Femininity

I was wondering if anyone has the same 'problem' as me. Sometimes I wish I was more feminine, in the physical sense (or what's considered feminine). I've got curves in the boob and butt area but no hips, I have broad shoulders, I'm tall, medium frame and muscular body type. I just feel big (I am not that overweight, just feel like I'm big and bulky, or broad). Sometimes I wish I was petite, shorter with an hourglass figure. Except for my current bf who is 6', I have been taller than everyone else I dated (what gives? I'm 5'9, not that tall). So I have this idea in my head that the girl is supposed to be smaller than the guy, like he should be able to pick her up and carry her lol.

Maybe I am further progressing out of my tomboy self, I used to actually shop in the boys section as a pre-teen, then I progressed to nicer clothes, from the girls section :P. The last time I remember wearing a dress was 8th grade graduation, the last time I wore a skirt was at my cousin's wedding 6yrs ago. I've never worn high heels, always running shoes. Lately I've been wanting to wear more girly stuff, but I guess I figure it doesn't look good on me, or I don't feel comfortable in it (again I feel big). I hope after I lose these 20-25lbs that it'll help with all this.

Lastly I want to say that sometimes I do like how I am, I've always liked being strong and umm robust, and lots of people want to be tall...

It'd be wonderful if we could all experience sokmething different for one day. At 5'2 with an hourglass figure I cant but help but wish I was taller. I can understand where your coming from but at the same time it would be refreshing to be able to look at someone eye-to-eye rather than eye-to-chest.

All I can say is every and any size has its hang-ups you just have to get used to them and accept them because it's the body you'll have for the rest of your life.

OMG! don't worry about it at all- Now don't freak out, but I had a friend just like you... in fact, I thought you were her from the picture... no kidding... Anyways, she used to be kinda the same thing about not wearing dresses and stuff- I'm telling you once she did start dressing up, she looked like a model and she had guys checking her out all the time... I wouldn't be worried about it at ALL!!! Go for it girl!!!

Sorry wanted to add--- that she was 6 ft, but had the exact body type you are describing too.

You actually sound like my mother.  She's five nine, and very broad.  And she manages to present herself very feminine just by wearing the right clothes.  Honestly, although it might be trying, go into the women's department and just keep trying stuff on until you find stuff that flatters what you love the most.

Btw, although my mom is 5'9", she wears 3 inch heels regularly...and my dad is only 5'7"!  So flaunt what you have!  And just focus on what YOU like about YOU. 

I'm lucky, I've actually come to love the figure I'm pretty sure I'll end up with at the end of my weight loss :)

I feel you --- 5"8' and very large framed -- I hate standing next to some of my average sized friends, and the petite ones make me feel like a giant.  But, having said that -- my size allows me to carry more weight and still look halfway decent, and I have an hourglass figure (it's a big hourglass).  I love being strong, I love my broad shoulders, and I love my athletic build (just wish there was about 20lb less of it....).  It took me a long time to figure out that one thing I could not change was my frame... so I might as well embrace it

Although there are times when I wanted a relationship with someone big and brawny (to make me feel small and protected), most of the time I've been with guys similar to my size, and it works.

I don't wear dresses or skirts, but that might be the tomboy part -- but I definitely look like a "girl" when I want to.  It's all in what you pick and how you wear it. 

Know what you mean about wearing trainers and no skirts as the only time I've worn a dress in the last decade was for a ball where I definitely couldn't have got away with trousers. I think all women can look feminine when they try, its all about emphasising the right bits and smoothing over the slightly more "non-feminine" parts of your body :oP

vicereine, we sound so alike! (except for the boyfriend part... but my last one was the same height as me but thin and tiny, sigh, so that definitely didn't help in the "feeling smaller than the guy" thing).

I'm also 5'9 with an athletic body shape... and most of my friends are slender and feminine, so I often feel "big" next to them. Luckily, like coach_k said, we muscular girls can carry weight well and even though I want to lose 10 or 15 pounds, I don't look overweight. I'm cursed with the horrible apple shape, so finding jeans that fit my waist and my thighs is almost impossible (when the waist part fits, the thighs don't and vice versa). I actually wear a LOT of skirts...I have awesome legs so I get to show those off, and cover up my tummy which I'm not yet a fan of.

I also wasn't into makeup at all in high school, but now that I'm in college I've learned that a little goes a long way. I usually do my eyes up with eyeliner and mascara, and put on a little blush, and it definitely makes a difference. Plus, it's fun to feel girly... we should work it!

So sometimes I just feel big and unfeminine, but other times I'm wearing a cute skirt and catch a guy's glance and know that I'm attractive. And usually I love knowing I'm strong and healthy and vibrant. It's all up in here *taps head*. Good luck!

I remember in high school my friends said I was lucky I don't have hips, because they didn't like theirs (I thought they looked fine), so I guess sometimes what we like on one person, they would rather have what we have instead too lol.

coach_k - I was lucky that most of my friends were tall too, but when I'm in public I feel giant to some of the people out there, like I'll be standing on the subway next to some older asian or east indian ladies that are probably 5' or less. That's also why I refuse to buy boots with heels, I used to wear some that made me like 6' lol.

Well I'm planning to do some shopping after I've lost weight, I'm kinda tired of some of the clothes I have, so maybe I'll be a little more open minded about what I try on.

Eh i almost prefer a taller girl, still shorter than me... but not many girls are over 6 foot regardless lol... 

vicerine - I have a similar body type to you sounds like. I am a woman, 5'7", med to large frame, very broad shoulders for a woman, narrow hips, large chest (D to DD). I am very, very top heavy. I used to be really uncomfortable with my body. And the things that make me uncomfortable are things that will not change with weight - like having broad shoulders. Everyone always says to me, "WOW!! HOW tall are YOU?? 5'10"?? 6 feet?" I don't know why it bothers me so much. I am "only" 5'7". And although that is on the tall end for women it's not freakishly tall. My mother is 6 feet tall and she looks great!! She just ran a half marathon on Sunday morning!!

Anyway, the older I've gotten the more comfortable I've gotten with my shape and my body. For the most part clothes fit me well and I've come to learn what styles do suit and don't suit my shape. I will admit that around certain people I still feel huge at times; not fat, just like a very LARGE person. And sometimes around the opposite sex, too (which I'm sure is why I prefer larger men with very broad shoulders).

I like what marijoie said about it all being "up here" -- I think that is true. I'm a pretty confident person, now anyway, and I feel that makes me more attractive than my body type or my weight.

 I have zero hips and a tiny little heinie. I wish I had hips and a bigger butt. Thats not happening though....i feel seriously sad that i dont have those things sometimes.

It isn't all fun in the park being short and petite either! I'm both... without the hourglass figure. Just straight up and down, no boobs, no butt, no hips, no nothing! Talk about feeling unfeminine!

We've just got to learn to deal! (and no one is ever happy with what they have!)

I think it's that age-old no one likes what they've got. I've got a really small waist with sort of a big chest (it's gone down a bit) and big hips. Sometimes I wish that I was straighter or that my chest was smaller. I feel like it's out of proportion. But I'm trying to learn to love myself before I waste years picking at imperfections!