Posts by asafko

Thanks so much for the support.  The minute I start gaining I tend to pull back and my mind plays games with me.  I will keep my calories up and worry about maintenance when the time comes.... 

BTW:  Exercise is not something I enjoy, but I do just enough to make me feel like I can keep up with the kiddos.  Lala you are very right about it not being a good thing for me - I used to get obsessive about it so I have to really be careful on that front.  You are just such a wonderful support - thank you for taking time to respond.

I just thought I'd post an update as a way of holding myself accountable.

Ht:  5'4

GW:  115

LW 65

CW 105; my weight is fluctuating due to a really weird period.  I have an IUD that I'm not really liking much right now - my period started on 2/2 but is only getting heavy today.  I've had a lot of bad cramping and bloating (moreso than I used to). 

Another thing, my scale is a digital one (was pretty expensive when it was bought 9 years ago.  If I weight myself more than once I get different readings so I don't trust it (this morning...it started at 103.5, got off and on again and it jumped to 105, got off and on again and it waivered between 104.5 and 105 and stopped on 105.  Anyone have the same problem with theirs - I'm not obsessive about weighing, I just want an accurate reading so I can monitor my weight gain progress. 

Okay, so I'm not going to be measuring body fat anymore.  I actually made that decision last night because I was so mad at myself for doing it to begin with.  My stats are different than I posted though.  When I weighed myself yesterday it was after breakfast but I didn't think that would make such a difference, to be sure I weighed myself today at the time I usually do (1st thing in the morning).  So, I was 103.5.  I am active in that I have 3 small kids and work full time and do yoga and strenth training on my Wii Fit every night - not super intense, I don't like exercise but really love yoga and feeling my muscles more toned.  Am I undercutting the calories or should I see if I continue to gain (since I did gain, just not as much)?  Sorry for rambling.

Please don't worry about offending me, I am so appreciative of your willingness to provide honest feedback.  My wording was very poor and I apologize for that. 

I think what's hard is, he is 10 years older than I am (he's 48) and is afraid his weight will not allow him to live a long and happy life watching our young kids grow up so he asks for help.  I kind of want to just give him the parameters (in terms of how many calories he should be eating) and let him do the rest himself.  I feel so bad for him because he tries very hard but unlike the men in my family (I come from a family of 8 kids and we all are small framed with high metabolisms), his body has a hard time keeping the weight off. 

Again, I thank you so much for your honesty.

I know, I know - that is that nasty ED mindset sneaking in.  Sorry, was getting too focused on numbers.

I have an IUD (Mirena) that is screwing with my period (but I'm still getting it).  I look back at pre-ed, when I ate what I wanted and I maintained around 115-120 (didn't really watch it but I know it was in that range - how I long for the days where I didn't care!!!!).

I'm hypo and wondering if anyone has experienced this before - you have a hard time gaining or maintaining weight.  I have a history of an eating disorder and blamed my weight maintenance on not eating enough.  But even when I eat around 2300-2500 I don't gain.  I am older (38) so I thought that amount of calories should be enough to help me gain  (I'm 5'4 and 102 and would like to gain 13 pounds).  My dr. said my body might be reacting like its hyper even though I'm hypo.  Is this possible????  Thanks.

Thanks so much for responding.  This has been such a long road I don't like burdening any of my loved ones with this anymore.  If things were really severe, as they had been, I most certainly would need to.  My weight goals have always been on the lower end of what is healthy but I do realize I need to be closer to 115 not 110 to be safe.  That is just so scary to me, not sure why, just is.  I am aiming for 2500 now, mostly for my kids - I can not bear the idea that one of my girls would see my body and think that it is normal. 

I know I need to start varying - what I used to do was not allow the same meal 2 days in a row.  I've been having oatmeal everyday for so long I know that is something I must address (even though oatmeal is awesome and so good for me). 

As for lunch I get so stuck.  I work 2 jobs and at lunch switch from one to the other so I must eat in the car.  I can't have anything that needs to be prepared on the spot.  I've been in the rut of a yogurt, 10 pretzels and an apple.  I was also having a 1/2 sandwich before I started cutting back (usually 1 piece of whole wheat bread with 1 tbsp. soybean butter).  Any suggestions for lunch would be greatly appreciated.  Thanks again.

Thanks so much.  Now here's where my brain starts playing games....some bmi calculators say below 18.5 is underweight while others say 20.  That alters what my weight goal should be a bit - so of course I go for the one that puts me in the range at a lower weight.   

I want more than anything to not care at all about numbers and just let my body be where it wants to be but I feel as though I lost any sense of intuitive eating years ago.  I'm not convinced I can ever get that back completely.  Although I don't obsess over foods, I still feel very constrained by what my mind says is okay and not okay to eat (I think what's happened is that since it's been so many years, I just know, without obsessing, what keeps my weight in check - can anyone relate?). 

Anyhoo, I really want to proceed with recovery, I just want to make sure my goals are reasonable.  Thanks so much!

Yes, being a mom is a challenge!  I do want to set a good example and not do anything to encourage ED behavior in my kids (I have 2 girls and a boy).  I know I need to care for myself and am gonig to focus more on that, my big issue is that I must burn off a lot too (I've been stuck at this weight for a long time). 

About lunch, would you add the sandwich on top of what I'm eating?  I just don't have a good persective on what is normal anymore and can't trust my body to know.  Thanks.

I could have written this myself after the birth of each of my 3 kids.  I was breastfeeding and I couldn't keep the weight on.  I dropped to below my pre-preg. weight before leaving the hospital - I had a history of anorexia so this was really scary for me.   Here is the list a sports nutritionist and mother of twins who had the same problem of keeping weight on gave me:

 "Nursing a singleton requires around 500 additional calories a day; and if you are trying to GAIN, then I would suggest another 300-500 calories on top of that. With a base line of 2000 calories a day for basic functioning, you are looking at 2800-3000 calories a day. Thta may sound like heaven, but for anyone TRYING to gain weight, it can be harder than it sounds! Some of the best ways I've found to healthfully put on a few pounds is by making some basic substitutions and additions to your everyday eating plan. For example...

*BREAKFAST:
Choose dense cereals like Grape Nuts, granola and Cracklin' Oat Bran over lighter puffed and flake cereals. Top with chopped nuts, seeds adn dried fruits and/or raisins. Cook hot cereals in milk rather than water for extra calories. One of my favorite protein and calorie dense breakfasts is oatmeal cooked in milk with a couple spoons full of peanut butter stirred in and sliced banana on top. Mmmmmm!
*DRINKS:
Apple, cranberry, grape and most tropical fruit blend juices have more calories than orange or tomato juices. Make juice from concentrate using less water for a greater caloric boost. Dried milk, protein powders, Instant Breakfast, or even Nestle's Quik can be great additions to your milk consumption, and a re really yummy blended with juice and ice in a smoothie.
*FRUITS:
The lower the water (juice) content, the higher the calories. Look for "drier" fruits like bananas, raisins, pineapple and dried apricots rather than juicy oranges, grapefruit and peaches.
*SANDWICHES:
Look for dense "seedy" breads like sprouted wheat, sunflower or Pumpernickel. Spread each slice with a thin layer of butter or olive oil before "constructing" your sandwich. Tuna and chicken salad can be good high-calorie fillings with plenty of mayo, or the addition of nuts, raisins and/or grated cheese. Hummus is a protein and fiber packed sandwich spread that can be calorie enriched by adding some olive or sesame oil while blending. And don't forget peanut butter! I firmly believe that this is the world's most perfect food and have a PB sandwich almost every day for lunch or a post-run snack. Some of my favorite combos are...
-PB and fresh berries
-PB and banana with honey
-PB, cinnamon and sliced apple or applesauce
-PB and cucumber or dill pickle (it's actually REALLY good...trust me!)
-PB and granola with raisins
*SOUPS:
Look for heartier, bean, grain and meat based soups and/or cream based soups rather than broth based. Bulk up canned soups by making with milk or evaporated milk instead of water or adding grated cheese or olive oil.
*MEAT:
Rather than choosing traditionally high calorie meats like lamb and beef which tend to ALSO be high in saturated fats, choose leaner meats like chicken or fish and cook in olive or canola oil, and top with bread or cracker crumb toppings.
*VEGGIES:
Like fruit, the "drier" vegetables like squash, carrots, peas and corn have more calories than the watery ones like beans, broccoli and spinach. Saute your vegetables in olive or canola oil or margarine, and/or top with slivered almonds or grated cheese. Top your green salads with croutons, sunflower seeds, olives and drizzle liberally with olive oil based dressings.
*SNACKS/DESSERTS:
Choose heartier cookies like oatmeal raisin or peanut butter. Make Jell-O with juice instead of water, and make puddings using evaporated milk. Muffins, corn bread and other quick breads like carrot-raisin, zucchini or banana bread can be healthier versions of dessert. Cheese and crackers or PB are quick and easy diaper bag snacks, as are pretzels, Fig Newtons, and bagels with cream cheese. When my boys were in the NICU and I was back and forth all day I kept HUGE bags of trail mix (the kind with the M&M's ) in my bag, my car, my bedroom, wherever I happened to be! A few hands full of trail mix gave me enough protein, fat nad calories to spike my blood sugar, increase my milk production, and keep me going until the next meal."

Hope this helps you a bit, I kept it printed out and in my kitchen so I could refer to it when I couldn't figure out what to have.