My Dilemma

I have a problem and need some suggestions from you guys.

I am looking for a career change because i don't like my current job. To change careers, I have to study some computer programs and prepare my portfolio. 

Now, I am in the middle of moving out from my current place and I have two options.

1- to stay in a really nice and safe apt. ( I won't be able to save any money in this case).

2- to share with other people and it won't be comfortable enough. but I will be able to save money.

I can't decide which one is more important for me now to help me focus on my study. the question now, which one should be given a pirority? a peace of mind in my apt to study and enjoy a peaceful environemnt or saving more money in case I change jobs?

I am a bit nervous and they need a decision today.

thanks

Why won't option 2 be comfortable enough?

If you're worried about option 2 because you won't have a calm, peaceful study environment, how close is your nearest public library?  Can you study at the library at school?

I always lived with raucous, rowdy roommates, but I did well in school because I got into the habit of studying outside the house.  This has many benefits, not the least of which being that it eliminates opportunities to procrastinate.  I know that if I try to study at home, I will do anything other than studying in order to avoid it, such as cleaning house or doing yardwork.  My solution was to make a specific time and place for studying.  Mine was the library - maybe you'd prefer a coffeehouse or something.

Just a thought, since I think saving money is very important!  If the new place with roommates is in a safe enough neighborhood, and you can find a place to study outside the home, I think it'd be better.

If you decide to go with option 2, you could continue your apartment search for an option 3 that is better than option 2 but not as expensive as option 1

There is a great deal to be said for having your own little oasis of calm...however; you can make your own even in a shared housing situation.  Personally, I'm perfectly comfortable sharing living space as long as I have my own bedroom no matter how small.  I do not care to share a bedroom unless I'm intimately involved with the person and even then there are territorial issues for me.

Do you know these other people at all?  Have they described their living situation so that you know their standard habits?  Are the reasonably clean in communal areas?  Do any of them keep odd hours that might wake you up?  Are they in the habit of brining home a variety of guests?  If they do bring home guests, do they leave those guests at large in the place or do they leave when they leave?

In a shared living situation, house rules are important so that everyone has a general idea of what courtesies to expect and what to extend.  Most people I can live with reasonably well, but there are some that I find too obnoxious to share any kind of space with.  The bad housemates that I've had have had significant others who lived with their parents/grandparents and were over all the time and loud.  Or those who constantly left stinky messes in the kitchen.  Smoking also doesn't work for me.  Or those who would move my stuff from the communal space while cleaning up into a pile in front of my door while leaving their stuff all over the place.  Also those who come home in the middle of my sleep cycle and aren't reasonably quiet about it.  Equally lovely are those who feel that cleaning is not something they should have to do.

If you're going to school, are you more likely to study at home or in the library?  Would you have a study group over to your place?  You're currently in a shared situation right now, aren't you?

Original Post by pavlovcat:

Why won't option 2 be comfortable enough?

1- there is no kitchen. It is a women residence. there is one big kitchen only in the entire building ( about 200 rooms). I don't know if I will be able to cook my healthy meals in that case. well, I can but it is hard.

2- I am tired of living with other people. I have been sharing my current place with other women and it was not comfortable.

3- there is a long waiting list and they dont know when a room will be available. I have three months to move out unless I have to beg the management to stay longer in my current place. In this case, the nice apt will be gone. the broker is really pushing me to pay the money today because they don't want to hold the apt.

The broker is really pushing you to pay the money today because they want your money.  If they had another guaranteed renter already lined up they probably would not be waiting for you, they'd go with whomever is actually ready.

I think that I would find living with 200 women to be a bit uncomfortable.  On the other hand, being able to save up would probably make it worthwhile to me.  I was thinking that you were looking into an apartment with a couple of housemates or something.

That's rough.  The uncertainty of knowing whether I'd be able to get a room in the women's residence would have me in the nice apartment.  However, the feeling of relief you'll have with money in the bank might be worth a little uncertainty on the front end.

saf, you have a long history of posting questions when you've already decided on the answer.  it's pretty clear that you're going with option 1 (the place with no oven, right?).  if this were really a dilemma, you wouldn't have written off option 2 with the phrase "not comfortable enough."

if you're looking for a way to rationalize option 1, here it is: option 1 will give me the privacy to focus on my studies and a kitchen--albeit small--to prepare healthy meals.  when i'm finished my course work, i'll be qualified for the better job, so savings won't be so important.

there.  you can thank me later.

in my current residence, I have a sink and I can wash my face in the morning. I can boil some water to make some coffee. in the new residence, there is no sink in the room. there is a bathroom in every floor, and that is where I should go every morning just to wash my face. 

I have lived in my current residence for four years and I have seen all different kinds of  women. At one point, I had to deal with some nasty women who were like a gang. I wasted a lot of mental energy on that. 

now, I feel like I need a place just to heal and relax. 

the broker is pushing me to pay her because she said that apt is a very good deal ( actually it is.) and with that price, she can get another client who will take this right now.

Original Post by pgeorgian:

saf, you have a long history of posting questions when you've already decided on the answer.  it's pretty clear that you're going with option 1 (the place with no oven, right?).  if this were really a dilemma, you wouldn't have written off option 2 with the phrase "not comfortable enough."

if you're looking for a way to rationalize option 1, here it is: option 1 will give me the privacy to focus on my studies and a kitchen--albeit small--to prepare healthy meals.  when i'm finished my course work, i'll be qualified for the better job, so savings won't be so important.

there.  you can thank me later.

pg :) I swear. you make me smile. like I said, I am nervous. that is all. 

don't you feel nervous when you make improtant decisions?? 

by the way, thank you in advance:)

i sometimes feel nervous when i make important decisions, but i always know what i want :)

I also know what I want :) but don't you agree that sometimes we can't have what we want? I am just afraid to regret it later. 

still nervous.

Sounds like you are choosing between [what equates to] a dorm, and an apartment.

If you aren't into communal living, go with the apartment, and try to economize in other ways as best you can.  :)

Maybe find a studio apartment?

Original Post by safina1:

I also know what I want :) but don't you agree that sometimes we can't have what we want? I am just afraid to regret it later. 

still nervous.

You can always have what you want if you work hard enough!  And if you don't believe it, don't tell me, and let me live in my delusional state because I like it here.  (I always think of Tim Gunn in my head saying "make it work!")

Would you not be able to save at ALL in option 1?  If so, I would say that it is clearly a bad option -- saving is important.  If the answer is "I won't save as much as I want" perhaps find small ways to cut back and save more money.  

If it were me? I'd go with option 1 and probably ditch cable, or some other expense to help save.  I can't do that shared living thing... roommates are one thing, but a dorm-like situation isn't even an option anymore  :(

good luck!

LOL. I am talking about a studio apt:) but this is NYC. you could pay the same price to rent a one bed apt in another area. 

another thing. why does that broker want me to pay her before even running a credit check or signing a lease? I don't have experience dealing with them. so please advise when should I pay her? 

Good question.  Do you know if the broker's reputable?  Why wouldn't you deal with the apartment complex' management directly?

Original Post by purespark:

Good question.  Do you know if the broker's reputable?  Why wouldn't you deal with the apartment complex' management directly?

yeah, the broker's company is reputable.  they won't give me the owner's info. in fact, I haven't met the owner at all. we just met with the broker of the building. that is all.

Original Post by safina1:

LOL. I am talking about a studio apt:) but this is NYC. you could pay the same price to rent a one bed apt in another area. 

Ooh. Drats. :(

I'm not sure, but check out these links.  From what I've been reading, a broker is a much easier method of finding a decent place, kind of like a rental real estate agent.  Otherwise you have to spend a lot of time going from building to building and pounding the pavement.

http://manhattan.about.com/od/findanapartment /a/rentalcostsnyc_3.htm

http://manhattan.about.com/od/findanapartment /a/apartmentcheck.htm