Posts by deadwing

So far so good, so far so good. :D

Gonna be at home all day today, so let's hope I don't get too bored and start hopping over to the fridge every 5 mins. :D

Thanks for the support guys, I'll definately keep your advice in mind!

Today went fine, maybe cus I was real caught up with work. I guess I will try and bury myself in activities all day so that there will be no time for me to really sit down and get bored, which will trigger cravings for me as well.

I'm currently 180cm and 82kg. I'm excercising daily now with rugby season coming up, so I'm burning lots of calories. The thing is, binging is REALLY slowing me down. It makes me feel sluggish and lazy, and I really can't afford it now. My performance has dropped, as I have mentioned earlier, and I'm really looking to fix that. It's just so damned hard for me. I don't think it's my physical need for food anymore, since I've gained tons of weight. I think it's now more likely a mental disorder. I've been reading up on ED's, and I think what I'm doing is trying to regain control over my body/life in a very very very disordered way - through binging. I've got to find another way to regain control over my life and body. Anyone here with any clue as to what I can do?

Before my ED (post-weight loss) my caloric intake was around 3000kcal typically, and I was maintaining my weight on that. It was plentiful, but I still felt starved. So I kinda snapped :(

God I just binged like a madman today. I don't know WHY I did it. God. I feel awful. Like. Pure ****. I'm really depressed right now. I STILL have'nt stopped binging for more than 3 days. God, this is getting out of hand.

Thanks alot for the responses!

I've thought through all the posts, and I've reached the conclusion that for now, I'll just focus on getting rid of my unhealthy relationship with food and forget about losing weight for a while, at least until I'm healthier mentally. After that, I'll focus on losing weight slowly till I'm comfortable with it, should be around 75kg this time, as I believe I put on quite a bit of muscle mass due to my training through the binging episode(s).

1 day without binging, no cravings so far! :D

I'm 1.8m. I know Im not exactly FAT fat, but understand that this is coming from an previously 70kg guy, and 82kg now for me is a HUGE increase in weight. I'm not looking to lose it all, cus I have weight-lifted throughout my binges, and I can see that I had gained quite abit of muscle, with loads of fat as well. I'm just trying to break this binging disorder, and redeem my life back. After I regain control of my life, will I start to re-evalutate my aims, which will most likely be to lose weight, till I hit 73kgish.

But my main goal now is to kick this destructive habit.

And aoifek, thanks a million for your reassuring words, I really apprecite it. I just hope it would'nt amount to nothing. I'l try!