Ego-bruising comments from people who should know better
Yesterday I was talking to a friend over brunch about how I'm planning on putting those ten pounds back on by eating more and focusing on building muscle. He said "Oh no, you don't want to gain any more. You're good now, but don't get heavier. Really." Augh! He's a calorie counter who has lost 100+ lbs, and got quite the muffin top himself! You'd think he'd be more supportive of a healthy weight.
I know what you mean about people commenting on your food choices. I sliced an apple at work, put it on a plate with ground cinnamon, and microwaved it. It's really good. A colleague told me I shouldn't be eating desserts! I didn't add sugar or cream or anythng!
ser25 - remember, everyone has their own opinion of everything. if it's not your weight, it would be something else. do you get a lot of feedback about your weight? i find that the first couple of times i got a 'negative' comment, i was in shock and defensive. now it's starting to roll off my back a little more. and you're right, it's always those people who should be taking a serious look at themselves that are first to offer an opinion.
i've received a few of the 'you're losing too much weight, you need to gain some back' comments. i just got some over the holidays from family members. they're just used to seeing me one way, and have to adjust to seeing me another. i just laughed it off. i mean, the people who were saying those things about me are rail thin!
good for you that you're watching your bmi and wanting to stay within a healthy range! take his opinion for the 2 cents its worth and brush it off. and don't worry, behind him are lots of others who are waiting to tell you what they think... 
get a load of this one...I dropped to the high 120s, looked bad and everyone made it a point to tell me that....so I gained about 15 or so pounds to look helathier and actually be able to walk around without feeling like I was ready to keel over...and guess what those SAME people said to me...oh look "your gaining your weight back" (just as they had all "told me" I would have when I dropped all my weight....
my advice: ignore it, and be happy with yourself...people are just so uptight when you discuss or actually follow through with healthy eating/exercising and ESPECIALLY when you lose weight
Original Post by ser25:
I reached my goal weight in December, then got sick and lost almost ten more pounds. This puts my BMI at 19.7 (heathy range starts at 20 for my age).
Yesterday I was talking to a friend over brunch about how I'm planning on putting those ten pounds back on by eating more and focusing on building muscle. He said "Oh no, you don't want to gain any more. You're good now, but don't get heavier. Really." Augh! He's a calorie counter who has lost 100+ lbs, and got quite the muffin top himself! You'd think he'd be more supportive of a healthy weight.
Maybe he thought you looked really really good and was trying to compliment you.
There's more to life than numbers. You may not like having a BMI of 19.7, but it's not necessarily a bad thing to be just under 20. If you want to gain weight, then by all means, do so, but I think you're reading too much into your friend's comment.
Oh my god. As soon as I read that I went out and bought apples and ground cinnamon..mmmmmmmm!
Attitudes from my family seem to fluctuate. I get home at the end of term and 'woah, you've lost so much weight, don't loose anymore!' even though my mum is still about 20lbs lighter than me. Then (and this is usually on pretty healthy days when Im eating several small meals) she's like 'laura! you've already had.....'. Dad really doesn't get it. He's got this big belly and has no clue about food. He often says he's going on a diet but he doesn't know what a diet is. He usually doesn't have breakfast or lunch and just eats whatever mum cooks for dinner but before dinner's ready he starts on the crisps, nuts, chunks of cheese, and he'll eat a couple of chocolate bars after...which I guess still isn't THAT much (and he isn't fat-just got a weird sticky out belly) but he'll say the same 'wow, you look good, how did you lose that weight' then he'll say 'STOP EATING!' when I go in the fridge. If he wants to lose weight and doesn't and I did/do and did then why question me?!
And on christmas day when I was wearing all new clothes and feeling that I looked particularly good my gran starts sniping 'STOP EATING' when I get a fun size bounty out of the bowl.
GRRRR!
great thanks guys... now I have to go buy apples and cinnamon... and I did my weekly shop yesterday- Next time give me craving ideas- before I go to the market. lol!!!
That being said- people don't think before they speak. well known fact and I am still learning to cope with it. Everyone says I'm too sensitive... but it doesn't really take the hurt, frustration, confusion and tears away does it.
It's good to read that other people struggle with comments too and to feel the support of believing in "thyself"!!!
You know what? I think I will make myself that apple dish for a treat tonight.
Do you think I can bake instead - I don't own a microwave... And I have some yoghurt at home...
"Everyone says I'm too sensitive... but it doesn't really take the hurt, frustration, confusion and tears away does it." - Well said, me too!
so I am on break and met up with an old hs friend who I have not seen since last Feb. when I was at a dangerously low weight....although she was by far one of my most alarmed friends by my severe weightloss and went around telling everyone and their mother I had an eating disorder when I confided in her, guess what the first words out of her mouth were to me....oh wow you've gained weigh (I am about 16 HEALTHY pounds heavier) and am actually at a perfect BMI and stuff...I then explained to her that I had done it on purpose, but she was like "yea sure you puroposely did it" and I kept insisting it was intentional, but she went on and on...and then you know what she said? "I think you looked better the other way"....I stayed for another hour with her and left VERY angry....I guess I just can't win with her....
mind you this is someone who lost over 100 pounds herself and has minor weight fluctuations and has difficulty with binging like myself sometimes....whatever though lol
Original Post by ser25:
kiksgal - you can't eat it before noon, it's dessert! lol
not anymore! :P
Hi guys!
Thanks you sooo much- Baked Apple with cinnamon is now my favourite evening snack / dessert!
I made it for myself last night--- by the way I sprinkled a tad of ginger over the apple as well as cinnamon--- baked it in the oven for 35 min... and spooned a dollop (100 g) of plain yoghurt over the top.
It was yummy! And it got my calories up to a reasonable number!!!
I'm happy!
My aunt was there and when she saw me taking the breads she told my grand mother "Don't give her to many, she's going to get fat again."
I tried to ignore her but she has been telling me I'm fat all my life. Now that I have lost the weight she is always watching me to make sure I don't get "fat" again.
Sometimes you just can't win.
I started using Calorie Count to track my calories, activity and weight in May, I dropped from 210 to 165 by September got as low as 162 in December (I'm 6 foot and 45 years old). I have crept back up to 169 since I stopped logging...... I am going to give it till the end of the month.
I got a lot of comments, folks were speculating I was sick and really needed to start gaining weight. Most of those folks are not particularly active.... I just consider the source. I lost for my benefit, not theirs.
I enjoyed reading everyone's comments on this thread. Same thing happened to me... a close friend told me that I had really lost a lot of muscle. I have been doing exercises throughout my diet so obviously it isn't muscle that I've lost - it's FAT.
But it was a lousy thing to say & until my husband convinced me otherwise, I was afraid I looked worse now after all this effort dieting. I have lost 7 pounds and want to lose 3 more for target weight of 129 (the number on my driver's license!).
He thinks I should let his wife take me shopping so I can dress more my age. I was wearing the blue sweater in my "after" pic with black pants and high-heeled boots, and I thought I looked good. He wasn't trying to be mean, he genuinely thinks I need fashion help if I want to meet a man.
What type of food should not be eaten?
Calorie Count does not prescribe a particular diet or tell people to avoid particular foods. We only ask that you eat a balanced diet... Read more
