My Ex Is Sabotaging Me...

A very manipulative man (my first bf whom I dated throughout all my teen years) recently came back into my life. We broke up when I was 18 (half a decade ago).

We gave things another try since we've both changed so much. It turns out he's still pretty manipulative and lies too much for me to date him, but we're trying to be friends. He's good company when we're not beating the hell out of each other (a tempestuous relationship to say the least). I don't want to give up his friendship.

Anyway, my dilemma is this:

He's not a chubby-chaser but he's so insistent on feeding me. Every time we see each other he'll insist on giving me food. If we go to a restaurant, he will order a dish that I like, and then try and force me to eat it on top of my own meal.

He calls a few times a week and tells me he is on his way over with food, no matter how much I protest. He hands me food and tells me to either eat it, or throw it away (he knows I can't throw it away due to my compulsive eating issues, so he basically calls my bluff and of course I eat it).

He doesn't care about my diet. He says if he can't make me happy in a relationship, then at least he can give me pleasure through food. I am a barely-recovering binge-eater, and he just loooves to enable me. He says the content look on my face when I'm eating makes him feel like he's taking good care of me.

The thing is, I kinda like it sometimes. :(  Tonight he called and demanded he take me out for pie. I said no and we had a fight, and so he changed his mind and uninvited me for pie.

That sucked because now I was craving pie!! I binged on icecream, popsicles, and chocolate cereal just to try and calm my craving. The pie would have been far less calories in the long run.

I know there's no solution. Until I get better control of myself, or until he respects my choices without tempting me, this will keep happening. And it's such a retarded thing to end a friendship over. I guess I just wanted to vent. Ughhhh. I could scream.

And I still want the freaking pie. ;_;

Exactly lorinth. That's why I don't want to end the friendship over it. He's TRYING to be nice, right? But I have a compulsive over-eating disorder. I can't control whether or not to eat it, and I have to be very careful about what I keep in the house to avoid binges.

I was getting better, but I'm off my OCD meds now and all my compulsive actions (including eating) have gotten worse again. :(

He knows that! I beg him not to tempt me, but he does anyway. His heart may be in the right place, but it's still so frustrating!

(and yes, I'm only 5'1 with a very chubby tummy)