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I'm sure others can relate and share in this problem, I am such a group eater! I feel comfortable eating bad around other people who are, even though I know I shouldn't. I feel like my eating habits have gotten significantly worse since I have been living with my boyfriend. He can eat whatever he wants and is thin and in shape, it drives me crazy! I used to be a pretty health conscious eater and made relatively healthy dinners, especially living with my old female roommate. However now I find myself indulging in all the foods he loves and cooking fattening home cooked meals. I think also it is the comfort of being in love that makes me just not really care, but something needs to change! Does anyone else find this happening to them? Are your eating habits influenced by those around you? And how do you stay on track?
Yep, yep, and more yep. I am still struggling to find a track, much less stay on it! I am so naive about health and nutrition. My boyfriend and I don't live together but he is probably 10 pounds less than I am and he can eat 10x more than me without worrying about anything. When he comes to visit, I just want to lay around the house and eat yummy fast food with him - pizza, burgers, onion rings, mmmm. He says I look good and I shouldn't worry, and I know he's not lying, but he doesn't realize if I don't worry, I won't look good anymore!
Katlyn,
I totally understand how you must be feeling. My husband is one of those skinny bastards who can eat whatever they want and not gain a pound! LOL Eating the way you are in groups is easy because just like drinking, it's socially acceptable. You want to fit in with everyone else. Well consider this, why not try STANDING OUT by being that one person that orders and water instead of soda or eats a salad instead of a cheeseburger?! Maybe that will make you feel better. Maybe others will look up to you because of that?!
As far as your boyfriend, if this is something that's really bothering you, maybe you can sit down with him and talk to him about it. Tell him how you're feeling and what you want to accomplish and how you're going to do it?! Maybe if you have his support, you'll be able to stay on track better for fear of letting him down (if you can't do it for yourself, do it for him). Or maybe, just him knowing what you're trying to accomplish will limit the amount of unhealthy food in the house. I definitely feel like it will be easier to have his support or someone else on your side rooting for you! What do you think?
Katlyn,
I'm the same way! It's definitely SO much tougher to stay on track when the people (person) you're living with doesn't eat the same way you do.
I think all you need is to make a conscious effort to change your eating habits and don't give in to the voice that justifies bad eating (the fact that you're already aware you eat worse around other people is huge!).
I think the thing that has been helping me is to just make an eating plan and stick to it. Decide what (and how much) you want to eat and don't let yourself give in to any temptation of extra calories. The less opportunity you give yourself to fight with yourself ("Should I eat that? I want it. But I shouldn't. . ."), the more successful you'll be.
Good luck!
That is exactly what I'm going through. My boyfriend lives on fast food and soda, and I've gained over 15 lbs since we moved into together a year ago. Not good! It's awful since I live in NYC and you can get anything delivered, but you have to spend a certain amount in order for them to deliver....which means I have to get something! I've only been watching my diet for about 2 weeks, but I'm putting my foot down when it comes to ordering. If he wants to eat badly then ok, but there have to be healthy options on the menu or else I'm not going to order anything. So we've been ordering from a lot of diners or the chinese-japanese restaurants so I get get sushi while he indulgences in greasy chinese.
For me, it helps to do things in moderation. I went out to a bar last night that had unlimited free Halloween candy on the table. I know I'm not going to be able to set there and not eat it the entire night, or else I'll go home and binge on something even worse. So I went in with the mindset that I could have a few pieces and that's it. I ended up only having 2 while everyone else had 10. While it's preferable to not have any, my system works for me. I'd suggest making one bad meal a week that he loves and enjoying it with him without guilt, then cooking healthy the rest of the week.
Also, have you talked to him about it? Once I told my boyfriend how I've been negatively impacted by his food choices, he felt guilty (ok, that wasn't fun), but now he tries to help me make better decisions. And I've noticed it's made him start eating better too!
Hope some of this was helpful. Good luck!
I definitely agree. My boyfriend is amazing, and I love him very much, but he likes to eat out and eat greasy. I do too, but I know I have put on about 20 pounds in the time we have been together. Part of the problem is that we go to the movies A LOT and he always gets really buttery popcorn - if you only go once every few months, this isn't so bad, when you go every other week, or even EVERY week, it gets to be a little much.
The good news is, when I told him I was doing this, he signed up too! It's really, really great to have support, especially so close! We are excited, and are starting to plan dates that involve more than just sitting - we're going to go to the YMCA together and start taking walks (though probably not in the winter).
I agree with cmelnikow - get your boyfriends involved! If they don't have weight to lose, at least make them aware. After all, they might have the metabolism of a wild animal now, but in five or ten years, those eating habits will cause all sorts of health issues.
Good luck!
It feels good to know that I am not the only one out there that has this problem! I am a totaly group eater, I gained five pounds when my parents came to visit me a couple of months ago, I ate so bad! I made healthy choices growing up, my mom called me her 'healthy child' because even though I loved sweets, I would not eat too much, saying that I didn't want to rot my own teeth. But now she visits and I am right there with her eating junk?!
The whole reason why I gained so much weight the past 3 years was because of my fiance! We met and gradually started seeing more and more of each other, and I slowly gained weight. He eats five (HUGE) meals a day, and I guess I felt weird not eating, or not eating what he does, which was junk! So, realizing our wedding is nine months away, I decided to do something about it. I just need advice to get him to eat healthier too. I ask him to go for walks, or to work out with me, but he says he doesn't feel like it. Or if I catch him eating fast food, he'll be like if I die at fifty, at least I'll be happy. How can I help him steer into the right direction? I'd like him to be healthy and live a long life with me, any advice?
Well girls I assure you its not just girls that gain the weight. I married my Wife a year ago and since then I have gained 35 pounds in this time. I know its not fair on her and I am now doing something about it. Still nice to know I am not on my own.
I'm in the same boat as the rest of you. It's hard enough to eat right when your alone add someone else eating bad foods to tempt you and its all down hill. I came home from work last night to find that my loving boyfriend had decided to cook me dinner. tater tots and chicken fingers :( He is a slim and tall guy and i am a short a thick woman. He says he loves my body and that may be true but i am not in love with my own body. We have just recently moved in together after a year of dating and over that year i have put on a wopping 20 lbs. I want to start loosing weight but i'm scared to say anything to him about our eating habits because he doesn't realise that him telling me he likes me just the way i am isn't nice it just takes away any motivation i have.
In my past relationships I found comfort in my partner.I didnt feel the loneliness that I would when I was single. And would not have the same desire to exercise and take care of my body. We found comfort in each other and also put on weight together. So I decided that we should exercise together that was the best way of losing weight and I got to spend time with my girlfriend.
I also found that if I ever ate junk food or my girlfriend ever ate junk food we would indulge in the treats together.
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