am I that fat that I cant find a boyfriend?

Your assumption is wrong. There is definately alot of guys out there that date overweight women. I don't think they date a skinny girl that's ugly just because she is skinny. It's ok to date skinny girls, just because people prefer thin doesn't mean it's just the thin girls that get dates.

All women who want to be beautiful are

it's not all about your weight. it's mostly attitude, spoken and unspoken. maybe before you weren't that into  yourself, and guys pick up on that. maybe now you've got a huge chip on your shoulder, and guys sure as hell can pick up on that. guys--ugly, hot, thin, and fat--date ugly, thin, hot, or fat chicks all the time.

Yeah, a guy can pick up on attitude pretty quick. Have to agree with dalmalama on that one.

If it isn't your attitude, move.  If you live in a small town where everyone is really judgmental, move somewhere else where the pickings aren't so slim.  If you just hang out in a tight social circle and never meet anyone but narrow-minded skinny-focused guys, make new friends, hang out in new places, go to different bars/clubs, enrol in classes, etc.

Try to meet guys who are staying away from the TVs, as moosebreath suggested.

I checked your profile pic, you're definitely very pretty (lucky you!)  But you seem to be shyly ducking your head in the one on the right - if you're doing that a lot all the time maybe people think you're trying to hold back?  Videotape yourself one day and try to analyse your own body language.

Original Post by vegetariangeek:

 But you seem to be shyly ducking your head in the one on the right - if you're doing that a lot all the time maybe people think you're trying to hold back? 

 Videotape yourself one day and try to analyse your own body language.

 hahahahaha... it's one picture... don't judge!

And PLEASE do not take the advice of videotaping yourself... you'll be more self conscious than you are now!  that's just weird advice anyway...

I don't know ... I guess if you videotaped yourself all day it would make you self-conscious, but when I was looking for a job I did mock interviews that were recorded and I just realised I had a few weird gestures (like tipping my head to the side when I"m nervous!!) that might distract people talking to me.  Once I was aware of them I could make an effort not to do them anymore.

Not that you shouldn't just be yourself most of the time ... that was for competitive job interviews.

Just reading your topic makes me know that you're not confident.

You are beautiful and you gotta act that way! It's ALL about the way a person presents themselves.

Original Post by hmking:

 Awe, that's sweet...and posting it on a thread that's been dead for over a year makes me think bryank1977 may have a bit of a crush on the OP!!!  

I didn't even notice that the post(s) were a year old. This topic showed up in the "Hot Topics" section of the CC toolbar and I clicked on it. I suppose I should pay more attention.

I kinda know how you feel. I'm afraid to try to act flirty or sexy until I lose more weight. I can only fake confidence on stage because I have to, but not in a more intimate situation.

Not every man would like to date skinny girls.  Everyone man I have ever dated admits that they prefer a woman with a little extra padding.  My boyfriend says he likes heavier woman.  I don't consider myself heavy by any standards slight overweight, but not heavy.  I actually gained about 50 pounds within 2 years after meeting my boyfriend. He's a chef.  He'd cook all these delicious foods!  I started feeling unhealthy and ended up losing the weight. I told him to stop cooking.  I got back down to 145 with 30 minutes of bike riding 4 days per week for about 6 months.  I got sick of riding the bike and haven't done it very often since.  I'm about 160 now. I had always wanted to get back into Karate. Use to do this in my mid-20s.  I recently took up Taekwondo after 4 weeks, I may be getting my yellow belt next week. I'll have to ask my instructor if I'm ready. 

Sorry, got sidetracked, but yes I have many guys hit on me at my weight of 160 and still had guys hitting on my when I was 195.  To answer your question, guys like girls of any size who have confidence in themselves.  That's the way I see it.  Get out there. Join a club, a fitness center, go to the park. You'll find someone who likes you for you!

I think It all has to do with confidence and how you carry yourself. I always thought that I never had a boyfriend through highschool because I was overweight. And now that I have lost all that extra weight still no relationships. The one thing that has not changed is my own lack of confidence. I am naturally shy and I have a hard time making eye contact. The sad thing is  I would not even know how to tell if someone was interested. Ive talked to a few people who later told me that they always thought I looked angry because my natural expression isnt really a smile. So many of us focus on the outside and forget to fix the inside as well. Its 3 yrs later and this is just now something I am figuring out.