink, but that takes more willpower than I possess. So I have finally just started saying that I didn't want to stop. I feel like I am stealing his fun, but I have to take care of myself. It won't kill him to skip an banana split once in a while. When we do special things, he can enjoy himself. It just won't be twice a week anymore.

Either that, or he will find another binge buddy! I guess we'll see what our marriage is made of!!

Another theme that I can relate to is the Mom thing. She 5 feet tall and 95 pounds. She gave birth to 6 children and her highest weight ever was 130 pounds. So, needless to say, she doesn't understand obsessive eating or obesity at all. My mom is a typical Italian mom in that she cooks all the time and feeds everyone else. All 6 of her children are overweight or obese. My youngest brother tops 360 pounds. I have to say, she means well. But any visit involves endless amounts of foods ranging from cookies to candy to sandwiches to chips to a homemade meal if you asked her for it! When we were kids we were not well off and food was limited so maybe she is making up for that or something. I don't know, but I actually stand in the corner of her kitchen when we visit so I am not sitting at the table with the bowls of goodies. My parents are elderly and need some help so I check on them three times each week after dinner and they both insist I eat. I have to be downright rude after 50 polite "no thank-yous" and then they sulk. It took me a long time to be able to go there and leave without eating anything, but my siblings still sit and nibble for hours. Imagine the damage that can be done with a junk food smörgåsbord in front of you. Yikes!

Wow, this challenge is an eye-opener for me. I always felt like a failure because I was fat, but it's very hard to disappoint your parents. I wonder how many calories I ate to make them happy. Good thing I finally found the stamina to stand up to them.

this week: 197

last week: 197

loss/gain: 0 (again)

I am the queen of the plateau!! Hopefully when work starts this week it will change my routine enough to give me a little jump start. I have to work hard to keep exercising and eating healthy though. Usually the stress of September leads to a less than healthy lifestyle, and regular exercise is the first casualty!

Why I want to end this crazy cycle of yo-yoing:

1. I am sick of shopping in the fat lady shops (although they are a lot better than they used to be).

2. I am tired of hiding in the back of pictures.

3. I am sick and tired of thinking about it ALL THE TIME. I want to learn to live a healthy lifestyle and then get on with it.

4. I want to be a good role model for my daughter (who is starting to follow in my footsteps).

5. I don't want to be considered obese by the medical world any more.

6. I want to feel like a success and not a failure.

7. I want to live a full and happy life.

8.  I want to fit comfortably in airplane, movie, concert, and any other seat.

I know most of these are shallow, but they're real.

magaroonie - sadly no, the fair had its way with me,  my resolve lasted until my second beer and then it was grease and sugar from there.  I had a blast and when I figured out the damage it was 3,200 calories - ouch.  However, when I entered the 7 hours of slow speed walking CC said I burned about 1,300 calories so the day was wash, call it even.  Or so I thought, it seems the sodium and sugar are having a bit of a lasting effect so its a bit more exercise and lots of water for me this week .

this week - 197

last week - 197

loss/gain - zero, zip, nadda

My one and only excuse is: because I deserve it

I can make that fit any situation whether it be happy or sad. I give myself permission to blow it on vacation, for holidays, when I'm stressed, when I'm angry, when I'm tired, when I've lost weight (yea figure that one out?), when company visits, when I'm lonely . . . and the list goes on and on.

My solution is to get honest and set my priority straight. What I really deserve is a fit and healthy body and mind, not cookies and chips. I think I finally have it under control, keep your fingers crossed.

This week:  197 lbs.

Last week:  199 lbs.

Loss:  2 lbs.

Phew!  Monday weigh-ins are scary!  I guess alexanderrob was right about Monday's keeping us honest over the weekend. 

lisalac - that's hilarious, thanks for the laugh. I alway knew that extra long shower was causing problems!!

Great week so far. I'm proud of the fact that it was my birthday and I was able to celebrate without going over my daily calories and without missing out. I preplanned and adjusted accordingly the day before and the day after and was able to go to the Cheesecake Factory and have dinner and dessert with my family. I don't know about you guys, but one of the biggest problems I have had over the years is finding balance. I was an all or nothing kind of girl. So a trip to the Cheesecake Factory in the past went one of two ways: #1 go, eat poorly, feel bad and binge for three days because I felt like a failure... or #2 go, don't order anything but a plain salad and make my family nervous because I wasn't eating or having dessert. #2 always caused stress, so believe it or not #1 was easier.

I am so proud that I could be normal like everyone else and just go, have fun, and move on with my life. I know this may seem weird to some, but for me food has always controlled me, now I am controlling it!  Yeah me!!

Today's weight: 199

My plan for the next week is to seriously, no I mean very seriously:

1. reduce the sodium to release some of the water I am holding on to

2. dust off the "Bow Flex Knock-off" my husband bought last year and create a 30 minute routine

3. eat no more or less than 1600 calories each day to create about a 600 calorie deficit

Good luck to you all with your goals. I am so inspired by all of you. Won't it be great when Halloween gets here and we're all so much healthier. Then the trick will be to stay away from the candy!

I'm a New Yorker and I'm looking out my kitchen window at some sleeping cows right now! I think the vast majority of New Yorkers that live anywhere but the city of New York have seen plenty of farm critters. Many people equate the city with the whole state. Most of the state of New York is very tame and filled with dairy farms.

As for common things I have never done - hmm - manicure, pedicure, massage I guess I don't like being touched! I wouldn't consider a bikini wax - at 200 pounds not much chance of wearing a bikini! I've never gone paint balling either.