Doeas your husband/boyfriend encourage you?

I'm just wondering if I'm alone.

When I first started eating right and going to the gym, my husband was really encouraging to me. Now i'm 2 months into it and he's started making the "you spend too much time at the gym" type comments. I got to the gym at night, my child is in bed, and my husband is doing his homework. I spend about 40 minutes on cardio nights (that includes driving too and from home) 4 times a week. Then 3 times a week I spend 1 hour to 1 hour 15 minutes. In that time i've lost 10+ pounds and dropped a pant size! YOu might think that he would be happy to be getting his Hot wife back!! Sure there are times when he definitely likes my new body. I just don't understand it sometimes. I love exercise! He hates it! I wish I understood him.

My boyfriend isnt supportive either! I mean, he is supportive of me losing weight but does nothing to show his support. Eating together is one of our favorite things to do (hence the fat me) But my family is all obese and has slow metabolisms, while his is all small with fast metabolisms. He is 22 though and all that crap food is catching up to him.

I actually think my dieting as pushed us away from eachother a little bit. Because he refuses to eat like I do. He says 'he would starve!' So we never eat together anymore. He doesnt even bother looking at calories, so most of the time he thinks he's eating something healthy, its not. for instance, he likes hot dogs, so as a 'healthier' option he bought turkey sausage and wheat buns. Well each wheat bun had over 300 calories in it, and the portion of sausage he used may have been healthier than the beef version, but had over 400 calories, 40 grams of fat, and TONS of sodium. He ate half my daily allowance in one sitting!

We also like to go out to eat and its always an arguement. He is italian, so loves italian food and ALWAYS wants to eat it but lately we never go because of me. We also used to eat chinese food 3 times a week and pizza very often and all of that is gone too. So he gets frustrated but I try to tell him that once this weight is off of me we can eat those things more often because I wont have to restrict so much.

yes my bf is very encouraging... maybe because he wants to lose a few pounds and be healthier as well.... in the beginning he would be encouraging but if i said i wanted cookies he was all for it.... now though, he'll put his foot down and suggest a different snack... well most times anyway :P  we keep each other on track for the most part and are always coming up with new different healthy things we can eat... we both want to exercise but can be lazy with it so on the weekends we love to go hiking/walking...

i can see how it would be frustrating if your not both at the same place at the same time.... your husband isn't going to the gym and exercising, so he might not really "get it" ... maybe he hates the gym so he doesn't understnad why you want to be there... maybe he's jsut jealous of time away... maybe he's worried you'll want other guys/they'll want you... who knows! i guess my biggest suggestion would be to find foods and activities that you like together... even if it's not an everyday thing... maybe you both like going for walks after dinner... maybe there's some foods you both really like... whatever it is, see what you can do together, but there's nothing wrong with doing things on your own for you!

 

Thankfully I now have a very supportive husband. When we were dating I was about 150lbs and lost a dramatic amount of weight a few months later down to 115lbs. He said he loves me and I'm beautiful at any weight (currently 131lbs). Although he does still bring junk food into the house occasionally he understands that we need to be healthy. Since I've been doing most of the cooking lately he will eat whatever I put in front of him and thanks me for every meal.

As far as him telling you "you spend too much time at the gym" I think men have a tendency to act like babies when they aren't receiving 100% of your attention. Mine did the same thing a few years ago and once we talked it out he admitted that he was jealous I was spending time away from him and would rather have me home. God forbid I didn't spend every waking hour doting on him and serving his every need. Women need time for ourselves and should never be made to feel guilty about taking it!

Some of your stories made me want to cry!  They reminded me of being with my ex who was not supportive of anything, let alone my working out.  I think he feared I'd leave him when I realized I looked hot. 

Boyfriend now is the one who gently nudged me in this direction. He is incredibly healthy and I slowly picked up his habits.  He loved me at my heaviest and told me I was beautiful often enough that I started to believe him.  I started working out so I could be strong enough to keep up with him while hiking and biking.  The most important thing though is that he helped me work out my issues with food (all or nothing) and taught me to treat food as fuel for my body rather than treats to sooth the daily hurts and stresses. 

my husband is wonderful because he never commented or implied anything about my need to lose weight but just went along with my new eating habits and I really do think he is proud of me...however, that being said...he pulled out the question last night " so are you gonna start just working out at nights?"  .  This is because the last two days have been hectic for me having 3 young kids at home that I didnt have a chance to workout in the daytime.  So his comment was more a statement to say "what the hell are you doing this at night for when you have all day to do it?"  That being said any of you out there tried to use an elliptical machine or weights with a two and four year old around...merely impossible...needless to say, I usually wait until my son is down for his sleep and I can give my daughter a show or a craft to play with and get my workout done....enough said ...sorry it was soooo long!!

My boyfriend was super negative at first, not about my losing weight, but about how I was going about it.  I have always crabbed about my weight in the seven years we have been together, but save for a little before I graduated high school (I lost 15 lbs, but slowly put it back on my freshman year of college), I never did anything about it, which I think bugged him.  I have always heard from all my guy buddies that the most annoying and unattractive thing a girl can do is complain about her weight.  It makes them a)think that their girl is fishing for compliments or b)notice any weight gain that has appeared.

I really do think that the weight I gained in my pregnancy (wasn't very much, but it STAYED with me and was the most I weighed in my life) bothered him a little because it made me feel very unattractive and a bit depressed, therefore robbing him of the girl he knew before and replaced her with a bloated, out of shape B. 

However, since I have taken my weight loss seriously (counting calories, working out 6 days a week, eating super healthy), he really has started to respect my goals a little more.  We have started eating healthier together, which is actually really great for all three of us.  He is thin and trying to add muscle, so he is also working out 5-6 days a week (although his is done in 20 minutes, while I am still huffing and puffing!).

We have had some ups and downs about my weight and weight loss throughout our relationship, but I feel that we are at a place now that is comfortable for the both of us.  We encourage each other more by giving each other space and time to work out seperately, rather than try together.  He still has his french fries and pizza, but I am not jealous anymore!

At first he was not supportive of my diet...told me to quit, and that he didn't want me to, etc.

It's not as though he's 100 percent okay with it, but he deals with it and tries to talk about it when I want to.

He's just afraid that I'm going to obsess over it and become too skinny, and to be frank, he likes my chest for sexual reasons, and he's very afraid I'm going to lose it and we won't be able to....yeah...I'm going to stop myself there. Sorry.

Also he gets sad whenever I have to go to work-out. We're doing the long-distance thing because he went to college a year earlier than I, so we usually try to spend a lot of time on the phone, and the decrease in phone time has gotten him down.

Nope.  He doesn't support me.  Mostly he talks about the surgery I HAVE to have once I've got all the weight off.  Because, "who wants to look at That?"  A-hole!

My husband supports anything that I want to do, as long as I'm happy. He supports me being a chunky monkey and lazy, he supports me training for a marathon and losing 89 lbs... anything that I want he supports. I'm very lucky!

My muscle head husband -he supports me, when i suddenly gained 30 lbs last summer- out of the blue-- and I just couldn't take it after we got married in Sept-- i started working out after 10+ years of not working out- now it's my life- he's the one who started me on the weight training-- i had the basics down but asked him questions, he showed me- when my muscles grew & guys at the gym started to notice me? uhhh, my darling husband is very insecure & jealous-- but he puffs his chest proud when i give him a peck at the gym  to show that I am HIS wife--

Food wise? my dear husband is a muscle head with a gut - a growing gut-- and he eats garbage AND crap -- 8 cokes a day- fast food- donuts/sprite/mountain dew for breakfast-- little debbies & coke before the gym UGH!!!  He worries about my eating--

i went through borderline ED crap on here counting calories with this stuff- i have not really lost too much scale weight - i have lost FAT - 8-10% -- and still have 4-5% left that i want to lose- i eat a VERY HIGH protein diet with no carbs except from oats/veg/fruits-- nothing white (no rice, potatoes, sugar, etc) he thinks I am crazy that I open a can of tuna fish leaving the gym and gulp it down-- or that I won't eat fruit after 12PM or that I won't eat crap at all really- except at TTOM-- then I make applesauce brownies-- lol...

eh, he is VERY jealous of other people's advice to me at the gym - i.e., new trainer I got that just kicks my @ss with  "functional circuit training" workouts at the navy base gym-- mmmm it's hard, hot, heavy and so challenging it was like at the very end-- it felt better than sex! LOL-- needless to say- WRONG analogy to tell dear husband...

ah well- he loves me, loves my muscles, thinks i'm hot and the fact that I weigh the same as six months ago but am a muscled chick really floats his boat!!!

I would say that my fiance is encouraging. He does drive me crazy with his eating sometimes, though, because we both have the same favorite junk food (Tings) and every so often he's like 'ooh... let's get some tings!"

I've been trying to brainwash him in to eating and I think it's working!

my husband is sad because he does not have an eating buddy any more. he supports my eating better and evrything else he just doesnt getexcited or do jumping jacks when i lose like i want himto. but hes already  admitted that hes just scared i will leave him when i get skinny. which is silly because i was skinny when i met him im just losing the weight i gained from having our son. but good news i just got himstarted going to the gymwith me. its great for opur relaqtionship finally something we can do together!!!

So far my boyfriend has been really supportive, maybe because he knows that he has a lot to do with the weight I gained in the first place.  But he joined the gym with me and goes with me 5-6 times a week.  He's a chef who loves cooking heavy/fattening things (he seems to add heavy cream to everything), but he let me take control of our dinner menu.  And when he sees me getting frustrated in the kitchen trying to cut all the veggies for dinner he comes and shows me a few tricks with the knife to make it go faster.  He has introduced me to the public market in our area, now I can't wait for summer and the farmer's stands.  But his weakness is chips and ice cream, which happen to be mine.  He won't budge on the chips but he doesn't complain about the low/no fat ice cream.

I don't know if mine is or not. I met him while counting, so he's kinda accepted me as I am. I've binged infront of him, I've cried about it infront of him. I talk to him about it ALL day. Every pound gained, and every lost. I've had to ask him to take food away from me before, and he will. He's really quiet in the way I see he cares. He sorta just lets me do my thing without speaking a word about it. He says it's just a part of me, and I just do what I do :)

He is a yo-yo man.  I belong to a diet support group and we weigh in everyweek.  If I am down he is all happy and supportive and if I am up he is well you know what you have been doing and need to do to get back.

Now my February appointment showed that I lost 37 lbs since July.  That was a big WOW!  I guess I see you everyday and didn't notice.  Half of it is my fault because I didn't purchase clothes.  I was wearing baggy clothes. He was the first one to tell me to go out shopping.  My thought was my shopping spree can happen in my basement.  I have all kinds of assorted sizes down there still in fashion.  But I did buy 3 bermuda shorts and they were two sizes smaller.

So in the long run of things, I can say he is supportive just was unaware of how far I have come.  I no longer get those comments. 

Yeah, my boyfriend encourages me to exercise and eat healthy. He says as long as I'm not starving myself, he doesn't have a problem that I carefully watch what I eat and count calories. The 1-2 hours that I'm at the gym every day gives him an excuse to go for a run, or something else that's productive.

My boyfriend's not really supportive or not.   He doesn't particular care one way or another it seems.  I do think he wants me to lose it, but he doesn't like the foods I decide to buy.  Like if we were to get pizza, it would need to be thin crust and I could only eat a small amount and he would take the rest.  He hates thin crust pizzas.  And health bars.

just thought of this-

he says when i lose my @ss, I'll haul @ss!

Yes!  He encourages me daily and is always looking out for reduced calorie or ff products/recipes to help me.  He is very thoughtful, and pays attention to what I am ordering.  He also recently decided to eat healthier and lose weight too.

My husband  THINKS he is being encouraging but he is actually doing the opposite for me! He'll tell me things like "I miss when you were skinny". In his eyes he thinks that will motivate me to lose weight.  To me it says he only loves me for how I look! I tried explaining  this to him and he's gotten a little better.  He's never had a weight problem, never given birth, etc. If only the men in our lives could trade places with us for just a day! They would have a whole new appreciation for what we go through to try to improve ourselves. Maybe then they would know the right way to encourage us......