difference between men and women...this "wonders" me
Some background info...my husband's done triathlons for a few years. He's lessened his training due to a bad shoulder and, hence, has gained some weight - not much, but the difference IS noticeable. Being a "good wife" (I try) I haven't mentioned it.
Anyway...we finally got some nice weather here so my husband pulls out a pair of shorts (from last year) and puts them on - they're too tight. So he says, "These stupid shorts shrunk!" I had to leave the room so he wouldn't see how high my eyebrows shot up my forehead. It totally reminded me of this:
http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/ 08/mirror-image-perceptions.jpg
Why is it that we women are so hard on ourselves and men (in general) are not? In most species it's the male that does the preening, puffing, chest-pounding, etc. to impress. Why isn't it like that with us?
Original Post by gi-jane:
My (admittedly sweeping generalisation) experience of a lot of men is that they can only function if they believe themselves to be near enough perfect.
This statement made me wonder if you know my boyfriend in real life..
Women are taught from childhood the importance of their looks in our culture. From bedtime stories where a big fuss is made over someone being the "fairest or them all" to all the media images of men competing for the "hot chick", images of beautiful women in both women's and men's magazines, etc. I recently saw a Bally's ad in a restroom that read "No one says check out the personality on her". This all serves to reinforce to many women that they must diligently monitor their appearance.
Men on the other hand, are taught from early on that what they do or how much they make is important. Men have some degree of concern over their appearance, particularly where hair loss may be concerned, but in general they're not taught it's as important that they MUST be good looking as women are. But by the same token I have noticed men will get jealous of another guy who women find more attractive, though they'll show it by mocking the guy.
Original Post by trhawley:
Original Post by muttlover:
I live in Miami. Most guys in their late teens to thirties wear nice clothes, have many different pairs of shoes, many different 'accessories' (belt buckles, sunglasses).
My boyfriend must have... thirty different pairs of shoes/sandals, at least 10-15 different watches, at least 10 pairs of sunglasses, who knows how many belt buckles... And in his fraternity, he is one of the 'less flashy' people.
I mean it's nice to see guys caring about what they wear and looking nice, but sometimes I feel like I'm competing... with men?
Is he a Phi Alpha Gamma?
See, like what I was saying. This is the first kind of implication leveled when a man hears of another man being attractive. They ARE competitive about it.
Original Post by coffincritter:
Men have some degree of concern over their appearance, particularly where hair loss may be concerned, but in general they're not taught it's as important that they MUST be good looking as women are.
Every male under the age of 30 that I know is worried about how they look. From weight, to the clothes they wear. They just arent "allowed" to talk about it outside of close friends (or else people will begin to question their sexual orientation, like trhawley)
Original Post by loriklorik:
Original Post by coffincritter:
Men have some degree of concern over their appearance, particularly where hair loss may be concerned, but in general they're not taught it's as important that they MUST be good looking as women are.
Every male under the age of 30 that I know is worried about how they look. From weight, to the clothes they wear. They just arent "allowed" to talk about it outside of close friends (or else people will begin to question their sexual orientation, like trhawley)
This. And I think men are less vocal in general about it.
