1,000 extra, oh no!!

I feel very upset with myself for what I did last night.  I have been eating about 1,800 calories everyday to maintain my weight after gaining a lot of weight lost from anorexia.  I am still not at a completely healthy weight.   I'm 20, 5'4" and weigh 98-100 pounds.  I'm not too sure because I haven't weighed myself for 1 or 2 months.  I also do the elliptical for 60 minutes 6 days a week, along with Pilates and ab workouts for 20-30 minutes a day.  I know I shouldn't be exercising as much, but it doesn't even seem like enough.=/  Anyway, yesterday, I had eaten all of my calories for the night, but then my brother's girlfriend came over, and we ended up eating more.  I had a brownie, which I haven't had in months and months, but it was really big, and I don't know how many calories it was, so I'm guessing maybe 700?  I also had a little frosting and a handful of chocolate chips.  I can't believe I ate all of that bad stuff.  I don't even know why I did.  I feel so guilty, and I'm freaking out because I don't know how much I overate.  I estimate 1,000 as a minimum.=(  So should I only eat 800 calories today to make up for it?  I don't know what to do.  I just don't want to gain weight from this.  Thank you so much for listening.

1000 calories extra is less than 1/3 of a pound of fat. It's incredibly unlikely that you'll gain any measurable weight and your entire post suggests that you are not recovered from your eating disorder. Plus, at 5'4 and 100 lbs, your BMI is still underweight and you should still be gaining.

If you did not have an eating disorder, I'd say cut 200 calories from your normal intake for 5 days, which would undo all of the damage.

But given your history, I think that you need to talk to your recovery team.

You won't gain any weight from having done that.  Also, it is important that you do things like that once in awhile.  You have absolutely nothing to worry about as far as gaining any weight from 700-1000 calories.  Eat healthy and don't ever be stressed out about it.

Original Post by kb77ec47:
 I am still not at a completely healthy weight.   I'm 20, 5'4" and weigh 98-100 pounds.

I also do the elliptical for 60 minutes 6 days a week, along with Pilates and ab workouts for 20-30 minutes a day.  I know I shouldn't be exercising as much, but it doesn't even seem like enough.=/  

I feel so guilty, and I'm freaking out because I don't know how much I overate. 

So should I only eat 800 calories today to make up for it?  I don't know what to do.  I just don't want to gain weight from this.  

Here are some key things that you said that should frighten you tremendously. You are clearly still in the throws of your eating disorder. you are maintaining your weight through vigorous activity, and a lot of it. you feel GUILTY over eating a brownie, and are considering RESTRICTING TO 800 CALORIES?? that's terrible. 

You should still be on a weight gain diet until you get to a healthy weight. your BMI is only 16.9...that is SEVERELY UNDERWEIGHT.

Why have you stopped gaining? please consider doing what you know you need to do...consider this one step toward recovery since you still need to gain a minimum of 10 pounds to even be in the healthy weight category...a bmi of 18.5. ideally you'll get to a bmi of 20...which is 116 pounds...you have quite a way to go and I would love to support you if you need it but please be mindful of CC guidelines and people who are actively recovering. you should speak to a doctor or your parents because you have yet to reach a healthy weight and your behaviors are really detrimental to your overall health.

I'm not here to criticize you for being under weight... Do this.... Look in the mirror;   take a deep breath, smile and tell yourself you are beautiful.  That is all.  <3

Hey, I did the exact same thing as you did last night. I was out with a friend for dinner and my dinner and dessert totalled to a little more than I usually have - around 1000 over just like you. I too am in recovery from an eating disorder, but I am now at a healthy weight. And today, I woke up hungry despite eating more than usual last night, so I had a nice big breakfast. For the rest of the day, I am going to eat as I normally do and listen to my body no matter what.

The point I'm trying to make is that I am no longer underweight, yet I still have days where I go over my usual intake - just like pilgrimdude said, this is actually important to do once in a while. You CAN indulge once in a while and nothing horrible will happen. We all have days like this. But I do not restrict the next day. That is destructive and unnecessary. I simply move on and go on with my life. If anything, you need to be eating 1000 calories over EVERYDAY, as you are underweight and highly active. It is clear by your anxiety that the eating disordered side of you is stronger than your rational side. Please, listen to Chrissy and cut down the exercise and eat to gain. Things will only get worse if you don't, trust me.

Original Post by jtrox218:

I'm not here to criticize you for being under weight... Do this.... Look in the mirror;   take a deep breath, smile and tell yourself you are beautiful.  That is all.  <3

Seconded. My heart breaks every time I see one of these threads.

Original Post by kb77ec47:

I I am still not at a completely healthy weight.   I'm 20, 5'4" and weigh 98-100 pounds. 

....  I also do the elliptical for 60 minutes 6 days a week, along with Pilates and ab workouts for 20-30 minutes a day.  I know I shouldn't be exercising as much, but it doesn't even seem like enough.=/ 

You need to go straight back to your treatment team and get some help with this.  You're malnourished, severely underweight and over-exercising.  You could end up dead, really easily.

CC can only support people in active recovery.  For that you need 2500 cals a day, every day, until your BMI tops 20....

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I am a therapist that works with eating disorders so please trust me when I say this. 

You still have irrational thoughts about your body image, weight, and exercise needs.  By focusing on the food bingeing, you are missing the bigger picture which is that you are actively anorexic now.

Please get back into therapy if you are not in therapy now.  You are focusing on fear of weight gain when your real concern should be the risk to your health.

I've worked with many anorexic/bulimic girls and women, some of which died at very young ages, so I cannot emphasize enough the risk state you are in right now.

y bmi is similar to yours im still gaining , i really think you need to go back to gaining . you are trying to maintain an unhealthy bmi your body wont like this . im not supprised you ate the cookie your working out so hard and your body is starved . i feel you are still very rapped up in the ed you need help , please rethink things . do you really want to spend the rest of yourlife with this disorder ? thinking of you h x

im batteling bulimia and used to be underweight until i started structured eating. the thing is when youre curing from any eating disorder with having underweight, you WILL gain weight, more than your set point weight (it might be interesting to look up for you waht the setpoint weight is cuz it might really help you!) right now im heavier than i used to be just from structered eating and bingeing and purging now and then. you gotto get through the weight gain once youre recovering. so please, please stay strong and it will be over  and you'll feel alot healthier sooner! trust me!

Hi,

You sent me a private message too

I have told you several times that you need to gain weight

But all you want to discus is your exercise, and how much and what type you should be doing, as well as your current injury.

The fact that you are scared to gain weight from eating too many calories, shows that you have an eating disorder.

You have not said anything that shows that you understand or believe that you have a problem or disorder.

Here is the problem…..

You SHOULD BE GAINING WEIGHT in the first place!


You are underweight. You need to gain weight.

You ate extra calories with your brother and his girlfriend.

You SHOULD be eating extra calories ANY WAY.

Yet, you freaked out after you ate extra calories, and asked all of us weather you should restrict the next day to PREVENT ANY weight gain!

This is not healthy or normal!

You do not sound like you are active in your recovery.

To gain weight, people need to eat more calories than they need.

When you ate more calories than you needed, which is what SHOULD  BE DOING IN THE FIRST PLACE,

You freaked out, and you wanted to restrict your calories the next day, to prevent weight gain.

Can you see how this is unhealthy and not normal?

Original Post by elineshanti:

im batteling bulimia and used to be underweight until i started structured eating. the thing is when youre curing from any eating disorder with having underweight, you WILL gain weight, more than your set point weight (it might be interesting to look up for you waht the setpoint weight is cuz it might really help you!) right now im heavier than i used to be just from structered eating and bingeing and purging now and then. you gotto get through the weight gain once youre recovering. so please, please stay strong and it will be over  and you'll feel alot healthier sooner! trust me!

 although it is quite possible to gain more than your pre-ED weight, it is not inevitable. Many people settle around a weight that might be lower than their pre-ED weight depending on where they started. Everyone is different.

If you were slightly underweight and became MORE UNDERWEIGHT then when you recover yes you are probably going to weigh more than you did but that's because your pre-ed weight wasnt healthy. however, if you were overweight the pendulum might not swing as far.

it really just varies from person to person and gaining above your "set point" is actually unlikely since the "set point" is the weight that your body feels most comfortable at, it is the natural weight so to speak.

Please know that I did NOT MEAN TO SOUND NASTY.

I am very worried about you

You need help, and I want you to get better.


Every one has given you GREAT ADVICE.

What worries me the MOST:  is that I do not think you ACCEPT that you have a problem

Freaking out over having 1000 extra calories is not normal - but I do not think that you believe it is not normal.