How to not fall off the wagon...?

I see a lot of posts on here where people go off their diet for a day and they feel guilty and wonder if it will ruin everything.  I know, from personal experience, that one day of bad eating doesn't destroy the entire effort to lose weight (just maybe slow it down a tad).  However, and this is from personal experience as well, if one day turns into two weeks or more, that's a problem.  I also see people always posting that we need to enjoy life eventhough we are trying to drop some weight which means having treats once in a while. 

Ok well, my problem is that very often, one day turns into weeks for me.  I'll go out on Friday, wake up feeling guilty Saturday, skip the gym, and over eat again and it goes on for a week or two.  I want to know how to prevent this!!!  It destroys all my efforts and makes me depressed.  I tried talking to myself before going out saying that one day is OK, nothing bad will happen and that I just need to get up and go to the gym the next day and just stay with the plan, but it doesn't always work.  I have this perfectionistic mentality, so getting off the plan for a day makes me uneasy and ruins my "perfect" plans, but I don't know how to get over it.  I just feel like if I just make a commitment for two months, the weight will be gone and I can go out then, but I know that I will be a miserable b**ch for those two months.  Ugh!!  Any thoughts!?!?!  Thanks. 

I totally sympathize with you there. I also have that perfectionst mentality, and getting off track for a day makes me feel like a failure and I end up going off track for weeks and regaining back all the weight I've managed to lose. It IS really frustrating, and makes me feel like a weak person...

This time around, I've told myself that this is my last serious attempt at losing weight. I've set a definite long term goal of losing the weight by my 25th birthday, and short term goals for every 2 weeks. I decided to not give myself any "free" days (bc a "free" day would turn into "free" weeks), and set a goal of working out 4 times/week. I also gave myself some leeway for potential bad days by deciding that if I overeat on a day, I'd add an extra work out day to that week.

Anyway, not to ramble on, for me what has helped the most is setting defined goals and having plans that include those expected bad days. That way, the bad days are also a part of your "perfect" plan and having one will not completely throw you off.

So far, it's helped a lot for me and I've lost ~6lb in 3 weeks :) I've had 1 bad day, which I made up for with an extra work out. hopefully this time I can see it through. Good luck!

I'm with you girls...I'm the exact same way. 

I think I've finally accepted that it's not about food.  It's about punishing myself.  If I have a "bad" meal I punish myself by turning it into a bad day, bad week, and so on.  My last "bad meal" ended up in an 8 week pigout and I gained 10lbs.

So the question for me is to dig deep and find out why I punish myself.  I'm sure it's psychological and I should get counseling/therapy but that costs money I just don't have right now. 

But I have found that since accepting that I have low self-worth, it has helped release some stress around the issue and I'm finding it a little easier to forgive myself. 

What I want to know is WHY is it SO HARD to forgive myself and when I can forgive others so easily.

Yeah, I think it really has to do with the "all or nothing, black and white" thinking.  I always think , "well I ate that on Wednesday so the rest of the week is shot and I'll start again on Monday." Come Monday though, I think that my entire plan is shot, so what does it matter, I might as well eat what I want.  I can't get over this thinking. 

I am trying to set less agressive goals.  Goals that I know I can reach even if I have a few "bad" days.  And I'm trying to look at it as this is my life, not two months in my life where I will suffer and come two months it will be over and I can eat and enjoy myself again.  When I do what I've done in the past, I get depressed, withdrawn and angry.  This makes me binge and lay around the house all day and get more depressed.  I wish there was a pill or something LOL.

It sounds like your main problem is that you feel guilty if you have a "bad" day and end up throwing in the towel. If you give yourself permission to have a few free days, you might end up feeling less guilty about it. One thing you could try is giving yourself a certain number of "free passes"--i.e. 1 free meal per week, or 3 free days every month; whatever you feel comfortable with. You could even make little passes! Then, if you have a free day, it's like you've already planned for it and given yourself permission to loosen the reigns for the day. But if you burn through all your passes in the beginning of the month, you'll have to hold yourself accountable for the rest of the month.

i am like this but trying to stop, ifi have one bad day i just write off the week to "start again on monday" but trying to tell myself there is no point because this leads to weight gain but one day will even out accross the week so just try do best i can for rest of the week.

Have you ever heard the "exercise is like brushing your teeth" thing?

If you forget to brush your teeth one night, do you throw in the towel and decide not to brush them for the rest of the month? Do you beat yourself up over it? Nope. One slip doesn't equal failure. So if your eating or exercise routine goes off track, compare it to teeth-brushing. Try not to give up for a week or a month, because if you would never do that to your teeth :)

the problem i have with going to the gym is i always feel as if i am missing something, some sort of fun or something i would rather be doing with someone...so what i do is i make sure i get up, out of the house and to the gym before anyone is up....then when you get home you know you didnt miss anything, and it makes for quicker work outs because there arent very many people at the the gym at 6:30 in the morning.....