Fear of Human Contact

Why does this appear to be a common complex among anorexia sufferers? (I am not sure if this holds true for other eating disorders as well.) At my worst I avoided the very sight of people. Now, however, I still have this residual fear of any sort of human contact. If someone so much as tries to tap me on the shoulder, I reflexively jump away. It's not as though I personally endured any sort of physical trauma as a consequence of another person's actions, so I find it a bit unusual. Anyone else share this experience or know why it is especially prevalent among the eating disordered?

Social isolation is a common thing among anorexia suffers, not fear of human contact. Social Isolation refers to the fear of being in social situations, not the fear of human contact.  If you look at it as being on a continuum, fear of human contact is more extreme than social isolation.  Which one are you referring to?

Social isolation passes as the person becomes more comfortable around food... the isolation is more about being afraid of the food that will be involved or the change in (obsessive) routines than it is about not wanting to be with people.

Original Post by sugarshocked:

Social isolation is a common thing among anorexia suffers, not fear of human contact. Social Isolation refers to the fear of being in social situations, not the fear of human contact.  If you look at it as being on a continuum, fear of human contact is more extreme than social isolation.  Which one are you referring to?

Social isolation passes as the person becomes more comfortable around food... the isolation is more about being afraid of the food that will be involved or the change in (obsessive) routines than it is about not wanting to be with people.

I am referring to physical contact (i.e. a tap on the shoulder, a tug of the arm, etc.).

look dude. you have put quite a few posts up regarding what seem to be concerning psychological issues. you are a young guy. you need to get these things sorted. or at least talk to some real live people. much as you might abhorr them at the moment.

i think you need some help outside this site.

this comment is based on observation of a few of your posts

Original Post by fidget84:

look dude. you have put quite a few posts up regarding what seem to be concerning psychological issues. you are a young guy. you need to get these things sorted. or at least talk to some real live people. much as you might abhorr them at the moment.

i think you need some help outside this site.

this comment is based on observation of a few of your posts

Avoiding human contact does not exactly interfere with my life. I question it because some people, including myself, find it rather strange and are curious. As for other psychological issues, I am not sure that they merit the expenses associated with seeking professional help. As far as I am concerned, that is one of the biggest problems regarding mental health care: almost all conditions within that category rely on the input of the afflicted for diagnosis. Thus, I tend to wonder if I really have a problem, or if I am merely being a hypochondriac. Kind of difficult to tell when you must rely on your own, possibly-distored perspective. 

Original Post by vincent_louis:

Avoiding human contact does not exactly interfere with my life. I question it because some people, including myself, find it rather strange and are curious. As for other psychological issues, I am not sure that they merit the expenses associated with seeking professional help. As far as I am concerned, that is one of the biggest problems regarding mental health care: almost all conditions within that category rely on the input of the afflicted for diagnosis. Thus, I tend to wonder if I really have a problem, or if I am merely being a hypochondriac. Kind of difficult to tell when you must rely on your own, possibly-distored perspective. 

yikes... can't you read your post again and realize from what you've said that you should talk to someone?  If not then I'm telling you - you need to talk to someone.  Fear of human contact IS NOT a normal response. "Normal" is quote the opposite really.  Humans as a species seek out as much human contact as possible, both physical and emotional.  Look at humans compared to other mammals... we are a social species... it's human nature.  In general people don't even realize they are constantly seeking new relationships and contact with new people... it just happens because its part of out blue print. Psych 101.

EDIT:  How can fear of human contact NOT interfere with your life.  How do you function in society without having to touch people or have people touch you?

Original Post by sugarshocked:

Original Post by vincent_louis:

Avoiding human contact does not exactly interfere with my life. I question it because some people, including myself, find it rather strange and are curious. As for other psychological issues, I am not sure that they merit the expenses associated with seeking professional help. As far as I am concerned, that is one of the biggest problems regarding mental health care: almost all conditions within that category rely on the input of the afflicted for diagnosis. Thus, I tend to wonder if I really have a problem, or if I am merely being a hypochondriac. Kind of difficult to tell when you must rely on your own, possibly-distored perspective. 

 

yikes... can't you read your post again and realize from what you've said that you should talk to someone?  If not then I'm telling you - you need to talk to someone.  Fear of human contact IS NOT a normal response. "Normal" is quote the opposite really.  Humans as a species seek out as much human contact as possible, both physical and emotional.  Look at humans compared to other mammals... we are a social species... it's human nature.  In general people don't even realize they are constantly seeking new relationships and contact with new people... it just happens because its part of out blue print. Psych 101.

 

 

EDIT:  How can fear of human contact NOT interfere with your life.  How do you function in society without having to touch people or have people touch you?

I don't really go out that much. Aside from taking walks and running a few necessary errands, I really have no need to. If I happen to interact with someone, I do so verbally as opposed to physically. 

Trust me, from someone who has suffered and still struggling with fear of human contact, it will GET WORSE and DEHIBILITATING. Mine stems as far back as 13 years old when I started to refer to it as "cooties". I didn't want to be touched because so-and-so had "cooties". I knew cooties wasn't real, but as a 13 year old it was my only way of explaining it. I'm 24 now and I still struggle with HUGS FROM FAMILY.

Get help because it will only get worse.

People WILL touch you. Shake your hand, hug you, doctor's will examine you. It'll only get harder to deal with/tolerate.

Some people are touchers too. They like to touch you when they talk, it's inescapable and if it wasn't a problem for you you wouldn't have made this thread. It's a problem, and it's fixable. It has nothing to do with ED, as I've never suffered with one but it could definitely stem from it (ie social isolation can lead to fear of contact for example).

Original Post by cptbunny:

Trust me, from someone who has suffered and still struggling with fear of human contact, it will GET WORSE and DEHIBILITATING. Mine stems as far back as 13 years old when I started to refer to it as "cooties". I didn't want to be touched because so-and-so had "cooties". I knew cooties wasn't real, but as a 13 year old it was my only way of explaining it. I'm 24 now and I still struggle with HUGS FROM FAMILY.

Get help because it will only get worse.

People WILL touch you. Shake your hand, hug you, doctor's will examine you. It'll only get harder to deal with/tolerate.

Some people are touchers too. They like to touch you when they talk, it's inescapable and if it wasn't a problem for you you wouldn't have made this thread. It's a problem, and it's fixable. It has nothing to do with ED, as I've never suffered with one but it could definitely stem from it (ie social isolation can lead to fear of contact for example).

Maybe fear is too strong a word then. Perhaps "strongly dislike" is a better way to describe how I feel about it. I am not afraid that other people are contaminated or anything. I just seem to have inadvertently adopted a bizarre reaction to physical contact. I can interact with people if I so choose, but being an introvert makes time spent alone more valuable to me than time spent with others. Is there a name for your condition? 

Original Post by vincent_louis:

Original Post by cptbunny:

Trust me, from someone who has suffered and still struggling with fear of human contact, it will GET WORSE and DEHIBILITATING. Mine stems as far back as 13 years old when I started to refer to it as "cooties". I didn't want to be touched because so-and-so had "cooties". I knew cooties wasn't real, but as a 13 year old it was my only way of explaining it. I'm 24 now and I still struggle with HUGS FROM FAMILY.

Get help because it will only get worse.

People WILL touch you. Shake your hand, hug you, doctor's will examine you. It'll only get harder to deal with/tolerate.

Some people are touchers too. They like to touch you when they talk, it's inescapable and if it wasn't a problem for you you wouldn't have made this thread. It's a problem, and it's fixable. It has nothing to do with ED, as I've never suffered with one but it could definitely stem from it (ie social isolation can lead to fear of contact for example).

Maybe fear is too strong a word then. Perhaps "strongly dislike" is a better way to describe how I feel about it. I am not afraid that other people are contaminated or anything. I just seem to have inadvertently adopted a bizarre reaction to physical contact. I can interact with people if I so choose, but being an introvert makes time spent alone more valuable to me than time spent with others. Is there a name for your condition? 

I have social anxiety disorder.  I don't think people are contaminated either, lol. I just prefer not to be touched. I'm also an introvert. I don't know if it's apart of SAD or it just came as a result of it, I was struggling with SAD at around 10ish years old, it got really bad when I became a teenager. I hate it, it's a struggle. I'm married and I dislike snuggles, hugs or even more intimate stuff. I just...dislike it. And I dislike that I dislike it. :/ I think it's this way because I didn't seek help for it sooner.

(((    bunny   )))

from your posts its obvious youve been through so much with your family and all that, i think its somewhat understandable.

btw, thats a not-touching-you hug, think of it more like im making a circle around you 

EDIT im very much the introvert too, this all sounds about right, but i didnt come from a very huggy family and figured that was why i used to be so anti-hug. im getting better about it.

Internet hugs are the BEST! ;D

If you ever want a relationship or family, you're going to have to deal with this.

Original Post by vincent_louis:

I don't really go out that much. Aside from taking walks and running a few necessary errands, I really have no need to. If I happen to interact with someone, I do so verbally as opposed to physically. 

I would say that not going out except to exercise & run necessary errands means that it already has impacted your life significantly, wouldn't you? 

Do you work or go to school? Go out with friends?

Original Post by sugarshocked:

Original Post by vincent_louis:

I don't really go out that much. Aside from taking walks and running a few necessary errands, I really have no need to. If I happen to interact with someone, I do so verbally as opposed to physically. 

 

I would say that not going out except to exercise & run necessary errands means that it already has impacted your life significantly, wouldn't you? 

Do you work or go to school? Go out with friends?

I switched from traditional high school to independent study because I became annoyed with the immaturity of my peers. As far as I am concerned, school is a place strictly for learning, and in turn, productivity. When that sort of objective is corrupted by an environment that is not conducive to focused academics, then there really is no sense in attending. As for going out with friends, I never really enjoyed that very much. I occasionally have someone over at the house, but there is no sense in going anywhere with any of them as they never have any money. (I would loan them some but the fact of the matter is that they would never pay me back.)

dude, have you met ibez yet?

i think you and he may be twin sons of different mothers

Original Post by vincent_louis:

Original Post by sugarshocked:

Original Post by vincent_louis:

I don't really go out that much. Aside from taking walks and running a few necessary errands, I really have no need to. If I happen to interact with someone, I do so verbally as opposed to physically. 

 

I would say that not going out except to exercise & run necessary errands means that it already has impacted your life significantly, wouldn't you? 

Do you work or go to school? Go out with friends?

I switched from traditional high school to independent study because I became annoyed with the immaturity of my peers. As far as I am concerned, school is a place strictly for learning, and in turn, productivity. When that sort of objective is corrupted by an environment that is not conducive to focused academics, then there really is no sense in attending. As for going out with friends, I never really enjoyed that very much. I occasionally have someone over at the house, but there is no sense in going anywhere with any of them as they never have any money. (I would loan them some but the fact of the matter is that they would never pay me back.)

I really have to ask this.  Are you for real... as in, does this concern actually exist?  For someone who thinks they're very smart you aren't saying things that make a whole lot of sense and have contradicted your self several times.  I'm sure you're an incredibly bright person, but the things you're saying are ridiculous.

Dealing with the immaturity of your peers is part of the education that people have to go through.  Its not a formal piece of learning, but it happens as a bi-product of the social environment within a school. Since you're missing that piece you aren't learning how to interact appropriately with people, how to resolve conflict, coping mechanisms, or how to function in society.  These things are all going to really inhibit your future (and from the sounds of it, current) ability to be happy.

Original Post by sugarshocked:

I really have to ask this.  Are you for real... as in, does this concern actually exist?  For someone who thinks they're very smart you aren't saying things that make a whole lot of sense and have contradicted your self several times.  I'm sure you're an incredibly bright person, but the things you're saying are ridiculous.

Dealing with the immaturity of your peers is part of the education that people have to go through.  Its not a formal piece of learning, but it happens as a bi-product of the social environment within a school. Since you're missing that piece you aren't learning how to interact appropriately with people, how to resolve conflict, coping mechanisms, or how to function in society.  These things are all going to really inhibit your future (and from the sounds of it, current) ability to be happy.

I don't see how I have failed to make sense. Anyway, while I am not aware of the circumstances at other schools, I know that the people at the school I attended were, for the most part, not concerned with the learning aspect of school at all. Calling them students would be too generous. I turned to independent study because I figured, if I cannot be around people focused on their academic and financial future, why be around people? Plus, participating in this program means that I have the opportunity to graduate nearly a year early, something I would very much like to take advantage of. It is not that I do not know how to interact with people, but rather, that I choose not as it is rarely a rewarding experience. As of late, what really appears to have been responsible for my unhappiness is an unnecessary fixation on time and food, obstacles which I am working to overcome, albeit slowly. 

okay... im gonna call it like i see it. you are seriously lodged up your own arse. you are. much of your probs and yes.. they are probs, are due to the amount of introspection you have going on.

if independent study was as fantastic as you make it out to be then that would be the educational system. but its not and you know why? because social interaction is part of maturation. and the fact that you dont engage in that process is extremely evident from your posts.

you should google aspergers syndrome. you certainly sound as though you have some aspects of it.

im sure you like to think you are elite in the intellectual field but your responses in this post make you seem arrogant and a bit of a know it all really - these are not characteristics of true geniuses... so maybe come down from the pedestal

If you couldn't deal with immature peers in school how will you deal with them in the work fields? Immature people are EVERYWHERE. They are unavoidable, they annoy everyone, you just deal with them and carry on.

Humans are social creatures, even introverts like myself socialize. You gotta.

I do hope you seek help though, because it sucks and will only get worse as you get older and your views change. And they WILL change.

I personally would rather curl up with a good book than deal with most of the idiots that I see in the world.  This isn't from any fear, just that I'd rather read a book about anything than make small talk with people I have nothing in common with and no desire to know.  Are you sure that your fear is really a phobia rather than a preference?

I generally don't want people I don't know touching me because I just like my personal space.  I do deal quite a bit with touching and being touched by strangers because my major hobbies are dancing and martial arts...let me tell you there are some things you will put up with for either that you would NEVER tolerate in any other circumstances.  I do know people who have reacted extremely jumpy to any degree of touch who have taken martial arts and gotten over the extreme jumpiness so perhaps exposure in an environment that you're willing to try might help.