I feel like a failure

I've lost 36 pounds so far, since joining CC and trying to get healthy. I went from a size 22ish to a size 14, and even a size 12 in some dresses! I've lost over 20 inches on my entire body so far, by maintaining a variable 600 to 1000 calorie defecit per day, making the defecit with diet AND exercise: cardio, resistance, flexibility.

I skipped my workout the last two days and ate 2200 calories yesterday: 110 calories over maintenance, and a lot of sitting around. I don't know if I'm getting depressed or getting in a funk or what but I need someone to kick me in the ass and tell me I'm worth it.

Please help.

Geez, congrats to the weight loss! I've lost about the same and wish that my sizes would have dropped as greatly as yours! I'm still in 16 and started at a 20. (SW 229, currently 190) Anyway, I too have been in a funk the last week and a half. A couple pounds have crept back on. Yikes. I'm trying to get back on the wagon with this. I signed up to do the Biggest Loser 11 on here---a friendly competetion always motivates. Maybe you should look into that. I have fallen off before and got back on, after a bad eating day or weekend. This is the longest I've stood still with it since I started. I don't like that feeling. I'm not done yet! Here I am at the computer and I want to munch. Ugh, stick with it girl---I have to go outside and do yardwork....that'll get my mind off of senseless eating.

Here's the link to sign up for that challenge: I think it will give you a fresh breeze of motivation---lose to win---you can do it!

http://caloriecount.about.com/biggest-loser-p art-sign-ups-open-ft137127#3 

After all that progress you deserve to take a few days off, and eating only 110 calories over maintenance will not set you back at all!!!!

You are worth it! If you are feeling burnt out, it is okay to take a break, eat at maintenance for a week or even two. Give your body a break from dieting, who knows it might even recharge your metabolism.

If you don't feel like going to the gym, take a nice long walk. I find that I feel better if I am active but you can be active without formal exercise.

Congratualtions on your loss so far, you are doing great!

Original Post by findingmeagain2009:

Geez, congrats to the weight loss! I've lost about the same and wish that my sizes would have dropped as greatly as yours! I'm still in 16 and started at a 20. (SW 229, currently 190) Anyway, I too have been in a funk the last week and a half. A couple pounds have crept back on. Yikes. I'm trying to get back on the wagon with this. I signed up to do the Biggest Loser 11 on here---a friendly competetion always motivates. Maybe you should look into that. I have fallen off before and got back on, after a bad eating day or weekend. This is the longest I've stood still with it since I started. I don't like that feeling. I'm not done yet! Here I am at the computer and I want to munch. Ugh, stick with it girl---I have to go outside and do yardwork....that'll get my mind off of senseless eating.

Here's the link to sign up for that challenge: I think it will give you a fresh breeze of motivation---lose to win---you can do it!

http://caloriecount.about.com/biggest-loser-p art-sign-ups-open-ft137127#3 

 

 

 I'm not sure if this will help motivate you, but try on a dress! My pants are size 16 for the most part because my butt and hips are gigantic, but since dresses (particularly baby doll dresses and sundresses) are very loose at the waist and don't have to go around both thighs you may be able to fit nicely into a smaller size than you thought.

Are you doing your measurements? My starting weight was 247, now 211. I signed up for the competition!

I also know what you mean. I have been at this since mid January and have lost almost 40 pounds and it seems like for the last three weeks I just can't seem to get motivated to do any of my workouts.  It feels like my body is just refusing to get to 40. One week it will be 39 pounds then the next it will be only 37 pounds lost.  It is very frustrating.  Hang in there, you need to take a break every once in awhile.  Good Luck!!!!!

Awesome! I think that'll do us both good! I know I was fired up when I started BL10. I lost 14 lbs on BL10. (which is 8 weeks) It would've been more if I hadn't flaked out the last week and a half. I was down to 188!

Good point on the dresses.....I should go 'browsing' and try some on! I need a dress to wear to my sisters graduation on 5/17. That may be very encouraging. I know, me too, all butt & hips. My waistband on my pants are way too big! It's unbelievable. I have been taking measurements and there is a difference. I have been weight training too for months now so it is neat to feel muscles (for the first time in my life) even if they are under the fat! ;) I can't wait to see my six pack! Ha ha! I have been doing major crunches......so when the belly fat has been lost, my stomach will already be toned up and pretty. Haha. Now, if only something could be done with the stretch marks. Yea, never said I was going to wear a bikini. But I can't wait for size 12!

I'll see you in BL!

I think it's absolutly IMPORTANT to take time off.  You're doing so great! Don't worry about 200 measly extra calories. With how hard you've been working and will continue to work, that wont matter at all.

This week, tuesday, I was REALLY feeling out of it. I work out 5 days a week, if I don't I'll scream...totally addicting. Well, tuesday I was just so tired I made myself stay at home....I ate a little over my maintence.  yesterday, I went back to the gym and felt fine.  So no harm done...same with you.

I took a break, you took a break. Now we can move on.  don't beat yourself up about it.  Think of it this way: now that you took a break, you're more rested and can get a better workout in today or tomorrow.  You're fine. You're doing great. Give yourself a break!

This is why I (usually) adore this website! There is support from all angles, each corner of the globe :)

I know it won't seem very helpful to say "I know how you feel" or "We all have our days", but the reason these little sayings are so common are because they ring true for so many of us. Like mperic81 said, it's time to move on. You can't sit around waiting for motivation- it might not come! If we all waited until we wanted to go to the gym, until we wanted to put down the chocolate, very few of us would find any weightloss and health success.

Try going out for coffee with some friends, or watch a great film. Right now, I'm listening to the Backstreet boys- find a harmless guilty pleasure and indulge! I hope you feel better soon; of course you're worth it!

Sarah,

You are doing great! You have really made a difference. I didn't notice how long you've been dieting and exercising? Sometimes our bodies just need a little break. Two days of relaxing, in the grand scheme of things, is not going to blow up your progress.

I am just starting another intense cycle after taking 2-3 weeks off in April. During that time I didn't gain anything but I didn't lose anything either. But now, after being out of the gym and not watching everything I ate I am ready to lose some more.

So, stay focused on the long term, and every now and then reward yourself. You deserve it!

Ashton

I am going to take everyone's advice, here.

Joining BL so that I have a motivating competition.

After BL I am going to allow myself a week at maintenance, walking the dog in the park a couple times that week and making an effort to run around outside with my son more.

And additionally, instead of rewarding with food, my what will now be regular maintenance weeks (every couple months or so) will also be joined by accessory shopping! I spent 35 dollars on bad food yesterday, so from now on that 35 dollars will go to cheap earrings and necklaces.

Thanks so much everyone! This thread has done wonders for my outlook today.

hi sarahc09. you are not a failure, look how far you have come.  and by the way we are lb. twinkies as I am at 210-211 right now. far from a 14 though, I am in a size 18/20 jeans ( not the stretchy ones though- the real ones!!) I have a huge tummy and that is where all my weight concentrates when it comes on. I have lost 70 lbs  from 280 down to 210ish. I am not sure on inches, but my largest size was 30/32( since I liked my clothes loose, actual size mostly 26/28). I have not been in a 18/20 in 15 yrs so I am feeling like a new person.  I too got into a funk about late jan. and am really just now trying to work myself out of it. my weight loss stopped in sept. ( up until then I was avg. about 8-9 lbs a month for about 8 months or more) I have lost a substancial amount of inches since then, but still when the scale does not go down we get peeved don't we.  I also had back surgery last year, which was the prompt to have to get the weight off or maybe be in wheel chair or no telling what eventually. after the back surgery I was able to start exercising and ramped up the walking and pilates month after month ( starting off very slow and working up).  I had got a little lax after the new year about both my walking and pilates,still doing them, but not as faithfully. this month I joined a thread to walk 75 miles.  I did it!! I hit 75 miles one day before the end of the month yaay.  this was my motivation this month.   we  just have to find our motivation where ever we can, and realize that even if we do not meet our goals exactly is the act of working toward them that is important.   don't ever give up............     I have been trying to get to that ever illusive onderland( under 200 lbs) for 6 months-- that 10 lbs between me and it has been something else that is why I have got so aggravated. I feel like I should be there already!!!

Sarah, I always find insperation in reading others success stories.  When reading one a while ago it said something that really stuck with me, and one that I keep repeating to myself whenever I start to drag me feet or take too much time from exercising:

"There will come a day when I can no longer run.  Today is NOT that day!!!"

Find something, someone that inspires you and work with it.  Use that as your insperation.  You are worth it.  We are all worth it.  Remember at the end of the day the only person you have to answer to is YOU!

I want to be as big a failure as you are!!!!

I am in an incredibly smilar position right now, I feel like i've ruined all of the hard work i've put in recently by skipping my work out and eating a massive ammount of rubbish all day, putting me way way over my daily calory allowance.

You're not on your own, it sucks to say, but this happens sometimes. It's just best to learn from situations like this instead of ignoring it, and it happening again..

You haven't ruined everything. Take a time out and a good night sleep, and start a fresh tomorrow.

x

Hi Sarah, 

First off, congratulations on your weight loss. It truly is impressive. Since I am still venturing down the path of weight loss, from time to time, I think about what my future strategy will be upon reaching milestones and ultimately my goal weight. 

I believe you are at a pivotal moment that many arrive to and either suceed or fail. It's what has happened to so many people--they lose a ton of weight, start to feel comfortable with their body, stop worrying about their weight so much and take a few days off. A few days turn into a few weeks and a few weeks turn into a few months. At this point, things occur in life that distract you from your *past* weightloss program and you begin to forget it. One morning, you step on the scale, scared as all hell and realize that you've gained almost all of it back. Months and months of hard work lost. 

Your motivation should stem from this moment. REALIZE that you are at the one of the most common crossroads of dieting success and failure. Choose the road of success!

With that said, breaks are awesome. Of course, many of us break more often than we like to admit. It generally happens on the weekends. The best way to take a break is to PLAN your break. Decide how many days and whether you'll eat out or not. I wouldn't think about counting calories for the break (if it's relatively short.) Counting while trying to take a break may ruin the whole point of the break. 

Like another person above said, I have found success stories to be the most motivating tools. Here is a link to a success story of a blogger who went from obese to super skinny. His story is fantastic. The best part is his before and after pictures. It's amazing to see how different people look once they lose a ton of weight. It's like you're a whole new person. Crazy and exciting.

Also, start to think of all the benefits of reaching your goal level of fitness. Sometimes I actually forget about how exciting it will be when I finally beat being overweight. I tend to think about shopping in stores and being able to try anything on. I think about how great I will look every morning before I jump into the shower. I think about being at the beach and LOOKING FORWARD to taking my shirt off. 

Lastly, you look great in your profile pics! Keep it up!

Again, thanks SOOO much everyone! I got back on track yesterday and had a 1000 calorie defecit!

Did a good interval cardio workout, and some dancing, and ate 1400 calories for the day of good foods!

I can't thank you all enough for your support. Looking forward to strength training today and learning to belly dance on Sunday.

Today is NOT the day that I can't do any of this.

Hi Sarah

I don't know if this will help you, but this helped me, so here it is.

My story is that 5 years ago I lost 60 pounds and was back to a size 4-6, felt and looked great.

I met a "special someone" and he really enjoyed fine food, fine wines, and didn't exercise.  I got out of the habit of exercise and healthy food, and over the next 4 years, put it back on.

Fortunately, since I'd lost the 60 pounds in a healthy way, one in which I didn't feel deprived (well, maybe 5 times in a year I felt deprived...not too bad), even though I was disappointed to regain the weight I knew I'd lose it again when the time was right.

Last summer I broke my leg, and funny thing is, within an hour of leaving the emergency room, all I could think of was "gee, I really wish I could go to the gym and work out, but now I can't because my leg is broken."  So once I made it out of physical therapy a few months later, it was back to the gym and healthy eating, and now I'm 46 pounds lighter...still almost 20 more to go.

All that was to explain where I'm coming from before I tell you what may get rid of your guilt feelings when you overeat or don't work out ('cause we know there will be days like that.)

Since I had an extended period of time where I ate and exercised vigorously without losing much weight, I discovered that continuous dieting/exercise can make your body think it's starving, and will make your weight loss slow down.  I actually started eating more and lost more weight! 

So when I have days that I overindulge (even by a lot), I consider that part of the necessary pattern of occasional "opposite of dieting" that my body needs to continue to lose weight.  So then, instead of feeling guilty about it, I feel like I did something I NEED to do occasionally.  It makes all the difference in the world!  No guilt the next day!  No near starvation to "pay for my mistake".  No overeating the next day to comfort yourself for your perceived failure.

And here's the best part:  every time I've done this in the past 10 months (on average once or twice a month) I have continued to lose weight, so it bears out and proves my thinking on this.  It really does seem to accellerate weight loss to "blow it" every now and then.

I was on vacation a month ago and had one blow out evening where it was open bar wine tasting and about a dozen restaurants provided open appetizers.  I ate and drank all I wanted; had a blast (didn't drive, don't worry), and returned to normal eating/exercise the next day.  That was one of my best weight loss weeks ever.

Hope this helps!  Bless you and take care, and always be kind to yourself.  Don't let your self esteem be dependent on your age, weight, size or looks EVER!!!!