Dating a non-vegetarian?

How many of you who are vegetarian/vegan would or are be in a relationship with a non-vegetarian? I have been vegetarian since I was 11, and have casually dated meat eaters, but was only ever in 1 serious relationship-with a vegetarian.

Im now a vegan, and was single for awhile, and am just starting to get interested in someone new. I've been getting to know him and was delighted to find out he was a vegetarian- but horrified at my reaction somewhat, knowing i would be somewhat dissapointed/turned off by a meat eater.

Any experiences/thoughts you have on the subject?

Original Post by exsmail:

Wow, I never saw this as the same argument as the one I've had about religion countless times, but it is.  I think some people believe the that the only way to truly believe in something is to make others believe it too.  One can believe that Christianity is the only way to live or that vegetarianism is the only way to live.  Where it gets tricky is when one begins to talk about what's "kadosh" or "sacred."  So, if one is Christian, the only way to truly be a Christian is to separate oneself from anyone who isn't or to convert them.  Now we're talking about food or diet, and not religion.   Or are we.  Several people have brought up the morality of vegetarianism.  Is it inherent in your vegetarianism to make me be a vegetarian too?  I can see the case that it's easier to date a vegetarian.   But isn't it also easier to date someone who is of your same religion?  Yet if someone told me, "I only date people who are Christian, just because it's easier," I really wouldn't respect that person or their opinion.  I say, live and let live.  I live by my principles, and I don't mind sharing where my principles come from when someone wants to know.  Somehow, I just think it's wrong to consider ones-self as kadosh for any reason -- what they believe in or what they eat. 

By the way, I chose Christianity as it is the most popular religion in my area.  However this concepts to any faith that has an element of Kadosh or "holier than thou" traits.

 While I see what you're saying, I think certain traits can tell you a lot about a person.  Their religion means something and it says somethign about who they are.  I personally choose not to date conservative Christians because often times that means our very values are so different it's not going to work long term (me being an extremely liberal atheist).  I don't think that's being holier-than-thou, I think it's being practical.   At my age, I'm thinking about a partner in terms of marriage as well, which means I want to be with someone who holds the same values I'd want instilled in children.

So while I don't think someone's diet would be a "deal breaker" in a relationship for me, personally, I think it would be a factor, for sure. 

"Yet if someone told me, "I only date people who are Christian, just because it's easier," I really wouldn't respect that person or their opinion."

Yeah, but what if someone said "I only date people who are Christian (or vegetarian) because it is important to me that someone I get intimate and close to considers important the same values as me"?

I wouldn't date someone who is racist, because I don't beleive in that outlook on life and I wouldn't want to get close to someone who had that outlook. It's the same type of thing.

I don't know why everyone seems to have a problem with the ethical veg*ns and not the nutritional ones. Perhaps it's threatening?

because anyone who would give up meat based on anything other than health reasons is just too extreme and crazy

Right Right?

I've encountered the argument that the ethical reasons should not be mentioned on this website because it is a diet site. Therefore, only diet related issues should be mentioned.

But the ethical reasons are the biggest drive of why I'm vegan so it's hard to keep them separated

I dated an omni who stayed omni and I dated an omni who is now vegetarian and my personal preference would be to date a vegetarian. My bf and I live together and I wouldn't want my money to go to the purchase of meat. Even if I wouldn't eat it, I would have a problem with it. They say you vote with your dollar, right? So it just wouldn't make sense to me so if my bf was still omni, it would be tough for both of us. Especially since I do all the cooking. So I'm grateful that he decided to turn veg but if we were ever to break up I'd be looking for another vegetarian. But that's just my personal choice. Some people like blondes, I like vegetarians.

Oh my gosh, I've been wanting to talk about this for a while. I've been with this guy recently who loves to eat meat, and I've been a vegetarian for a few years. I'm totally fine with him eating meat, I can't judge another person BUT when we eat a meal and he has a steak or burger or something and afterwards he wants to kiss me I cringe and I still can't find the balls to tell him why I never want to make out after he's chowed down a bloody burger. EWWW!!!!

it is so much cheaper and easier when your living together if your botgh vegetarians! I hate the taste of meat and it wasn't fabulous in my past relationships kissing the guy after he'd eaten meat especially if he'd had bacon.

Original Post by edamame3:

About the holier than thou mentality:

For those of us who are vegan or vegetarian because we don't support the unecessary killing of another being, it is difficult to just accept a prospective partner's viewpoint as a simple 'difference'. It is actually a completely different world view in that case, and thus may not be able to be reconciled. It's a lot bigger of an issue than it seems to the outsider, especially if you don't understand the moral/ethical/spiritual component.

 I understand the moral/ethical/spiritual component.  I just don't agree.  Funny how, no matter the topic, if someone doesn't agree then they must not understand.  Poor souls.  X(

I have been with my husband for seven years and became vegan during that time period. As vegans/vegetarians we have to understand that our convictions are our own, and not push them on others. I feel good that I can save the lives of many animals every year, but not everyone believes the way we do. If you love the person, in my opinion, this is a small issue that can be worked out. As long as there are animals, people are going to be eating them.

I used to, pretty steadily, date a meat-eater. However I wasn't a vegetarian before we started to date so when I switched over he got pretty weirded out and asked all sorts of typical questions like:

"How are you going to get protein and iron?"

or

"What about Vitamin B12, it's only in meat you know..."

and whenever our friends talked about it he would always say something along the lines of "I could never stop eating meat" and "I don't believe in those half-baked studies on how meat is bad for you because we're omnivores so we can eat meat".

So for awhile we just did our own thing in terms of food, he would be considerate that I don't eat meat and I wouldn't say anything about him eating it but it really changed the relationship, especially after I became vegan. It wasn't obvious at first but after awhile... I dunno it just changed. After all I stopped eating meat for ethical and spiritual reasons before health reasons (even though that was another big factor but for me to take the step had to be for other reasons than my weight).

Though people say diets are a very small part of people's lives, I don't think so. I get pretty upset when people negatively criticizes how I choose to live and I think people who eat meat are also offended when vegans/vegetarians criticize meat. (Which will be inevitable when people ask me why I decided to become a vegan).

A lot of time I spend with my boyfriend will be when we eat since I'm always busy since I'm in college and I have work... so it is definitely different. I don't mind dating a meat-eater since I've been there, done that and I totally understand but I can't date anyone who can't respect my point of views and thinks I'm a freak with food.

when i met my husband he was not a vegan, I just cooked up some food for him and he switched, I never saw him eat meat. It would have turned me off. Im sure of it, but I wasnt going to try to force him to change either. But I know our relationship is stronger and less complicated since we eat the same. Especially since we now have kids!!!

It shouldn't be based soley on the fact if the person is a vegan or not.   I know some of us like to date other vegetarians though!I also found this site for [url=http://www.singlevegetarians.com/]Single Vegetarians & Vegans[/url]. It's called SingleVegetarians.com. It was a free and easy sign up and I found some singles in my area right away.  Good Luck guys and gals!

My boyfriend started dating me knowing that I am a pescatarian. He is a meat-eater and never challenges my eating habits. When I cook, I cook vegetarian or pescatarian meals, and he happily eats them. He orders his meat when we go out, but he also likes to try a bite of whatever I'm having if its something new to him. He tried tofu the other night, and enjoyed it! I'm thinking he may possibly be on the road to vegetarianism in the future, if I can ever get him to dislike steak ;)

I am a perscatarian and my husband is a meat-eater and we eat well together. I love cooking and he loves eating so I usually make meals that are all vegertarian or sometimes use various seafoods. He never complains about not having meat to eat, and if he wants it he will make it himself. When we go out we try to always get things we can share. Since he eats more I usually make a large amount of starch for him like pasta, rice or potatoes to help fill him up. It also helps me eat less carbs if he's chowing down on most of them.