Food Addict: Is there a support group?

I believe I am addicted to food the way an alcoholic is addicted to drinking.  I think about food constantly: how I'm going to get it, how I'm going to need more, etc.  It gets in the way of my social life.  It gives me the biggest high (when I'm dieting and losing) or the biggest low (when I'm bingeing and gaining).

I have recently accepted that it will always be this way.  As much as I try to eat like "French women" who have a little bit of chocolate and then move on with their day, I'm more like Oprah, who openly admits that this is something she always will struggle with.

I have put on nearly 10 pounds in the past 2 months.  Every single day I start so motivated and determined.  I eat enough during the day, I think I'm setting myself up for a successful day.  But then something happens.  And I consume 3000 calories.

I yell at myself.  I just need to have more will power.  But maybe, it really is like an addiction, where I need something or someone bigger than myself to deal with this.

Does anyone experience something similar? Maybe we could support each other.

Oh god, that pretty much sums me up.

I am a food addict.

Good luck with everything!

Yep! (puts up her hand) Me too. It controls my whole life .... and I hate it. We should start a support group ... help each other. I've been to OA but I didn't like it very much.

 

 

 

I have two recommendations

1) OA (overeaters anonymous) it's just like AA, but for food. As mollysmummy said, not everyone likes their approach. If you don't...

2)Breaking Out of Food Jail, this book is VERY good in dealing with overeating problems. I highly recommend trying to read it and seeing if it helps you ina ny way.

I completely relate. We just feel differently about food than "normal" people do. Here's a great example.

Recently I fell off the wagon and made a big double batch of chocolate chip cookies. I ate most of them of course, and what's more, they were constantly on my mind. At no point did I stop thinking about those cookies....whereas my husband? He actually kept forgetting we had any cookies... and he forgot to take some with him to work to have with his coffee. Now I would NEVER forget about cookies. Ever. I was thinking about those cookies from the moment I woke up. I would go immediately to the cookie box and snarf down three right there, then take a stack of four or five to have in a more leisurely fashion with some coffee. I just can't control myself when those things are available. Then, even when I was suffering from terrible heartburn, I'd have more anyway because they were so damned good. My justification was super  lame:  "Oh well.. it's no worse than one of those giant muffins from Starbucks, and people have those for breakfast all the time." Brilliant reasoning there, Sherlock. :(

I hate to say it, but complete abstinence of "trigger" foods seems to be the only way to manage. If I simply don't have those things around, and eat unlimited portions of veggies and fresh fruits, plus limited portions of lean meat, eggs, and a small amount of brown basmati rice or quinoa, I can get my blood sugar under control and then I don't slip up nearly as much as when I'm eating lots of white starch or sugar.

Even just plain bread or boxes of "healthy" cereal will turn me into a binge monster. If you even start to slide, there's no way to stop from hitting bottom. Don't kid yourself and think "Oh I can buy a bag of chips or a box of cereal or a loaf of bread or a cake or a box of cookies and have a "serving." Ha! I don't think I have EVER had "a serving" of those items. 

My advice to you is to seriously sit down and make out a list of your trigger foods. For instance, I never binge on steak or meat. It's always starchy or sweet carbs, and I'm sure there's a chemical reason for that. For now, the solution is to plan ahead, never keep processed starches in the house, and avoid sugar like the plague. And if you screw up like I did with the cookies? Just own it, log it in your food journal,  try to figure out why it happened and carry on.  My cookie incident I'm sure was probably a result of my starting to eat white bread again... I allowed myself some white toast in the days prior and the desire for breads, cakes, cookies, etc just went out of control from there.

Thanks everyone!  Kankan, I'll have to check out that book. 

Jenniferger, that's very true about trigger foods.  And there seems to be some tipping point where you eat a certain amount and then you just want more and more. 

I empathized with your cookie story.  I was on a flight where i knew they would be serving cookies.  I was looking at my watch constantly wondering when they were going to serve them.  I kept peeking my head up to see if the cart was coming down the aisle.  Then I would tell myself "I'm sure it will be here in 20 minutes.  Just wait 20 minutes."  I didn't want them-- I NEEDED them. 

I can't keep processed food out of the house because I live with my mom and she is pretty cynical about my efforts since I have tried and failed so many times with sticking to only healthy foods.  But I can try to stay out of the kitchen, unless I'm eating a meal I suppose.

Me too!!!  And my husband doesn't understand it at all, this fixation with food.  How can a normal looking person think about food all the time (i am moderately overweight, but definitely not healthy), he says.  Anyway, I understand everyone that has posted here, and am actually going through this right now - thinking about twinkies and the lunch I am going to have in about an hour even though I already had a snack about 20 minutes ago...  :(:(:( I also feel like it's completely out of my control sometimes, although I did notice, like Jennifer, that complete abstinence of certain foods is better than allowing yourself a little.  However, I have never been able to stick with it for longer than a couple of weeks. 

I've always been a big eater but it wasn't until I began to count calories and such that I became obsessed. Every night I want to eat peanut butter. Or cookies. Or cake. Or chocolate. Anything. I will raid the fridge and just stuff my face. I don't restrict or purge or anything, therefore I don't understand what it is that makes me think about and want food SO much ALL the time.

 

Kankan, I struggle with that too.  Because everything I read says, "Don't restrict or you'll just overdo it."  So why am I still overdoing it if I'm not denying myself?

I have a food addiction also, it is the cause of my weight problem.  And now that I'm older, it can cause me to gain weight fast.  When I was younger, it was less of a problem.

Anyway, keeping them out of the house is best.  I bought some Slim a Bear 100 calorie ice cream bars for my "treat" everyday.  I have an easier time not bingeing on ice cream, probably because that tends to make me very sick.  Other than that, I can have success with individual serving bags as well.

I've looked for a therapist to work with with no luck.  I was in women's circle for this, but it ended and so far the new session has not started.  I go to TOPS also, which helps keep me on the wagon.  But it sucks that I can't just be normal.

So many of us! Let's stick together and keep this going. I for one really need the support and I can totally relate to what everyone has had to say. 

Plus, my life is (has) totally fallen in a heap. My husband is at his wits end re: my addiction and the effect it is having on our family. I was thinking that I'd have to go back to OA, but I really didn't want to. (My last experience was that they seemed to be saying that bingeing etc is OK ... what? ... like murdering someone is OK as long as you go to confession afterwards ??!! Yeah, right!)

Last night + today I've been doing recovery reading and quiet contemplation. I really want this thing out of my life. Sometimes I have a feeling like I'm possessed and that I need to kill the "thing" in order to get my life back. And how do I kill it? By refusing to give it the trigger foods! But it's so darn hard and addiction is so darn sneaky. Some days I can't even do 5 minutes ... let alone the "one day at a time" recovery line.

So many of us! Let's stick together and keep this going. I for one really need the support and I can totally relate to what everyone has had to say. 

Plus, my life is (has) totally fallen in a heap. My husband is at his wits end re: my addiction and the effect it is having on our family. I was thinking that I'd have to go back to OA, but I really didn't want to. (My last experience was that they seemed to be saying that bingeing etc is OK ... what? ... like murdering someone is OK as long as you go to confession afterwards ??!! Yeah, right!)

Last night + today I've been doing recovery reading and quiet contemplation. I really want this thing out of my life. Sometimes I have a feeling like I'm possessed and that I need to kill the "thing" in order to get my life back. And how do I kill it? By refusing to give it the trigger foods! But it's so darn hard and addiction is so darn sneaky. Some days I can't even do 5 minutes ... let alone the "one day at a time" recovery line.

Is it terrible that I feel better knowing I am not the only food-obssessive in the world? Everything all of you wrote resonates with me. I try to keep the "really bad" triggers out of the house. Yodels, ring dings, cake, will do me in. It will keep me up at night! So if those triggers ever make their way into my house, I get them out asap. I have been working on trying to treat myself and my body as well as I treat everyone else. I feel like I am so conscious of and sensitive to people's feelings, and very few people are similar. So I have been trying to keep it in my head that I am as valuable as those I value. I think part of the addictiveness is how fabulous it feels to put that caramel in my mouth. It will never NOT feel fabulous, that's who I am. But I can manage as best as I can, and I believe if I can keep reminding myself how worthy I am of feeling and looking good, it will help. BTW, I'm 20 pounds from where I'd like to be. Let's try and remember to treat ourselves as well as we treat others. It's a step.

I know I am addicted to food. So much of what was posted here is something that I completely relate to. For me, trigger foods usually involve cheese. I do not like sweets, but I can eat just about a block of cheese in one sitting without even thinking about it.

It is something that I have always struggled with and I feel that just as I make progress, I get dragged back down again. I would love to have some sort of "team" where we can post our struggles with this issue.

For me, I find I have a big "all or nothing" approach. I can't just let myself have a small "bad" food because that sends me down a spiral of negative eating. I find I have to abstain completely or else risk failure.

I thinnk I'm going to cry!!!  I was grocery shopping yesterday and of course I couldn't restrain myself from buying a pack of yodels, eating half of it (think 700-800 calories in one stretch) and sneaking them into the house (I hid them as soon as I brought the groceries in, so my husband wouldn't see them).  Then I ate the rest for breakfast today!!!  And I haven't been able to stop eating sweets all day.  A couple of days before that I bought a chocolate cake (also when my hubby wasn't home) and ate 3/4 of it before he caught me and threw it out :( :( :( It's not like I don't understand it's terrible for me, and I eat other food too, but I just can't stop thinking about foods and then taking action on those thoughts. 

Sometimes you can find recovery programs for addictions online. I did a quick google search for "food addiction" and got these websites. Hope it helps a little bit...

 

http://www.foodaddicts.org/

http://www.addictionrecov.org/food.htm

http://www.realizationcenter.net/fdaddct.htm

http://www.foodaddictsinrecovery.com/id9.html

http://www.foodaddiction.com/Resources.html

The last one seems to be the most helpful. I would suggest writing to some of these organizations even if they're not in your area to see if maybe they know of places in your area where you can get help or of any online recovery programs.

 

Good luck :)

 

My husband and I were talking about this subject while walking together on Labor Day. I told him about someone on CC who was looking for support for eating whatever she wanted on her birthday. She had some leftover pizza in the fridge that was calling her name. Many people wrote to tell her to enjoy her birthday and eat whatever she wanted; it's just once a year. But I said to my husband that I thought that thin people don't think this way. My husband agreed. He's always been thin.  But it's not his metabolism. He just doesn't binge or overeat. He eats when he's hungry and stops when full.

Maybe we need to think of other rewards for ourselves than food--even on our birthdays. Afterall, there are many special days every year. They really add up. And I strongly agree that trigger foods need to stay out of the house. I just can't handle having a bag of chips around. My husband doesn't care. He doesn't even miss them. Now if I don't have carrots in the house. That's a problem.

Oh those yodels! I think I dream about them! Not that we can use hormones as a reason every time, but I do find that at certain times, and those times can vary, I simply MUST gorge on those goodies. I think we should start calling them baddies! But seriously, I find my ability to resist them utterly impossible. I've started going to a chocolate shop and buying a few pieces of decadent candy and stopping everything when I eat them so I can fully focus on those pieces. Now, I'd love to be able to not eat any candy, but I am trying to be moderate because whenever I totally deprive myself, I end up gorging eventually. I want to believe that I can eat a little bit of something like chocolate. So if four pieces of luxury chocolate is what I need to live in the world, I don't think that's so bad. And I am willing to leave room in my calorie consumption so that I can eat some of those treats without going over my 1400/day. I am so glad we are in this together!

None of us are alone!

My mom is the type who can eat half a chocolate bar and leave the other half in the cabinet for a week!

I'm the type who if there is any chocolate in the house I WILL find it and I WILL eat it.

Lately its been towards night time when I just feel like I NEED something. Then I'll think of something (ice cream, or peanut butter for ex.) and I won't stop thinking about it until I eat it. Then I end up eating more than I wanted, then I'm mad at myself for caving.

But I don't restrict the next day becauseI don't want to end up in a binge-restrict cycle, but I seem to just end up in an over-eating cycle. And the awful thing is that the scale DOES show it, but how to break out of it is the question! The constant thought of food.

Kankan my mom was the same way! Finding replacements is important. I keep fudgsicles in the freezer because they're low cal, no fact, and I would never eat more than one. But they satisfy the daily need I have for a sweet. On those days that only the real thing will do, I try to get a little chocolate. Does brushing your teeth at night help to curb the desire to eat? I know what you mean about being consumed with the thought. Even resisting one time is a triumph. Just take each craving as it comes. The more times you resist, the stronger you get.

I like those York peppermint patties that come in the big containers at big box stores. They are so intensely sweet that one of them makes me feel like I've eaten something decadent. But they only have about 30 calories or something. I haven't had any around for quite awhile because I have my addiction under control right now. I'm enjoying how I feel after just losing ten pounds. It's enough of a reward at this point in time. However, the demon may rise again.