I feel fatter.....

I've lost 12 lbs since starting my diet in early November.

I'm not sure if I'm becoming overly critical about my body, or what.

Before my weight was just something I did my best to ignore. I'd focus on attributes about myself that I was comfortable and happy with. Of course, I'd find a shirt that hid the imperfections to the best of their ability. But my weight wasn't something on my mind allll the time, as it seems to be these days.

There are rare moments when I look at myself and think "okay, yeah, I can see a difference". But most of the time lately, I find myself questioning the scale, thinking I look heavier, and just overall wanting to throw in the towel.

Has anyone else ever felt like this? Or am I seriously losing it?

Yeah, well when you get to that point what id recomend you to do is take a photo of yourself, then watch it once; when you get to watch it again 2-3 weeks later you will see it with a more different point of vew, and you will see if there is any positive change or not ;)

Often, if someone who is not fat 'feels fat' ... it's a euphemism for feeling down about themselves.   I note from your bio that you're  in some kind of competition?  2lbs a week is very rapid for someone under 160lbs.... 1 - 1.5lbs a week would be more usual   It's quite possible that in an effort to hit the target you're making yourself miserable, eating too little or your rules are too rigid.   Diet affects mood.   A poor diet will make you depressed and dissatisfied, regardless of what you weigh.   The pressure of being in a competition - where other people might be doing better than you - could be counterproductive.   So make sure, as you're losing weight, that you're going about it in a healthy way.... sufficient calories, healthy food choices, a little flexibility.... and you may feel more positive about the process.  It's always best to lose weight slowly, safely and permanently.

I can definitley relate! What I think it is, is before you ignored your body but now your on a diet, and your becoming more aware of how your body looks. That's what happened to me too, I ignored my body, but then as I dieted I became more aware of how it looked so even though it was thinner, it looked bigger to me. I hope this helps and I hope you can start to see your body as it is and not as getting larger,lol.

I completely understand what you mean. I feel the exact same way. I've lost about 15 pounds so far, and sometimes I look fatter than what I looked like to begin with. I think it's because I worry about my body so much now and what it looks like, and before I never really knew what it looked like. Well I just hope that when I slim down even more, I won't worry so much!

yeah, i think we reset our mental scales all the time.  i wish i'd kept a pair of my fattest jeans for comparison, because i know rationally that my 27 pounds and 4 sizes is a big difference, there are definitely days when i can't see it. 

I hear you. When I first started losing weight, I think I actually *did* look fatter.  Before I started I was a nice curvy shape, a little plump, and as I started to lose I just looked like a deflating balloon. The nice curve of my stomach kind of caved in up by my ribs and looked somehow saggy down by my belt. My hips, which were smooth before, started to look like lovehandles because they were shrinking slower than everything else. It wasn't so hot. It sucked because I was making progress toward my ultimate goal, but in the meantime I felt that my overall appearance was going backwards.

This is where the site really helped. I was in a (non-competitive) challenge with a bunch of encouraging people, and I just kept looking forward to our weekly weigh-ins and giving encouragement to everyone else. I focused on the positive, and before I knew it I was through the awkward intermediate stage and much happier with my new shape.

I think that the more psychological things that other people have brought up are all totally valid, too, but maybe it's not all in your head! That's sort of a comforting thought, right? I hope so. Just keep up the good work, remember that this is a process, and soon you can ease up on your weight-centered thinking. Big hugs!

Painter.I totally have to agree with you on that.I avoided mirrors before I started my diet.I have lost about 15 pounds and I feel like there is no real difference even though I know my pants are fitting better . I just feel like I look huge plus I had taken pictures of myself on halloween and just got them developed and I look large and in charge.Its so depressing.I have stopped losing weight ,its my fault because I lost my motivation and stopped eating really healthy and counting my calories (I blame the holidays alil bit too).I haven't been exercising either because school got in the way and I have been getting over a stomach flu. Yeah I know they are excuses.I need my motivation back. I need Helpppppppp!!!

I don't think the "competition" is having a negative affect on my diet or emotional state.

I started at 169 which is a good 30 lbs heavier than where I should be for my body type. I've been at 135, 140 before. The pounds have just slowely packed on in the past 5 years or so.

As far as the competition is concerned... It's not real competitive. It's more encouraging than anything else. I am equally excited about the teacher on another team who started at 225 and is down to 205 as I am about my 12 lbs loss, and one of my teammates 6 lb loss.

The comeptition itself isn't motivating me so much as the fact that I'm on a team with encouraging people who each want the other to succeed.

Anyhow. I do agree that 2lbs a week has been rapid. I'm not sure how I've done it, other than to say that I was eating like a truck before I started. Terribly. Fast food (literally) every single day, usually for lunch and dinner. So going from that to healthy meals, and sticking to about 1400 calories is the only answer I have to how I've lost so much so quickly. I'm not sure how much longer the weight loss will continue at such a rapid pace. Probably not much longer.

I guess I am just becoming more aware of my body. Like I said, I tried to ignore it before. So I suppose it makes sense to pick up on things I otherwise would have let my eyes miss.

I just wish I could fastforward to April or May. I suppose the impatient, control freak in me is just anxious to get to where I want and should be.

The tools on here have classified me from "overweight" to "slightly overweight" with my loss. That should make me feel good. But it's difficult when my brain hasn't caught up with what I suppose everyone elses eyes are probably able to see... if that makes sense.

jelly- I'm sorry, it sucks when it feels like you are losing your motivation.Maybe you should write a list for all the reasons you want to lose weight? I find it's easy to forget why you cared so much in the first place. for me it's been really helpfull logging all my calories on this site, even when I had alot of calories for the day, because then it keeps me accountable. Don't worry though, count your loses and then get back on track. Good luck!