Eating disorder and weight gain.

I am recovering from an eating disorder and over the past three months since I started college I gained 5 pounds. It is more than I am comfortable with. I am at a really healthy weight but I do not feel like it is my "happy" weight and my happy weight was a healthy weight as well. What should I do? I was thinking about simply exercising more and eating more intuitively to get back to my happy weight. But for a recovering anorexic, is this wise? I am torn. I feel like ED is pulling me back, but at the same time I want to get back to the weight in which I felt like I liked myself. I am confused.

i think if you're at a healthy weight now, you should just maintain. losing any weight could trigger you and cause you to relapse. i'm sure you look fantastic as you are, but if you feel "fat", you could just do some weight-lifting and stuff to tone up.

best of luck to you, i've been recovering for a year now, so i know what a slippery slope it is.

What do you mean 'you are recovering'?  Do you have a nutritionist or a therapist?  How long have you been at a healthy weight and how did you get there?  How did you put on the 5 lbs?  

I have been seeing a therapist for the past year and a half. Some things mentally have improved a lot, some hasn't. Physically I am recovered. I have been at a healthy weight for about a year and I got there by eating enough to gain. College helped because I couldn't control all of my calorie intake. I also did weight training to put on muscle for the weight gain.

You are worth more than a number. Your value extends beyond what is put in your mouth. Your self perception has no place in the eyes of others. I truly mean it.

Having said that, anxiety and plans of action have done nothing but shove me into relapse. Its important to understand that those 5 pounds seriously dont do anything to alter your appearance, and that anything drastic is dangerous. Try and maintain for a while, see how it feels. If its still uncomfortable, I would talk to your therapist about it, as he/she probably knows what parts of your ED are lingering more than anybody on CC.