Posts by huntermom2727

i honestly don't register colour or gender, i just register obnoxious and--sorry, but--american.

Is this statement not basically equating obnoxious with American? 

Just before that, she wrote:

...me, i'm a white canadian woman.  i add "canadian" because when i see obnoxious people portrayed in the media, i cringe and change the channel, and because it's almost always american media. 

Why else would she feel the need to specify that she's "canadian"?  Because she wouldn't want to be mistaken for *gasp* an American woman?

Respectfully -- maybe I read it wrong, but I don't think so.

Original Post by pgeorgian:

...me, i'm a white canadian woman.  i add "canadian" because when i see obnoxious people portrayed in the media, i cringe and change the channel, and because it's almost always american media.  i can't cope with yelling, people talking over each other, etc.  i honestly don't register colour or gender, i just register obnoxious and--sorry, but--american.

Not the most open-minded statement.  All Americans are not obnoxious.  That's just the same as saying all black women are "sassy" and "loud".  Don't judge an entire country by our media outlets...they have long since lost touch with the reality and sentiments of us everyday Americans.  Why do Canadians have such a distaste for Americans anyway?  I hear that alot.

There are stereotypes all over the place and I try not to pay attention to any of them...but it is hard sometimes.  I think the stereotypes here in the deep South are especially prevalent.  I don't know if that's because integration took longer down here, tougher economics, thus lower income families (of all races), less tolerance or what.  But it's true.  It definitely seems different the further north and west you go. -- Around here, there are a LOT of racist comments uttered (by whites, blacks and hispanics) and most of the time, those same people will turn right around and claim NOT to be racist.  My husband is like that and it drives me crazy...but he has black friends that call the house and I will hear them joking around calling each other the *n* word and "honkey" and "white trash" etc.  And they're friends.  You can tell they each harbor some of the feelings that those words carry, but they each understand it and even make fun of it.  They're open and honest though -- that's for sure.

Hell, I get stereotyped all the time.  I'm a a white, blonde-haired girl from Alabama.  When I've traveled up north, it seems like people automatically deduct 200 IQ points when they find out I'm from AL and another 100 for being a blonde.  They act like they assume I grew up barefooted in a trailer park drinking RC Colas and eatin' Moon-Pies.  I tell 'em, "Yeah, my brother got mad when I called the wedding off, my dog died, the trailer burned down, my pickup truck is in the shop, but at least I still have my Willie Nelson CD's and a few teeth left."  And I say it in the thickest red-neck southern drawl you could imagine.

I was in the copy room talking with some of my friends from work (three black folks and a white guy) and a lady had been making trouble for them.  I called her a BEE-OTCH and my black girlfriend nearly busted a gut laughing at me for saying it that way...like she was amazed I even knew how to pronounce it "black".

Dalma - When it comes to the black women I know, I admire them for their strength and straight-forwardness.  I wish I could be more like that.  I tend to identify with them more as fellow women than black people -- although I realize there are cultural differences. -- From what you've said and what I've seen, I don't envy the stigma that seems to go along with being a black woman though.

Original Post by dove2424:

If I had the option of taking a train into work, I certainly would.  I HATE driving.  But in Florida that is just not an option.  I live out in the middle of nowhere and we are actually looking to move so that we can save on gas (and my sanity).  Some people HAVE to drive the bigger gas guzzlers.  You can't pull a trailer with a Nissan.  Also my fiance drives a truck to and for work.  He has to because spare parts and tools are in the back.  Sometimes you really have no choice in what you drive and how much.  Sometimes the job IS driving.

 

 We live in AL and we're in the same situation.  No public transportation (unless you live right in Birmingham).  I drive around 60 miles round trip every day just to get to work in B'ham.  There is nowhere closer to my home that would/could pay me the same amount as the firms in B'ham (I'm a legal assistant - believe me - I've looked).  So driving is the only option.  I drive a Kia Sorento -- small SUV.  It gets about 18 miles to the gallon and costs me over $70 to fill up.  I bought it back in '04 when the kids were small and I had to have two carseats, baby bags, etc. all the time.  Try that in a Honda.  Doable, but a pain.  No room for much else.  My hubby works for himself in the HVAC business so he HAS to drive a truck...and we have a second truck for the plant site for his one employee.  If gas went up to $8.00 a gallon, the only way I could make it would be by carpooling.  I carpool now and it costs me around $60.00 every two weeks.  Gas going up to $8 a gallon would roughly double that so I could stand $120.00 every two weeks.  When I was driving every day, it was costing me about $70-$100 a week depending on errands, ball practice, etc.  There's no way I could drive every day with gas being $8.00 a gallon.  I'd have to find a job within walking distance of home.

Hey, girl.  I live in AL -- 30 minutes north of Birmingham in Warrior, AL.  Nice to meet you!!  Welcome to CC!!  Can't say I know much at all about Demopolis though.  Hwy. 20/59 north to around Cullman would be my area of expertise. 

There is actually an Alabama Specific forum under the first topic in the Lounge: "Local and Regional CC Groups and Meetup Directory".  You can go there and click on the Alabama link. 

Original Post by floggingsully:

I don't doubt that you don't see anything wrong with it, I'm saying that when you're 25 and are looking back on it your view will most likely be very different.

 Ahhh...don't let her get you down.  I dated a guy who was 26 when I was 18.  We didn't stay together, but I ALWAYS dated older men.  Not much different than your situation.  I was always mature for my age (finished HS early, worked since I was 16, same age guys were always idiots) and my parents never had a problem with me dating older guys...because they knew me and most of the guys I went out with to some degree.  And admit it, guys mature WAY slower than girls usually.  It definitely depends entirely on the individual.  Both on the same maturity and emotional level, I say go for it.  Pervs come in all age groups.

BTW - I'm 28 now and I haven't changed my mind about it.  My hubby of 10 years ended up being 4 years older than me.  We first dated when I was 14!

I absolutely rely on Lean Cuisines for lunch at work, but I probably shouldn't.  They are loaded with sodium.  I have really low BP, so the doc actually tells me to eat extra salt.  It still bloats me up though.  Extra water seems to help.  The low calorie content and taste (a hot meal with less than 300 calories) are what keep me going back to "old reliable". 

If I didn't have to cook for DH and the kids, I'd be tempted to eat them every night.  But how are you gonna' eat a Lean Cuisine when the kids are eating "regular" food.  ?  So hard to do.  I'm not that strong. -- When I don't eat Lean Cuisines for lunch, I usually eat tuna fish with crackers or a turkey sandwich, as suggested by skdanek.  Today, I'm having 1/2 a grilled chicken pita left over from Chic Fil A last night.

Original Post by halizabeth:

Two famous battles for a woman;

Battle of the bulge

Battle of the sexes

Good luck to you in both!

 

 Here, here -- I second that.

Get Smart was actually better than I had anticipated.  Didn't hurt that The Rock was in it...that adds a star in and of itsef.  It was really funny though.  I think I actually enjoyed it more than...

Indiana Jones.  Disappointment.  His older movies were much better.  I like Shia LeBouf (however you spell it); I think he will go places as an actor.  But the movie was WAY past unbelievable...and just kind of blah.

Haven't seen Wall-E...but hear the majority say it is not anywhere near the Pixar/Disney standard set by previous movies.

I wanna' see Hancock. 

Original Post by misskady:

A friend of mine, who is getting married for the third time, said to me, "All marriages end in divorce......eventually.    Do you agree with this statement and why or why not?

It seems to me that it is a self-fulfilling prophecy. He thinks a marriage will end, so it does. It's not a very encouraging way to go into a marriage. 

No, I don't agree with that statement.  Sorry, but it takes a special kind of idiot to even make that kind of broad sweeping remark.

I think you're right -- it most likely will be a self-fulfilling prophecy for anyone going into marriage with that mindset.

Loving someone "till death do us part" is more than a feeling...it's a choice - and not always an easy one.  When you make the commitment to be together for life, you need to mean it.  There have been times when my husband and I have both been ready to call it quits, but we worked through it and were stronger (and even more in love) for it on the other side.  SO worth it.

The skin off a drunken chicken...seriously.

(Yeah, I got the chicken drunk off its a**, then took a steak knife to it.    Kidding...no, I didn't peel the skin off an intoxicated live chicken, you crazed baby eaters!)

You know -- put a whole seasoned roasting hen over a beer can, roast under some aluminum foil on the grill until done.  Then I peeled the skin off and ate every last fattening piece of it.

I was drunk at the time so I had NO self control...but it was SO good.

Congrats!! 

If you don't mind me asking - why 9 months?  And y'all have been together that whole time and had already done it once?  Wow...you're apparently a super hero and your secret weapon is willpower.

In any event -- good for you -- skinie got her groove back! 

Thanks -- I really like the "weaker sex" idea too.  Only thing -- I work in a pretty stuffy lawfirm...don't know how they'd react to something like that.  I wouldn't get it very big though - maybe the size of a quarter to half-dollar.  The other thing is my kids -- 6 and 8 -- how could I explain getting a tattoo with the word "sex" on my arm...they know about birds and bees now....but it will be a few years until they could understand the motivation behind the tattoo.  Maybe I should wait until then to get that one.  That would give me plenty of time think about it.

I want one, but y'all are right -- it has to be the right one.

Original Post by alexandrapaige:

Original Post by bigmommah:

Original Post by alexandrapaige:

In my opinion, we are here because of various issues that we are looking for help with (the majority of us) or because we have experienced personal success and want to encourage others. Those who are not here for anything positive should not be encouraged or celebrated in any way.

so, uh, who gets to decide who's really here for something positive? you?

Did you miss the part of my post that you quoted that stated "in my opinion"? Just as you have the right to find the asinine acceptable I have the right to say that it should not be accepted as the norm.

Those who are not here for anything positive should not be encouraged or celebrated in any way.

that was really the part i was talking about. i was assuming you meant the op since a bunch of people seemed to gang up on her.

but i don't really understand what you're saying. what don't you believe should be accepted as the norm? this woman's attitude towards her butt?

and on a lighter note, i find it really funny that you chose the word asinine. it's so appropriate for this thread!

 Using the word "asinine" in this thread...now that's f'in hilarious, I don't care who you are!!  Good stuff...

Wow...well...that's a tough one.  Personally, I think honesty is usually the best policy if for no other reason, it keeps your conscience clear and your heart light.  You need to weigh the value of the friendship and how strong your feelings are re: this (and your financial ability to even get out there for the wedding).  Are you close enough that you could just talk to her about how you're feeling while letting her know that you didn't want your feelings to erode your friendship?  If you remain close friends, your feelings on this will probably come out eventually anyway.  If you don't get it out in the open, go or not, will you harbor hard feelings toward your friend of 26 years?  If so, it's probably better to have an awkward conversation than a friendship completely lost.

Also, when someone's planning a wedding, their head is not all "in the game" if you know what I mean.  She's excited...and probably focused more on her future hubby than on any of the details of her wedding.  Maybe she didn't ask you because she didn't want to burden you with possible extra expensive trips out there -- to try on dresses, rehearsal, rehearsal dinners, etc.   

On the other hand, if the friendship is on a downward track anyway, you may be able to send a card and just gracefully back away...sadly, friends do come and go...especially when one moves far away.  Would you be ok with that?

Also -- just a side note - she probably won't remember half of the people who were/weren't at her wedding.  I know I didn't.

"I just think the time when women should be worried is when their men return home and then are not wanting something more hot and interesting.  That would be a warning sign to me, but that it just me. "

True, betty -- right again.  I agree 100%.