curiouser and curiouser

Hey everyone, so I have a pretty good question to ask here.  Why is that it's SO important to keep a 2000 calorie or (whatever calorie) diet or else  if you go below it you'll binge. Why do some people binge when they eat less and others don't?

For instance, I have friends who do NOT have eating disorders or anything like that at all and they eat 1 or 2 regular meal a day and never feel hungry. 

Or they don't binge like I would at the end of the night if I hadn't eaten a lot all day.  They don't think about food that much, while me on the otherhand..can't get food or the topic of weight off my mind.

I'm very intimidated by them sometimes.  I know I have to be healthy but to be surrounded by friends who are naturally so slim and happy and healthy yet don't eat a lot kind of triggers me.  It's a stupid reason to drop that group of friends too.  I don't know how to make myself feel better around them knowing I eat a lot more then they do. I feel like the fat one.  Ugh, it's just an awful feeling

Does anyone have similar complaints or problems?  Any advice here? Thank

I can help you with the first part.  Binge eating generally happens when your blood sugars drop so low your body goes into survival mode and the primitive action to _EAT_.  Your body thinks you are starving, and it makes sure you'll get enough calories to make sure that doesn't happen any time soon! 

To combat binge eating, eat a big and healthy breakfast.  This will sustain your blood sugars throughout the day.  If you ask any of your friends who are thin and don't binge eat, I bet you they are frequent breakfast eaters!  You can generally avoid binge eating by eating small meals frequently (maintaining blood sugars) which is also great practice for general weight management.

emzmcgee  - thanks for the reply but I've heard that all too many times before.  Some people use that strategy but it doesn't really work for me.

What does it feel like for people when their "blood sugars dropped too low" or they binge eat for other reasons?  Like, when you see that piece of food you want, what is the feeling actually like? Is it more robotic? Actual hunger? Thoguhts of "this will make me happy?" or thoughts of sadness? Do you get tense? short of breath? relaxed?

For me, I feel more robotic, and i tend to clench my jaw tight, and saliva forms in my mouth

many people binge for emotional reasons as well... stess, depression, boredom, anger, or even being happy ("hey i can eat this, i was good today") ie self reward.

yes your friends may eat just 1 or 2 meals a day and not have eating disorders, I know quite a few people like this, especially in my family... and guess what? quite a few of them are overweight. Yea people get confused as to why they are gaining weight when they don't "eat much", but when they do eat, their meals may actually contain enough calories, or more then they need daily... also keep in mind when people say "oh i have only eaten supper today" that does not include any beverages or snacks that they also could of ingested. which is where more of their calories may of came from.

if you are anything like me, the term 'binging' was never even discover UNTIL i had found this site... and after a while the constant thoughts of food, calories, dieting, etc just takes over your mind and that is all that you can think about... and binging just seems to be a common accurance.

think about it, when you were a kid and ate candy, did you ever once consider this as "binging"? my guess is no... you were young, you were having fun, maybe you were at a birthday party or something... all of these terms and regulations have been molded into your head, and the more you over think it the more likely it is to happen.

I would kill for the days when I was a kid again and could go about without a care in the world about all this eating, food, calorie nonsence, but I can't... once it gets stuck in your head it can't get out... it's like an addiction.

try to ease up on the emotional triggers.. find something productive to do... meditate, clean, excersize, go shopping, etc. just try to keep your mind off that unnessary pail of ice cream in your freezer... and if certain foods trigger you, then get them out of the house, now!

hope this helps

I think the nub of the problem is that you're telling yourself that enjoying food is 'wrong'... when it isn't.  Good food is one of the basic pleasures of life.   When you see a beautifully crafted (insert delicacy of choice)...... what shall we have?.....  fragrant strawberry shortcake, laden with fruit and quivering with whipped cream, teetering on a display in a baker shop you're meant to respond emotionally!  Unless you're made of wood you're going to salivate and find it desirable.  Not because it's brimful of wholesome nutrition and worthy vitamins... but because it's beautiful and delicious.  

Now of course at some point in our development we have to be able to say to ourselves... yes, it's beautiful and delicious but I'm not going to indulge at every single opportunity.   Self-restraint and intelligent discipline is what separates civilised adults from toddlers and other animals!  But it's emphatically not wrong to want it, to eat it or to enjoy it.

If your friends don't eat.... frankly, it's their loss.  Don't ever feel bad that you enjoy your food.

Hey there...I share your sentiments. I have friends that complain as much as I do about their weight but they're thin! They watch what they eat but on their "bad days" they have pizza, tiramisu, and cheesesteaks. My "bad days" I have too much popcorn or overindulged in triscuits. I know that it's probably a difference in  metabolism and genetics but it doesnt make it easier for me.

As for the binge eating.... I only "binge" when I restricted myself too much during the day or as an emotional outlet. The whole obsession with losing weight gets so frustrating at times that I just decide to eat half a box of cereal. In fact, my "bad days" barely hit 2200 calories.

I, too, am tired of constantly counting calories while others have no need. I'm trying to listen to my body and only eat when hungry, and stop when I'm full. I'm hoping I am successful now that I'm armed with the right information, exercise regularly, and healthy foods.

Just try to stay positive. You're not alone.

One of the things that really helped me accept that it's okay to enjoy your food was to step back and look at the calories rationally.  You didn't gain all your weight in one day right?  It was many days of eating more calories then you burned.  And if you had one good day, you didn't lose 10 lbs, it was a drop in the bucket.

Likewise when you look at it the other way.  If you consistanly eat less calories then you're burning, the weight comes off slowly, but surely - same way you put it on.  If you have one bad day....you don't gain 10 lbs, again it's just a drop in the bucket.

It's your overall eating patterns that matter.  Yesterday I had a burger and onion rings from Dairy Queen, and in the past, that would have thrown me into a guilty eating spiral with the mindset that I've already ruined my diet so I might as well eat whatever I feel like.  Now, I don't feel an ounce of guild about it.  I ate 2100 calories yesterday, and I didn't gain any weight. 

Today, I'm back on my normal eating program and I feel great.  I never feel restricted cuz if I really want something, I know I can eat it without the guilt.  And knowing I can, I don't crave it as much.  I used to crave junk food ALL the time because I knew I shouldn't eat it.  Now, it's not forbidden, so I don't want it as much lol.

It's a really hard point to get to and it took me years to get here, but don't lose faith, you'll get there too.  Just keep in mind that one day doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of thing

to answer your question binging is really a psychological thing,  like you already said, you think a lot about food whereas your friends don't.  the more you think when and what you should eat, restrict or not, it is disordered eating.