It's not about counting calories...

Don't get me wrong, I loved CC. There are really great supportive people on this site. I got a lot of information on diet and nutrition and exercise. But, losing weight is only one part of the equation. The real trick is keeping it off. 95% of dieters can't. That bothered me while I frequented this site. There is no real discussion @ how to be part of the 5%. This is understandable because so few people accomplish this. So, while here, I was reluctant to get too engrossed...I didn't want to lose it only to gain it back.

I went looking and found the psychology behind weight loss/food addictions in a book called Shrink Yourself. There may be others out there...someone has mentioned Jean Antonello. Losing the weight and keeping it off is really about changing ones orientation to food. I picked up the book a week ago. I am not thinking/worrying about food/consumption all day anymore. I am actually enjoying the food I eat now...every darn bite! I feel very relaxed because I know the weight will come off in time. I am eating sensibly. I love being able to focus on other things.

Hope someone can use this information. When you empower yourself, you can do anything! Goodbye to counting calories! Hello to eating sensibly and exercise and doing other things w/my life!  

Original Post by sharonclaire:

Don't get me wrong, I loved CC. There are really great supportive people on this site. I got a lot of information on diet and nutrition and exercise. But, losing weight is only one part of the equation. The real trick is keeping it off. 95% of dieters can't. That bothered me while I frequented this site. There is no real discussion @ how to be part of the 5%. This is understandable because so few people accomplish this. So, while here, I was reluctant to get too engrossed...I didn't want to lose it only to gain it back.

I went looking and found the psychology behind weight loss/food addictions in a book called Shrink Yourself. There may be others out there...someone has mentioned Jean Antonello. Losing the weight and keeping it off is really about changing ones orientation to food. I picked up the book a week ago. I am not thinking/worrying about food/consumption all day anymore. I am actually enjoying the food I eat now...every darn bite! I feel very relaxed because I know the weight will come off in time. I am eating sensibly. I love being able to focus on other things.

Hope someone can use this information. When you empower yourself, you can do anything! Goodbye to counting calories! Hello to eating sensibly and exercise and doing other things w/my life!

Its interesting you bring this up.  My over all plan has me counting calories well after I reached my weight loss goal.  As for eating sensibly I wish I could.  Seriously, but I don't.  The reality of my eating habits hit me like a ton of bricks when I first started calorie counting. I was eating nearly twice the amount of food I should have been eating. For example, instead of eating 4 oz of red meat ..I was eating a 12 oz porter house, with a salad that had olives and blue cheese dressing, and Texas toast. This is just one example of excess in my diet.  I wish I could say I could eat veggies, with no butter, and cut some carbs blah blah blah. I cannot. I have tried in the past.  So Strict portion control for the foods I love is working for me.  I can eat whatever I want and not feel bad.  Now at some point I hope to not have a desire for bacon mayonnaise sandwiches on white bread....but until then Calorie counting and exercise is my only defense.

but that's just the problem, weddingmama. you shouldn't have to count calories. it's hard to explain what SY does until you try it out yourself. I am not only NOT thinking of food much of the day now but I also don't miss it, don't crave it and don't worry about it. AND moments will go by that used to feel me w/angst and I'd be running for the kitchen. but now, there's just no need. I'm not even fighting habits or trying to stop myself. I am just not doing it.

Anyway, I know there are folks who successfully lose the weight and keep it off, like my own mother, w/o the help of cc or sy so I know it can be done. But I am psychology oriented and this works for me.

good luck to you, weddingmama. It sounds like you have found your way to be in the 5%! That's cool! :  )

Well sharonclaire I would have to admit I am a part of the 5% also since I have lost 40 pounds and kept it off for over a year with counting calories and even though I think about the food I never stress over it and I am almost always relaxed. I will have to admit that the only scientific way to lose weight is to have a calorie deficit, now that doesn't mean you must count the calories to lose the weight just eat less than you burn.

 

Regards,

Bay_wolf.

Is this an add? Posting about a self-help book on a site full of people who have successfully lost weight by calorie counting and exercise?

There isn't discussion on how to be in the 5% who keep it off because the entire site is about how to be the 5%.

The OP is correct that the way to keep it off is by changing one's approach to food.  Obviously the approach you had got you either over or underweight (for the ED end of the spectrum.)  The only way to permenantly adjust the weight is to adjust the approach, or you WILL gain it back.

But skookum said it exactly right.  The tools and methods of weight loss that this site promotes is all about putting you in that 5%.  Educating you about food, nutrients, portion sizes, appropriate calorie intake, appropriate exercise, etc.  Doing all those things almost inevitably changes your approach to food and diet.  Lord knows, mine has changed radically. I've been practicing the behaviors and habits that the 5% for over a year now, and that's how I'm losing weight.  Very slowly. 

And when I finally reach my goal, I'll be able to eat a little more.  Have "treats" a litte bit more often.  But all the behaviours and practices will remain the same.  And that will including the calorie counting, for at least the first 3-6 months of maintenance.  After that, we'll see.

I agree, this website is helpful in weeding out nutrition and exercise information that is useful. Of course the bottom line in weight loss is science: calories in/calories out. Not arguing that. You all appear to be in the 5% and what a happy thing for you. I found a gap here in information and felt fortunate that SY filled it. 95% of dieters, many of whom are here at cc (just read the chats...yoyo dieters/folks losing too quickly/eating disorders are all over these forums) will lose weight only to find that they gain again and are helpless as to why. Unfortunately, its an epidemic in the U.S. Not everyone is as enlightened as you all. Personally, I needed more information to fill in the gaps in order to make what I learned here (and other places) work for me. You all/your experience here doesn't represent everyone that visits this site. I would like to see CC incorporate books like this into their reference library. Skookum, you sound threatened...its just a book. lol Thanks for the discussion.

I think it's great you have found a comfortable way of eating food. I however will always be counting my intake, at least until I have a grasp on just how much I'm taking in by eyeballing it. I cannot think of one diet I haven't tried in the past 20 years. I even tried having confidence that I could just eat healthy food, and eat when I feel hungry, then stop at saiety. Nope! I ate my way up to 311 pounds by doing just that because I was taking way too much in and stop caring after I got over 200 pounds.

When I started counting my calories, I knew this was going to be my last chance to save myself. There is nothing else out there that is going to keep me THIS in check with myself. Yes, it's a pain in the butt to count what I put in my mouth, and it will be a pain for years to come, but if it continues to give me weight loss results like I'm seeing, put me back in the driver's seat of my life then I'll do it. If it keeps me from keeling over from high blood pressure or heart attack the way my dad did in his 40s, (I'm 40 now) it's worth all my effort.

No offense but I have been tormented with the whole, "You don't really have to mess with counting what you're eating" mindset. It has always landed me back into bad eating patterns.

***.....stands up and applauds Missfairfax***

whatever works for ya.  i say live & let live. 

Standing ovation for skookum :)

I am sorry missfairfax that you went through 20 years of diets. That is exactly what SY tries to avoid. I don't take offense at your comments. I know how difficult losing weight is and so I appreciate the reasons why you have chosen to stick w/CC as the right tool in your weight loss, missfairfax. As I said, I also got a lot of useful information from CC. However, I did not feel CC adequately addressed how to keep the weight off/why most people lose the weight only to gain it back again. I felt and still feel that SY successfully addresses this. Plus, the author addresses it in a way that makes counting calories unnecessary. 

As for the rest 'a ya', lol, I find your responses interestingly meaningless. I guess it takes less effort to type in meaningless stuff here than it does to pick up a recommended book that may prove to be beneficial. 

And posting those insults and back-handed compliments is committing the very thing you're accusing others of.

Frankly, CC is where I came to after I decided to make a lifestyle change. I already had been eating better, looking at food as fuel and exercising for fitness. I came here for help in measuring and getting complete nutrition. I think there are people who require mental health treatment before they are able to lose weight, eat healthy and make that final decision to live a healthy lifestyle. I'm one of them and some of my friends here also seek psych treatment. For us, CC is a tool and a place for fellowship. It isn't our therapist, though.

Yeah, there are fad dieters, and people with EDs looking for validation. However, as a rule, this site doesn't promote that at all. It promotes healthy eating and exercise.

The other day a veteran member returned to discuss how easy it has been to maintain his weight loss. There is a whole forum dedicated to maintenance. There are also references to studies about permanent/long-term weight loss here. So, I think your charge that CC doesn't support post-loss lifestyles is unfounded.

As for promoting a good book, I find it helps if you just talk about it as a good read. Telling a group that they're doing it wrong and you have a book with the answers is just insulting and you'll get a backlash. Doesn't matter how good the book is.

 

PS, while I was typing, you edited your response.  You changed the word "narrow" to "meaningless".  Okay 

Mrsdagle Thank YOu!!! 

I was about to post about the narrow comment.  I MEAN WTF??? I think because you read One book its pretty "meaningless" to get on a weight loss forum and ask why no one is supporting Maintaining.  HELLO WE ARE on the Weight loss part of our journey..at some point we'll want to learn about Maintaining our weight. When that time comes we'll go to the maintenance board..its that simple.

Original Post by sharonclaire:


As for the rest 'a ya', lol, I find your responses interestingly meaningless. I guess it takes less effort to type in meaningless stuff here than it does to pick up a recommended book that may prove to be beneficial. 

 You obviously don't understand the meaning of humor "lol" and your quote:  "....your responses interestingly meaningless..." is beyond insulting to the many intelligent, sophisticated, educated men and women on this site.  This is a forum for support, dear friend.  Please don't insult people you don't know and obviously have no intention getting to know.

It appears that this got pretty off track, then. lol

My message really was that this wonderful book has empowered me and I thought it might be useful to others. SY digs deep into the reasons WHY so many of us have food addictions and offers understanding on how to develop a healthy relationship with food, again w/o counting calories. By changing ones relationship to food there is no need for dieting/maintenance. It doesn't offer nutrition or exercise information and recommends that other sources s/b used for that. Fortunately, in my view, these are CC strengths.

I had no intention of trouncing fellowship. lol Quite simply, I felt empowered and thought this information should be shared.

silence? lol you all must be at the library...

Original Post by sharonclaire:

It appears that this got pretty off track, then. lol

My message really was that this wonderful book has empowered me and I thought it might be useful to others. SY digs deep into the reasons WHY so many of us have food addictions and offers understanding on how to develop a healthy relationship with food, again w/o counting calories. By changing ones relationship to food there is no need for dieting/maintenance. It doesn't offer nutrition or exercise information and recommends that other sources s/b used for that. Fortunately, in my view, these are CC strengths.

I had no intention of trouncing fellowship. lol Quite simply, I felt empowered and thought this information should be shared.

For you, the book may have been very helpful. For some of us, we desire the structure and do-it-yourself nature of CC. As we develop and change our attitudes towards food through utilizing this site, some of us decide we can go without counting after a while, others need the structure to help them change their habits to stay on track. For people like myself, using CC is a great way to experiment with how we eat (three meals vs. two small meals and several snacks a day) to see how it affects our metabolism.

If you thought the information should be shared, insulting the way that some of us have chosen to get a handle of our attitudes towards food by choosing this site was a rather tactless way to do it. Especially in your later comment of, "What, no responses? I guess you're all in the library [reading the book I'm trying to force down your throats]." Honestly, if you're trying to sell something, just mention how it's been helpful for you. Don't say that in so many words that "lol ur doin' it wrong."

As long as one develops a relationship with food that is healthy, there is no reason to believe that any method of self-help--whether it be this website, or a book--is the "wrong" method of choice. This site has helped me gather a greater understanding of how my body works when it comes to food--that's what I needed to know before really setting out to lose weight. Since I'll be on the weightloss aspect of my journey for quite some time (at least a year or two, as I plan on becoming pregnant after hitting my first goal weight--199--and will continue to eat healthier during my pregnancy, and will strive to lose whatever I gain from being pregnant, back down to my ultimate goal of 120), right now, it's the weightloss that's important to me. But you know what? I'm eating a number of calories that I may need to eat to maintain, once I get down to my ultimate goal. I will be adding exercise as I try to lose, because I like the amount of food I eat now.

The point of CC is to find something that works for you, that is healthy. It doesn't give you a one-way explanation. It lets you explore yourself and why you're addicted to food/addicted to not eating a DAMN thing, and lets you set up boundaries for yourself to keep you on track. For me, I prefer this and the community as the way to help me lose weight, as opposed to some book.

Maybe its just me but I have joined CC so that I never have to worry about maintaining weight after a diet again- I want to change my eating habits and learn what I should be consuming calorie wise, rather than the binge and starve (ok that's dramatic I never starve but you get what I mean) yo yo dieting.  I think Calorie counting should be a lifestyle rather than a diet.... therefore you never have to diet again...

ha ha for example I spent a day watching rugby with my boyfriends and his friends after I had just started CC and when I input my calories I realised I had consumed over 3000 (mostly in alcahol!!) Now I will be more mindful next time I go out!!

you can't consider this a "diet", its a lifestyle change