depression question

i don't really know if this is the right forum to be posting this in, but hopefully you guys might be able to help me. I've been feeling really depressed for a while but have been to afraid to tell anyone that i need help.

i've been trying to reach out to my mom in small ways, but she just shrugs it off and says to me jokingly "well, don't feel that way." it is beyond frustrating and unhelpful when she does that. i feel really afraid to tell her, especially now that i found out that another family member is physically sick.

i don't really know what to do. i feel awful, and i've been doing this weird thing the past few weeks where i can make myself cry at almost any instant. it feels bad.

if any of you guys had advice for me on what to do, it would be a big help. thanks!

Hi Nicole. As someone who suffered from severe depression during her teenage years, I can assure you that you are not alone and you should not be ashamed. Your affliction is as real as other, more tangible, "physical" illnesses - whether your mother would agree or not. She just may not know how serious your sadness is if you don't tell her. The most important thing right now is finding someone to talk to, be it a school counselor or nurse - they can help you find ways to approach the topic with your mom. The goal should be finding a psychologist who suits you and with whom you feel comfortable; depending on your age, you will need your mother's help in doing this. I recommend having a talk with your mom when she's relaxed and not preoccupied - open up and tell her how you feel and that you're concerned for yourself and hope that she'll help you find help. Mothers are there for this sort of thing!

I am not the best person to give advice, but I can tell you what I did for depression by personal experience. When I get depressed over things its usually because of my diet. If I don't eat enough veggies or fruit I become extremely tired and sad. I start to think all these crazy thoughts and even cry alot. As soon as I eat alot of vegges/fruit my "spirit" seems to instantly pick up. This may not be the case for you, but try it out and see if it works. Good luck with everything!

Original Post by nicole312:

i don't really know if this is the right forum to be posting this in, but hopefully you guys might be able to help me. I've been feeling really depressed for a while but have been to afraid to tell anyone that i need help.

i've been trying to reach out to my mom in small ways, but she just shrugs it off and says to me jokingly "well, don't feel that way." it is beyond frustrating and unhelpful when she does that. i feel really afraid to tell her, especially now that i found out that another family member is physically sick.

i don't really know what to do. i feel awful, and i've been doing this weird thing the past few weeks where i can make myself cry at almost any instant. it feels bad.

if any of you guys had advice for me on what to do, it would be a big help. thanks!

She is your mother.  Sit her down and have a serious talk with her.  She may think your initial words were just normal hormones.  But if you sit her down and tell her HOW you are feeling and how it shadows your life, she may listen.  Ask her to take you to the Dr and explain to him/her as well. 

Everyone can use a professional therapist to talk to at some point in their lives.  This might be your point. 

Your mom is a big girl....she can take a family member being sick and also take news that you may have depression.  Dont worry about overwhelming her.  You are her daughter, not her keeper.  She is your mother and will handle it all very well.

Good luck.

Can you identify the fears you have for reaching out more? I suffered through my teens and as an adult with severe depression etc. You deserve more support and sometimes it can be hard for family members to understand that it is not as easy to just push through. Getting on meds and self help skills and or therapy can aid in a better life. Can you sit your mom down but state what you need in more direct terms? For ex Mom I am struggling and would like to see a therapist or psychiatrist? I need more help to get out of this as I have tried and I feel stuck. These are just some thoughts and sometimes being vague is not enough. I understand your frustration as many of my family members did similar. Can you identify any reasons in specific why you are feeling depressed? Sometimes the cause is unknown but sometimes for ex school or friends can be part of this and getting support with those issues can help.

nicole, find someone to listen to you.  Family is the hardest people to understand how you are feeling.  You didn't say how old you are, if your in school seek the help of your guidance counslers, teachers, pastor or talk to your family doctor.  Find someone to listen to you,   If you are an adult make an appt. with your doctor.  What ever your age do not be afraid to seek help from someone.  Crying all the time is not a normal thing to do without reason.  I suffer from severe depression and when I am down I will cry over nothing.  I also feel sad and have negative thinking.  I see a therapist now, and I am on meds..  There is help out there, it's just having the courage to seek it.  I am also a mom and sometimes a mom has to hear "mom, I need help". Just that straight.  We as moms don't want to think of our kids being sad or hurt.  We can put blinders on.

I will be thinking of you, Karen

Hi Nicole and everyone else. 

I seem to be"suffering" from the same thing right now.  I've been on Lexapro for a while now but I think I need to explore something further.  I can't explain the source of my depression and I have NO visible reason for it so it's hard for me to get a hold of.  I know that sometimes people you reach out to have so much on their plates that they tend to brush you off because they feel that you're much stronger than this and you will get thru this.  "Pull yourself up by the bootstraps, get a good night's sleep, put your negative energy into something useful, etc. etc."  Or they just can't bear the thought that there is also something "wrong" with you for them to deal with . . . denial.  Whatever the reason, the fact that we recognize that we need to do something to help ourselves is the first step.  Reaching out here, sweetie, is a huge step.  What do you need next?  What you're experiencing is real.  Tell us what would make you feel better . . . please.

Thanks everyone. It really helps to hear that what I feel is legitimate, and I think I'm going to try talking to her this weekend. You guys have all been so helpful and nice about everything, and it's making me feel better about trying to fix this, so thanks again!