does your doc ever make you feel stupid

my psychiatrist and psychologist are great they really are... but my GP-well she's a bit of a cow. she's young maybe 6 or 7 yrs older than me (im 24). but i feel so stupid after i talk to her. the talk is usually mental health related as unfortunately that what im sickest with. There were probs regarding self harm and feeling very suicidal at one point (hope im not breaking forum rules here). these-while not elimated-are very much reduced in favour of "better" coping skills.

however her vibe to me is that im an idiot. and regardless of what i ask (physical or mental), her response seems very : well because of everything thats going on in your head thats bound to happen.

i called this evening (i had not spoken to her in a while), about meds. i felt her tone cut my self esteem from beneath me. she often sneers at me if i have found myself in the position of having to ask for help at my lowest. she declares her "disappointment" in me if i have hurt myself and she went so far as to say at one point "when i saw the note about self harm (from a diff doc) i just said to myself we are going in circles and nothing is really going to improve here". i felt as though i was crushed. i cant express how ashamed i felt to be such a burden. i wished the world would open and swallow me whole.

what makes this so difficult is that right now i need some support. iv made great strides with my head and health lately but it comes at the cost of being exposed and vulnerable. i want some support and encouragement that i am doin the right thing. and though i do not like her-she has intimate knowledge of my medical (and psychiatric) past and i feel she knows me.

is it worth making a move to see another doctor. i am afraid to find another in the same practice for fear that this one will bad mouth me and shame me further...... perhaps suggesting that "you dont want to go there with that girl" to other doctors.

sorry for strange post. feel very disheartened and ashamed tonight.

It really sounds like you should consider finding a different doctor.   There is no excuse for her making you feel bad.

It sounds like she might hindering your recovery. It would be worth it to visit another doctor. They're not all like her. Maybe call the front office and see if you can pick up a copy of your file...she doesn't need to know anything and you can always go back if you change your mind. Since you know how to use a computer, check out reviews on other docs in your area. I think there was one called Health Grades or something but there might be others.

Ask yourself if your kid were in the same situation as you, what would you advise them to do?

Congrats on your recovery so far and good luck in the future. My fiance overcame something similar and he said that he doesn't look back anymore, only forward.

Original Post by fidget84:

is it worth making a move to see another doctor. i am afraid to find another in the same practice for fear that this one will bad mouth me and shame me further...... perhaps suggesting that "you dont want to go there with that girl" to other doctors.

sorry for strange post. feel very disheartened and ashamed tonight.

Yes, it is worth seeing another doctor because you are worth it. Make whatever adjustements you need to in order to feel secure and supported. Sounds like you have made great strides.  Don't let anyone stand in your way of going further.

Seriously, you should get a new doctor.

When i was diagnosed with AN, i got sent to a private doctors surgery coz that was where the only female doctor was available. Now i understand she was trying to scare me into eating but the fact she had seen me for about 10min made it a bit extreme. She told me my boyfriend would break up with me because if he decided to take me out to dinner i wouldn't eat (although we hadn't been out to dinner yet as of that time), my parents would disown me (they are the ones that made me go so its quite the opposite) my friends would leave me because the skinnier i got, the more competition i would be seen as (???) and that i would die. So i understand her reasoning but it was a bit extreme. She said she could give me some medicine for the "thoughts in my head" but mum refused. Then she referred me to a "great mental psychologist", her husband. So i left and never went back.

Before her i had a great female doctor who was young but understood me. She was only down for a few months. I felt i could connect with her better than anyone else, probably because she listened to me and didn't make me do anything eg. the psych told me i had to eat but she told me that how about i find a food that i could eat without feeling guilty and just try to eat it as much as possible. For me it was green apples so i lived off about 5 of those a day and then we progressed to another food. Sure it was slow but i was improving and i didn't feel suffocated or forced into anything.

You should find a new doctor that makes you feel comfortable and someone you want to see not dread :)

You should definitely see a new doctor. I am where you are right now and i know how low it can make you feel. You need help understanding and coping with these thoughts and feelings - that takes time and most importantly understanding. What makes me angry is that you can almost expect to feel that way if you try and talk to someone who doesn't understand your issues but when it comes to a supposed professional? There is no excuse for what she is doing to you or making you feel. I am fortunate to have someone who understands suicidal thoughts and severe depression and treats it with compassion. Please i urge you find someone new they are not all like that i promise.

And never feel ashamed for what you are feeling - now i just need to take my own advice it does get better though - honestly xxx

DEFINITELY get a new doctor! You deserve to be treated with respect no matter what health problems you have...

Breaking free from your issues is SO important, that even if you have to question ANYTHING in the SLIGHTEST that could be hindering your progress, then DITCH IT; get a new doctor.

The fact you have said anything at all in this nature indicates that she is not a good fit for you.