Fat at 113, really?

I am closing in on my goal weight and went to the Maintaining section of CC.  I was very discouraged to see posts from members that went something like this...

I'm 113 and I feel so fat.  I just want to get back to 110.

Really, you feel fat at 113?  Wow.

So here are my stats:

Height:  5'6"

SW: 226

CW:  169

GW:  156

I picked a goal weight of 156 because it is the high end of a healthy BMI.  Will you please share with me your stats and the reason that you selected your goal weight?  I would love to know that I am not crazy and that 113 is not fat!

I completely understand you feeling discouraged by posts like that.  I find them sort of tiresome as well.

That being said, I've also been there, feeling "fat" at some ridiculously low and perfectly healthy weight.  I now realize that back then I had (and sometimes still have) a very disordered view of my own body.  So, while I kind of roll my eyes at those posts, I also understand where they're coming from.

My stats:

Height: 5'1"

SW: 135

CW: 133 (was down to 122 earlier this year, but gained it all back this Fall)

GW: 120

Now, about my goal.  Because I still struggle with having a disordered view of my body, there is a very real part of me that would like to be 110.  But that's not realistic, would be impossible for me to maintain, and while it's technically in the "healthy" BMI range, I look decidedly UNhealthy at 110.  Below 115, I start to get a weird sunken-in look, my butt goes completely flat, and people start asking me if I'm sick all the time because I really do look ill at that weight.

When I got down to 122 last year, I looked great, still had my awesome booty, fit into all my clothes, and had lots of energy.  I had muscle tone but wasn't ropy, all the right curves everywhere.  I looked radiant and healthy.  So I figure that the low 120s neighborhood is the best place for me, healthwise and looks-wise.

Which is not to say that there won't still be that disordered part of my brain saying "Don't you wish you were 110, like in college?  How about 98, like in high school?  Remember that time you got sick and went down to 96?  You looked like a fashion model then...." etc.  I just have to fight that disordered part of myself.

Long story short, I think you're doing the right thing by picking a goal that you know is realistic and healthy for yourself.

im not really siding one way or the other, because obviously 113 is not fat, BUT you have to understand its all relative. everyone is entitled to "feel" however they want. someone who has never been 200 pounds is not going to be able to compare to that, and the same goes in reverse. does that make any sense? 

I know what you mean jojonannie, its just such a foreign concept to me.  I guess that because I was so large I find it strange that anyone could possibly feel fat at 113.  You are right however, everyone is entitled to feel the way they want.

5'7"

SW: 235

CW:230

GW:165

I picked 165 because it's about 20lbs above where I would like to be, so it made it more realistic for me to accomplish by October. Plus, since I have a large frame, I might be happy being only 20 lbs over my Goal weight. I know that my goal is to LOOK how I want to look not to be a certain number. I just want to fit into Lip Service clothing... -dreams- I'll look so good...

I'm 5'8"

SW: 227

CW: 184

GW1: 164
GW2: 148

My first goal weight is the top end of a healthy BMI. My second goal weight is pretty much smack dab in the middle of the healthy BMI range for my height. While I could consider going as low as 145, much lower than that would leave me, in my opinion, too thin.

Hey! I weighed 112-114, and was striving for 110-112. Now I'm at 110-112 but not happy, so I'm considering trying to get down to 108-110. I'm mostly concentrating on exercise though.

I don't think I'm fat...I just want to get in better shape. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Everyone is on here for different reasons.

No offense intended jblarghp.  Please understand that as a very large woman, it is beyond my comprehension that someone who weighs 113 could label themselves as fat.  I understand that everyone is here for different reasons and in no way meant that your weight loss goals were less important.

I've never been considered overweight, but I feel fat because of WHERE the fat is.  If I could be evenly proportioned I would be very happy at 125 to 130 lbs.  My problem is at 125 I had skinny legs, skinny arms, no butt and four big fat rolls around my middle. (Picture a can of biscuits busted open.)

It's very uncomfortable.

I always wanted to be one of those voluptuous, curvy women with full breasts, a round butt and nice full thighs.

Height: 5'4"

SW: 127

CW: 115

GW: ???

I don't LIKE being 115 lbs because I feel deprived all the time, but I don't know what else to do about my fat rolls

5'3"

SW: 207

CW:145

GW:132

I choose my goal weight more or less because it was 25 lbs less then I was when I started on CC. My SW was 3 years ago. I know my goal weight is within the range of a healthy weight for my height, albeit at the high end. I don't think being at the low end would be good for me. Both not doable and I don't think I would look that good. At present I am wearing a size 6. Something that I never thought was possible when I started to lose weight. I have no desire to be a 0.

When I was in high school I kept a journal. I would often mention my weight and how fat I was, being incredibly hard on myself, as most young girls are, but looking back at that I now know I was ok. IF only I knew then what I know now (33 yrs old). When I see things written like what you are mentioning... feeling fat at 113... it makes me think about how I felt as a young girl/woman. My wish for them is to realize that they are ok too. So really, I kind of find it sad more then discouraging.

I'm 4'11", so 113 lbs on me is a bit chubby - BMI of 22.8.

I agree with you completely.. i think its disturbing that our society has gotten to the point where 113 could even be considered fat..

but at the same time, I dont think Im above that mindset..I think that its hard for some people to accept themselves no matter what, and its sad but for some people, myself included, as you watch that number on the scale drop again and again, you begin to tell yourself to keep going and you set new goals everytime you reach what you thought would be the weight that satisfied you.

It's unfortunate, but thats how it goes sometimes. :(
I've been trying to convince myself this will be my last goal.

SW: 193

CW: 132(ish... havent weighed myself bc im trying to undo holiday damage.. since i was at my goal weight before xmas and now who knows..)

GW: 127

Morever, how big of a difference in your appearance is there between 113 and 110? I can lose 3 pounds by going to the bathroom!

People like that will never be satisfied, and are just concentrating on numbers rather than how they really look and feel.

its working with what you have and making yourself happiER with that. if someone went from 200 lbs to 113, im sure they would be thrilled. but when you have been 105-115 your whole life (hypothetical example), thats all you know, so thats all you have to work with. everyone tries to better themselves, you're not immune from that mentality just because you're not overweight.

i understand that there is a difference between "not being overweight" and being 110 pounds. (depending on height of course) but i hope you get my point.

im also only supporting this with the assumption that the 113lb person is healthy.

I understand the mindset...It's the same reason why being just 2 or 3 lbs over one's regular weight when PMS'ing or after the holidays can make that person personally feel significantly bigger, and thus insecure and even disgusted.

What I find really disappointing in these kinds of posts though (already exceedingly lightweight people expressing that they're desperate to drop a few more pounds) is the reasoning behind their strive. I've been seeing a lot of them lately, and reading reasons along the lines of wanting to feel fitter or get into better shape, etc. But when you're down into the lower side of your healthy [or perhaps even underweight] BMI range, seeing numbers on the scale go down is not going to address those goals. In fact, it may even make you LESS fit and in shape. When you've achieved the right weight, measurements and body fat percentage will help those goals come along much better than simply making numbers on the scale go down. "Fitness" is not "lightest weight possible." In fact, the numbers on the scale may even need to go UP in order to achieve that desired body.

Now, I know that every situation is different, and I am not generalizing everyone with those kinds of stats or everyone who posts those kinds of posts. However, we have been seeing it a LOT lately. It's frustrating because there are hundreds of threads with good advice, and plenty of great tools on the site---all which seem to be getting completely ignored.

There's a fair number of people who are "skinny fat", that is, they're at or even under their optimal weight but have no real muscle tone or capacity for exercise. A lot of times it can be related to people (specifically girls) chronically hypocaloric to reach some ridiculously low goal weight and end up catabolizing muscle.

So, yeah, it's real... but I'll admit my first reaction when I roll my pudgy eyeballs across the statement "I'm 113 lbs and I feel soooooo fat!" is...

... WANNA TRADE?

i get the 'wanna trade' thing but thats sort of like saying me chopping my fingers off doesnt hurt cause something worse happened to you. you know? i DON'T think it should be an obsessive thing, but i DO for the most part believe in choosing the thought 'make it better" over the thought "at least its not much worse."

HOWEVER, i will also say that a lot (not all) of those posts come from people who are asking just to hear what they want to hear,to feel better about choices theyve already cemented down.

i WAS one of those girls, and i have gained some weight, and even though it is only like 15 pounds, i already feel like "what was i complaining about back then," so i think that although not to the same extent, i am capable of understanding what you're feeling. before i initially got the point of being "one of those girls" i was  significantly more than i am currently. 

Original Post by hatamoto:

There's a fair number of people who are "skinny fat"

That's what I am! That's why I have been concentrating on exercise for the past few months. I have a really small frame though and have to be at a pretty low weight to appear toned.

I freely admit that gut reactions aren't always the politically correct or nice ones.

... but in the interests of complete honesty, I do have a similar issue. A while back I was around 235, which is 15lbs off my primary goal of 220lbs and 35 off my 'vanity weight' of 200. I was completely dissatisfied with a little bit of lovehandle action I saw when I looked in the mirror.

Fast forward about five years, and my lovehandles have turned into a love harness, complete with airbags and other assorted bits of crash padding. Now I kick myself in the ass for being so annoyed with myself back then.

Plus, I still haven't learned my lesson... I still look in the mirror and I'm completely dissatisfied. Maybe five years from now I'll be kicking myself in the ass for being so annoyed with myself today.

... and somewhere, a 400lb guy is looking at this forum and thinking "whiny bastard, I'd trade places with him in a heartbeat."

Everything's relative, it seems.

The people you describe most likely have serious self-body image problems and are possibly mentally ill, as well. I don't think people with reasonable body-images are able to understand them. I know I've given up trying to!

Original Post by jblarghp:

Original Post by hatamoto:

There's a fair number of people who are "skinny fat"

That's what I am! That's why I have been concentrating on exercise for the past few months. I have a really small frame though and have to be at a pretty low weight to appear toned.

 

If you gain muscle you will looked toned, you don't have to lose until you are bare bones.