Fat pinching and major FRUSTRATION!

I got my fat pinched again this week.  Since March 2009 trainer dude thought I was down only 2% body fat.  WOW WOW WOW!  I was PISSED!  I wanted to resort to doing meth or coke after that.  I was in tears I was so mad.  He told me to "fix my personal ****".  He looked me right in the eyes. 

I am very discouraged.  Upset.  Want to just GIVE UP!  I work so hard.  So maybe he is right...  my stress levels from my personal life are WAY HIGH....  maybe that is contributing???? 

I have been working out with this trainer for a year and a half.  I have lost 12% body fat and about 35 pounds.  I eat around 1300-1500 calories a day on average.  I exercise all the time.  3 days a week with my trainer (boxing, running, weights, calisthenics), sometimes I run or bike to my workout with him (about 2.5 or 3 miles round trip), I run on my days off from my trainer.  5'6" 183 pounds.  And he told me my body fat was 30% when he pinched my fat.  UGH!  I'm soooooo mad.  Soooooooo frustrated. 

I get so nervous about getting weighed, measured, fat pinching....  Just because I'm afraid it won't be GOOD ENOUGH for me or won't add up in my mind.  Maybe I should just stop weighing in, measuring, fat pinching all together.

You're paying this guy's salary.  If he's being an ***hole when you're busting your butt, it may be time to find a new trainer.  Losing 35 pounds and 12% body fat is AWESOME!! This is a marathon not a sprint, don't forget that.

*HUGS*

I agree.  I think you have made great progress.  However, if you aren't making the progress you want with this guy, find someone else.  You are paying him to help motivate you and help you make progress. 

Original Post by okiewoman:

I agree.  I think you have made great progress.  However, if you aren't making the progress you want with this guy, find someone else.  You are paying him to help motivate you and help you make progress. 

 Seriously.  If he's supposed to be setting your program and your goals, it seems like your successes and failures fall back on him!  Trainers should make you feel good about yourself and your journey, not worse!  You've had some great success, but I agree that it's time to ditch this guy and find someone who will be a better motivator.

You shouldn't be paying somebody to speak to you like this....so you haven't done as well as you expect, but you have done wonderfully over the last 18 months.  You need encouragement not a rude **** dishing out humilliation.  It sounds like you need to find a new trainer.  Find somebody who is supportive of your efforts, it's your money.   You are only human.

Well done on everything you have achieved so far.

First of all - you are losing weight for you, not for him. This isn't The Biggest Loser (I assume). He needs to remove his head from his ***.

Second, I don't know your age, but guessing 30, I put your stats into www.phord.com/cc and said that you are "very active" (hard exercise or sports 6-7 days/week)... you are burning 2700 calories a day! No way that 1300-1500 is enough for you!

Even if we said you were only moderately active (moderate exercise or sports 4-5 days/week), that's still burning ~2400/day. And 1300-1500 still isn't enough.

No wonder you aren't losing as much as you'd think.

Try eating more. It will probably help you with the stress levels too.

I'm with amethystgirl, you need more food and probably need more weightlifting.  My guess is that you're losing weight and muscle at the same time in equal amounts which will make your body fat percentage stay the same.  If you're exercising that much and not taking in enough protein and carbs, you're probably catabolyzing all that precious muscle.

BTW, my body fat percentage hovered around 30% for months as well.  It wasn't until I really started lifting a little more seriously and closely monitoring my nutrition and cardio that it started to move again.

I have had a variety of trainers, and I have found that having a woman train me is better for me.  I have never felt that the men understand that it is HARDER for a woman to lose weight.  We are supposed to eat less every day!  That being said, I like the more mature woment as opposed to college aged women.  Someone 35 or older I feel, understands where I am at and that my metabolism is not where it was when I was 19.  It isn't so easy being a woman! 

NOW THAT being said.. your trainer is a jerk.  He is there to MOTIVATE you not put you down.  FIRE his ass.  Get someone that works well with YOU. 

Finally, it seems like what your trainer is having you do is not getting you the results that YOU want.  Has he even changed up the routine?  Bottom line, I think you need someone new.  Remember you pay him.. You are HIS boss, if you don't like the quality of work, get someone better. 

You're not eating enough.

Hmmn, let's see: you were overweight, so you paid this guy to help you.

You then succeeded in losing a VERY impressive amount of weight.

Since we ALL know that self-esteem is tied into eating healthily, with most of us going back to over-eating when we're feeling inadequate, fat, stressed etc, what does it say to YOU that this guy is trying to make you feel - inadequate, fat, oh and stressed!!

Seriously, imo he's after prolonging his pay-cheque, think how happy he'd be if you lost heart, went on a 2 week binge, then came crawling back to him since HE helped you out before.

Call me a cynic, but look at the obvious motivation there... and consider, seriously, finding another trainer!

You know meth n coke will only keep the weight off temperarily and cost too much money and too many other health issues. That's not worth it at all!

Some trainers try to read people. Maybe he thinks you need tough love and to take a hard look at what you are putting into it. With that said, if his style is not right for you, either talk to him about it, or find someone new.

I suggest finding someone new or a new program anyway. Working for a year and a half w someone, unless you are switching it up, your body is SO USED to what it's doing that its doing it the most efficient way possible. Does he make you switch up routines? If not, you should be!

And I whole heartedly agree that you should be taking in more cals. if that scares you, just bump it up 200 cals a day at first, trying to make those protein cals if possible. Have a/an extra protein shake or something.

HANG IN THERE. You are doing this for you. If you need a break, take one, cuz being too stressed about it won't help. Then get back on the wagon and figure out what's right for you.....when I get sick of the grind, I'll try to find a new food to incorporate (I hate fish but I made tilapia for the first time last night), or buy new workout clothes or shoes to give extra motivation at the gym. Find a new routine that you are excited about.

A lot of great advice here, my only 2 comments, - don't give up...I love your passion...keep up the fight....you will win

......it does sounds a lot like where I was about 2 months ago.....

I sought out a trainer/nutritionist (1st time in my life). He made a couple of adjustments in my diet and bang I have lost 7 lbs in 7 weeks. I now eat 5 -6 times a day and he doubled the amount of protein I was intaking. So you may want to look at your protein intake, when and what times you eat, and what you eat.

Otherwise, good luck and God Bless

Original Post by stwright:

I got my fat pinched again this week.  Since March 2009 trainer dude thought I was down only 2% body fat.  WOW WOW WOW!  I was PISSED!  I wanted to resort to doing meth or coke after that.  I was in tears I was so mad.  He told me to "fix my personal ****".  He looked me right in the eyes. 

I am very discouraged.  Upset.  Want to just GIVE UP!  I work so hard.  So maybe he is right...  my stress levels from my personal life are WAY HIGH....  maybe that is contributing???? 

I have been working out with this trainer for a year and a half.  I have lost 12% body fat and about 35 pounds.  I eat around 1300-1500 calories a day on average.  I exercise all the time.  3 days a week with my trainer (boxing, running, weights, calisthenics), sometimes I run or bike to my workout with him (about 2.5 or 3 miles round trip), I run on my days off from my trainer.  5'6" 183 pounds.  And he told me my body fat was 30% when he pinched my fat.  UGH!  I'm soooooo mad.  Soooooooo frustrated. 

I get so nervous about getting weighed, measured, fat pinching....  Just because I'm afraid it won't be GOOD ENOUGH for me or won't add up in my mind.  Maybe I should just stop weighing in, measuring, fat pinching all together.

Have you ever actually done meth or coke?  If you have, then you know that's a horrible thing to resort to. If you haven't, then let me tell you....it's a horrible thing to resort to. 

Most of us are here because we are unhappy with our bodies, weight, eating habits, etc.

But I think that you losing 12% body fat is a huge success.  Slow and steady is the key, and you have done that.  Don't be so hard on yourself.

On a side note, trainers are.....well, some are good and some are bad.  They might know their way around a gym, but some of them don't know squat about real nutrition.  Maybe you shoud re-evaluate if 1300 calories is right for you.  At my best weight, I was 5'5, 27 years old, and 135lbs and even I needed at least 1400 calories to lose weight in a healthy way.  On days that I worked out, I even needed more than that.

Good luck!

Thanks for the replies everyone... The "coke/meth" thing was a joke.  I WOULDN'T do drugs and have never tried coke or meth in my life. 

Lots of good advice....  I AM concerned about taking in MORE calories than 1500....  Would be willing to add a protein shake into my day.  As far as my trainer...  He DOES switch things up and I think he was 'trying' to give me some tough love.  I didn't feel the 'love' part though. 

Dove2424:  Good point on the women trainer who is 35 or older.  I think that would be a better fit for me.

Wattydaddy:  What is the amount of protein YOU eat each day? 

Thank you, thank you, thank you everyone........  I don't feel so alone or mad anymore.  What a great group of people we have on Calorie Count.

Original Post by acretin:

I'm with amethystgirl, you need more food and probably need more weightlifting.  My guess is that you're losing weight and muscle at the same time in equal amounts which will make your body fat percentage stay the same.  If you're exercising that much and not taking in enough protein and carbs, you're probably catabolyzing all that precious muscle.

BTW, my body fat percentage hovered around 30% for months as well.  It wasn't until I really started lifting a little more seriously and closely monitoring my nutrition and cardio that it started to move again.

 OMGoodness.....  I didn't think about that:  "My guess is that you're losing weight and muscle at the same time in equal amounts which will make your body fat percentage stay the same." 

YIKES!  It's only gone down 2% in 5 or so months.  So that COULD definitely be the case. 

I will pump some iron.  I have been lifting with trainer dude, but a small percentage of the time overall.  Mostly doing boxing, stretching, cardio. 

Just ordered New Rules of Lifting Book....  :)