Charts say obese - all friends say not

Well I looked at the charts and they say I am obese at 6 foot 2 inches and 231 pounds, age 46, male.  All my friends say I am not obese (At the border. if I loose two pounds I am just overweight), which may be an epidemic problem across america.  The doctors have cleared me for exercise though, but I need to make sure I do not hurt my joints with this weight.

So how do I handle relatives and friends saying I am not obese, or that I am looking fine; when the reality is I am overweight.   Last time I lost weight my relatives said I looked skinny when I was still ten to twenty pounds above ideal weight. 

 

Sorry for the typo

Either:

1) you are a troll,

2) you've typed your stats in incorrectly, or

3) you're not reading the charts right.

A 46 y.o. male who is 6'2" should weight between 156 and 195 pounds to be considered healthy.  Less than 156 means you are UNDERweight.  More than 195 means you are OVERweight, obese, or morbidly obese depending on how much over 195 you weigh.

Maybe he is at the eye doctor and they have changed the chart to read:

O   B  E  S  E

    

???????

 

131 pounds at 6'2" would be underweight. You do not need to lose anymore weight, and may consider gaining 12 pounds or so.

131lbs I thougt I was going mad then when I read that.  That wouldn't even be obese for me.

Assuming this was a typo... maybe 231, since you talk about being obese? BMI gives 231 and 6'2" as 29.7, so just shy of obese.

the BMI calculator is just an estimate, and cannot take into consideration your build, or the amount of muscle you have.

And to answer your real question about handling friends and family - weight lifting!  My guess is that when you lose weight, you end up somewhat "skinny fat" because you lose some muscle along with the fat, and the result is you look gaunt. Weight lifting will help prevent that, and will make your newer self look better than if you just use diet and cardio.  And because it's low impact, your weight won't be stressing your joints like running would.  Weight lifting might also help you focus more on looking good, than on the number on the scale, which doesn't always tell you the whole story about your health, you know?  Hope that helped.

Oh, and if it wasn't a typo, um... I have no suggestions.

or maybe it was metrict and the calculator thought it was in kilograms..

I'm also going to give you the benefit of the doubt and presume you meant 231 which makes you "pre-obese" (but in the "overweight category).  Many people carry their weight "well" which means that the actual number is generally a bad indicator -- you need to be looking at your measurements, your waist to hip ratio, etc.

I don't discuss my weight loss/diet with my family friends, however when somebody suggests that I am losing too much weight, that I am too skinny -- I always ask them, "How much do you think I weigh?"  When they come back a good 20 pounds under my weight, I simply explain that I carry my weight well and that my BMI -- currently the medical standard -- does not indicate that I am in any danger of being underweight.

If you exercise, you are more like to avoid the "skinny fat" problem mentioned above

You should be able to do most exercises, if you have not exercised in a long time you will want to start slowly, but a combination of cardio (to increase cardiac health and burn the calories) and strength training (to build muscle to burn the calories) would be a good idea.

If any continues to harp on you about your desire to lose weight -- simply tell them you are trying to become healthy, for yourself and for those you love.

PS -- to edit your original post and (hopefully) correct your weight -- simply click the "edit" button to the right of your picture

Honestly, how many friends and relatives are going to say, "oh yeah, you're fat, you really need to lose weight"? They're you're friends, and though it may not seem like they're helping (and honestly, if you do need to lose weight, they're not), but they're just trying to make you feel better, etc. In this day and age people are so worried about hurting someone's feelings that they'll sacrifice health to avoid it, besides, it's easier to just say "you look fine" than "you're fat, let's try to fix it"

Also, charts and BMI are by no means a be all end all. I mean, I'm 6'2" 280lbs, so I'm "servely obese", but talking to my doctor, I'm just overweight. I play football, I have a very large bone structure, and I'm quite muscular, but I do have more fat than ideal, but honestly, I couldn't imagine getting lower that 250 or 240 without losing substantial muscle mass.

Obviously, I don't know you situation, but I would suggest going by what your doctor says, they less likely to say something that you just want to hear, and they can judge your situation much better than any "chart"

Yes a typo I meant to say 231 pounds.  I corrected that in the first post.

Your height/weight stats are almost identical to my boyfriend, and judging from the way he carries weight, BMI would be a very bad predictor of his health. He carries most of his bulk in his shoulders and legs, but has nearly no belly. I would definitely go by your waist/hip measurements, and other medical tests instead (cholesterol, blood pressure, glucose tolerance, etc). Keep in mind that most charts give the ideal waist circumference of a man in reference to someone who is 5'10 or 5'11" I believe, so you may have to hunt for one that gives the circumference relative to different heights.

The one suggestion regarding exercise, other than the strength training that others have suggested, is that if you do plan on starting to jog or run, invest in a very good and very supportive pair of running shoes to avoid back and knee issues, and don't forget to stretch!

I'm 6'2" and I felt heavy at 230.  I was definitely obese at 275.  Even at 190, I think I was a bit overweight, but people around me told me I was just fine.

The thing is that the standard of "normal" in America is a lot fatter than in most countries.

 

Here in Japan, I'm not considered thin, even though I'm 6'2" and 175 now.

 

But my folks in the states think I'm skinny and need to "bulk up".  What for?  I lift weights and have never felt better.  I don't want to be musclebound (sorry, but I think it makes men look OLDER,  I'm 39 and look 29, and I like it that way!)

and I sure as hell don't want to be fat again.

You should decide for yourself what you think is a good weight for you.  We both may be the same height, but your build is surely different than mine.  If you're more muscular by nature, you might look better at 190 than at 175...

The BMI chart is much more difficult with men since muscle weighs so much more than fat-and a man's body has so much more muscle by comparison to a woman who's body is more water.  It is generally used when dealing with extremely underweight  or the morbidly obese men.

 

A BMI chart may have you as obese, but you should really consider finding out your body fat percentage. If your body fat percentage is in a normal range, that's probably why your family would think you look fine (other than just being a good supportive family, that is). And if it is in a normal range, than your fine. BMI shouldn't be the only thing you go by.

Well when you ask your friends "hey you think I'm obese" what are they supposed to say? They figure you're either fishing for compliments or insecure so of course they will say you aren't. Also, they could be heavier/just as big as you and they don't want to feel bad about themselves. Asking your friends if you look fat is a lousy idea becuase not only will it give you an unrealistic idea it is considered normal in some parts of the country to be a bit heavier. That being said, especially being a male, you may not be obese, it depends on your fat percentage. Guys who lift weights a lot obtain muscle, and I know plenty of guys who are 6'2-'6'3 and about 240-250 and it's mainly muscle and structure since they are college football players. Then again if you were you would know that and not be posting here :)

So, figure out how you look in a mirror and take steps to change that. Talk to your doctor as well.

I plugged your stats, assuming you are 231 pounds, into the CC BMI tool and got this result

Based upon your current Body Mass Index (BMI) of 29.7, you are currently classed as moderately overweight.

A healthy BMI for your gender and age is between 20 and 25 and a reasonable weight loss rate is 0.5-2 pounds a week.

Use the tools to determine your caloric and activity needs, log your food, and enjoy all the free information under the Advice tab!

Welcome and Good Luck!

OK, so my stats are nothing similar to yours, obviously I'm female and 25. I have heard many times that I don't need to lose weight from friends. I wasn't fishing for compliments, they suggested them because they noticed my healthier eating habits. This is my conclusion:

1. Im fairly tall 5'8 and I have long legs and my torso is fairly longer so my weight hides when I'm dressed.

2. Some of my friends are heavy and they are too lazy to do anything about it and they fear that by me looking better that I will look better than them. (OK so this theory may not be the same for you but could be that your friends, presumably guys, don't get the whole healthy life style and they are just telling to them you look fine. This way of thinking has likely contributed to the increased incidence of obesity in the united states.)

Just a thought! I'm sure you don't look that big though, my husband is 6'2 and weighs 235 and he looks a little over weight but not too bad. Plus you really should just not stress to them about your weight loss, tell them you are changing your lifestyle to make healthier choices because you want to decrease your risk of Heart Disease, it is maybe not exactly the truth, but its not really a lie! Good Luck.

Original Post by ktjensen:

Well I looked at the charts and they say I am obese at 6 foot 2 inches and 231 pounds, age 46, male.  All my friends say I am not obese (At the border. if I loose two pounds I am just overweight), which may be an epidemic problem across america.  The doctors have cleared me for exercise though, but I need to make sure I do not hurt my joints with this weight.

So how do I handle relatives and friends saying I am not obese, or that I am looking fine; when the reality is I am overweight.   Last time I lost weight my relatives said I looked skinny when I was still ten to twenty pounds above ideal weight. 

 

Sorry for the typo

Hey did say 231 all along

1) The common use for the word "obese" is not the same as the medical definition, the medical definition is more like at increased risk for medical conditions due to being overweight.

2) I think it is a better indicator to go by fat percentage.  I do not think I am super-muscled but I have always worked out, and for me a "healthy" BMI would put me at an unhealthy body fat percentage.  I don't know about you, but I'm not willing to lose muscle mass just to fit into the BMI scale.

Original Post by vponce:

Hey did say 231 all along 

No, he made a typo, and then edited his original post - threw everyone into some confusion, because every so often there IS a person who believes they are horridly obese at some ridiculously low weight (originally, the post read "131lb"), and the answer to his question, had he really been 131lb, would have been quite different.

I agree with tmck - body fat %, if you can find it out, is more meaningful than BMI.

1) Sorry to say, BMI is a pretty useless measure. I'm 5'10, let's say I was 210 pounds, for a BMI of 30. If with all that weight I'm sitting on the couch and I get winded walking up a flight of stairs, yeah I should probably lose weight. If on the other hand, I'm a pro football player who can bench press 300 pounds and run a marathon, I'm probably not. So consider your body fat percentage. There are affordable scales that measure body fat by passing an imperceptible current, or maybe your local gym or doctor will measure your body fat by calipers

2) Have a look at nytimes.com/2007/07/26/health/26fat.html . Maybe you need new friends, not a new diet :)