Disheartened, Frustrated, Panicked, 1 week in Maintenance!

As the title would suggest my first week in maintenance has gone horribly.  Ive been floating around my target between 125-130lbs on and off for months now, last week I hit 125lbs and to co incide with moving home to my parents (where I always eat more) I decided I would finally let myself maintain and not try to lose anymore, so Easter weekend I had upped my calories naturally..  not even to maintenance level as I wanted to ease myself into it, so really getting about 200 extra calories.. well my body hates me and those extra calories may as well be multiplied by a thousand as of this morning (one whole official week in maintenance) I am up 9 lbs! Needless to say I am totally torn between restricting those few hundred calories again and wanting to live a little more on the wild side.. Im studying right now, so cant afford to spend any extra time on exercise to off set the extra cals. I guess Im just looking for advice from someone who's been there, Ive been working since last June to get from my weight this morning (134lbs) to my weight just over a week ago (125lbs), how can it all have been for nothing. As i say,

Disheartened, frustrated, Panicked,

C 

BUMP for you x

125lbs (8st 13lbs) for someone 5'10" was clinically underweight i.e. unwell.   You will only have got to that weight by either severely undereating or overexercising.   Hoping to maintain that weight was therefore completely unrealistic and pretty foolish.   Your body doesn't hate you.  On the contrary, it's looking after you.  It doesn't want to be sick and therefore it will take any increase in calories and use it to repair itself... i.e. by getting you back up to a healthy weight. 134lbs is a BMI of 19.3.... a 'normal' healthy weight is between BMI 20 and 25 and 'clinically underweight' kicks in below BMI 18.5

When someone who is clearly very, very slim thinks they are fat and is 'disheartened, frustrated, Panicked' the way you are then there is something seriously wrong with the way that person sees themself.  If someone starves themselves to the point that they are clinically underweight, something is clearly wrong.   Despite your claim that you "love good food, wine and a chat" (from your profile) do talk to your doctor as you are exhibiting quite a lot of the symptoms of disordered eating.  And that's a miserable and slippery slope to embark on.

In addition to gi-jane's concerns, it bothers me that you say you don't have any muscle tone, etc. Controlling only your calories and ignoring the rest of your body's health needs is a recipe for disaster. 

You're right that you need to only be maintaining - not losing. You might even need to be gaining. Please don't worry about 'easing into it', go ahead and set yourself at least at a maintenance level. 

Please go ahead and see either a doctor or a nutritionist to find out exactly what your body needs. 

so what happened?

was it water weight or what.
just curious because i wanna figure out what weight i can try to start maintenance at.  (like aim for 5 pounds under my goal, to be safe)?

To get back to you, sorry Ive been back on the weight loss forum as this maintaining just isnt happening, Im staying put +5lbs even though Im back trying to lose those last few, I just think this is my situation forever more.. I am on low calories during the week, I can splurge a little at weekends and I can expect to lose 0.5lbs-1lb and bounce between 128-130lbs

good luck to you.