Food pushers...dundundun!!!

Hello all I have a question how do you all deal with inevitable food pusher?

I mean personally I cave under pressure and can never really formulate a reply that won't bring a certain akwardness to the room. How can I when going out with friends, family, and the like say no to someone who is constantly bugging me to eat more that I want. Or to eat soemthing when I am NOT hungry?

Yeah, those people can be a pain, and also secretly they admire you because you have self-restraint and they don't.  I know people who "push" gambling or drinking alcohol or smoking or taking illegal drugs even though someone will say "no."  Well, no DOES mean no. 

Here's a suggestion.  When someone pushes food at you or tries to get you to eat something you don't want to eat, just abruptly change the conversation--not rudely, but just keep doing that.  That person will either take the hint or is a moron and you just need to walk away.  Example"

Pusher:  Here, try this chocolate cake.  It's great.  It won't kill you to try it.

You:  So what did you think of the new "Transformer" movie?

Pusher: I said to try this cake.

You:  I think I liked it better than "The Incredible Hulk."

Etc.

Original Post by pilgrimdude:

Yeah, those people can be a pain, and also secretly they admire you because you have self-restraint and they don't.  I know people who "push" gambling or drinking alcohol or smoking or taking illegal drugs even though someone will say "no."  Well, no DOES mean no. 

Here's a suggestion.  When someone pushes food at you or tries to get you to eat something you don't want to eat, just abruptly change the conversation--not rudely, but just keep doing that.  That person will either take the hint or is a moron and you just need to walk away.  Example"

Pusher:  Here, try this chocolate cake.  It's great.  It won't kill you to try it.

You:  So what did you think of the new "Transformer" movie?

Pusher: I said to try this cake.

You:  I think I liked it better than "The Incredible Hulk."

Etc.

 Hahaha I never thought of doing that. The person might think your stupid if you do that though... I think it would be better if you changed the subject after you said no...like, ok example

Pusher: have you even eaten? Here, have this taco, it's an extra.

You: No thanks, I'm not really hungry.... Did you guys see Transformers?

Pusher: But you never ate anything. take it.

You: I said I'm not hungry... I saw in the newspaper they only gave it like 1 star. I thought it was amazing (depending on if you saw it or not)

The pusher will probably lay off after that, and if he doesn't, he will only make himself look stupid.

I know I have had problems with this myself. It's really quite hard. Some people praise you for it, and others think your a total weirdo when they really secretly admire you and are jelous because they don't have the will power... One of my friends is a total jerk about this but I just kind of ignore him. He doesn't offer me to eat anything, he just makes comments.

I tried fake eating once... I failed... So if you were thinking about that as an option don't do it. It doesn't work. lol

pilgrimdude came up with such a simple, good solution. I can't believe I never thought of it myself. Sounds highly likely to work!

You have to smile really big.  just be like "No THAN YOU very much though" **cheeese**.

good luck

Tjlo

p.s. chicken tuna calls these people crap pushers LOL

I suppose there are two kinds: 1) The well-meaning who just don't understand why someone might be limiting how much he/she eats/drinks such at a wedding reception or a family reunion.  These people are so used to seeing most people a bit (or more than a bit) on the well-rounded side that anyone who is slender seems almost unhealthy to them.  They still can be annoying and their peer pressure to get someone to break his/her diet can be tremendous.

2) Those who either resent or envy someone who has the self-restraint and will-power to take control of his/her health.  These people often need to "push" because they see someone else who is stronger, and they feel secretly intimidated by that person.  I have several times noticed people who can't stop smoking or who know they drink alcohol too much be resentful and discouraging to someone who has broken him/herself of a bad habit. But most of all I have seen people more in my age group who are, indeed, overweight and out of shape resent someone, such as me, who is counting calories and who is exercising daily. 

Be strong and be firm!  No means no means no!  Be nice if the person pushing is actually being nice about it just not understanding, but if someone refuses to take no, then if you can't just walk away, be blunt!  "I said no and please don't ask me any more."

Original Post by pilgrimdude:

I suppose there are two kinds: 1) The well-meaning who just don't understand why someone might be limiting how much he/she eats/drinks such at a wedding reception or a family reunion.  These people are so used to seeing most people a bit (or more than a bit) on the well-rounded side that anyone who is slender seems almost unhealthy to them.  They still can be annoying and their peer pressure to get someone to break his/her diet can be tremendous.

2) Those who either resent or envy someone who has the self-restraint and will-power to take control of his/her health.  These people often need to "push" because they see someone else who is stronger, and they feel secretly intimidated by that person.  I have several times noticed people who can't stop smoking or who know they drink alcohol too much be resentful and discouraging to someone who has broken him/herself of a bad habit. But most of all I have seen people more in my age group who are, indeed, overweight and out of shape resent someone, such as me, who is counting calories and who is exercising daily. 

Be strong and be firm!  No means no means no!  Be nice if the person pushing is actually being nice about it just not understanding, but if someone refuses to take no, then if you can't just walk away, be blunt!  "I said no and please don't ask me any more."

 I 100% agree. Well said. But yeah, you don't have to be a jerk to the person if the person is just being nice and wanting you to eat. But if the person is being a jerk and being stubborn just be firm

Wow everyone thanks for the super advice! I think where I always really got wrong is in offering an explanation. From now on I will say no thanks and switch the subject to talk about something else.

I have this one really bad pusher friend, she's gained over 50lbs in the past 2 years and eats like a maniac. She's always trying to get people to eat too so that they gain weight with her.

I know this sounds weird, but it seems to work like a charm for me... I tell her that I'm not dieting when secretly I am. She then thinks to herself "Oh good, not dieting = not losing weight/maybe gaining weight... well no need to make her eat." and so then she kind of lays off. I noticed this after a year of her trying to mess up my dieting. Everytime she heard that I was dieting she would try and force me to go to the most fattiest place to eat and then try and get me to eat ice cream and huge amounts of food. Eventually I noticed that when I wasn't dieting, she never tried to force me. Funny how some people will do anything to make other people suffer with them. lol Now I just pretend like I'm never dieting, it really does work. I just lie and say something like "omg, I just ate like an entire pizza, I am stuffed, no food for me."

Original Post by xlovelyx:

I have this one really bad pusher friend, she's gained over 50lbs in the past 2 years and eats like a maniac. She's always trying to get people to eat too so that they gain weight with her.

I know this sounds weird, but it seems to work like a charm for me... I tell her that I'm not dieting when secretly I am. She then thinks to herself "Oh good, not dieting = not losing weight/maybe gaining weight... well no need to make her eat." and so then she kind of lays off. I noticed this after a year of her trying to mess up my dieting. Everytime she heard that I was dieting she would try and force me to go to the most fattiest place to eat and then try and get me to eat ice cream and huge amounts of food. Eventually I noticed that when I wasn't dieting, she never tried to force me. Funny how some people will do anything to make other people suffer with them. lol Now I just pretend like I'm never dieting, it really does work. I just lie and say something like "omg, I just ate like an entire pizza, I am stuffed, no food for me."

 hahahahaha that's a choice! That actually is a really great idea I might try that! :)

But it may not work sometimes though. Like if I said to my friend when he's talking about how healthy and such a "good boy" I am, making fun of me, of course, if I said I'm not dieting he would then say, "then why aren't you eating?", or something like that...

I guess certain things only work for certain people. I think it kind of depends on their fitness level and health level. If they are fit, happy, and are healthy, they may just be worried and want you to eat. If they lazy, fat, and are just not healthy, they may want you to be more like them so they will criticise you all they can and try their hardest to make you eat. You know what I mean?

"of course, if I said I'm not dieting he would then say, "then why aren't you eating?" , or something like that..."

That's when you say "Not eating? Oh man I just ate an entire pizza before I came over, then finished off a tub of ice cream.", then be like "See, look at my protruding belly..." while you stick out your belly as far as it can go. lol It works for me, and at the same time makes them smirk like they feel good about themselves that I ate more than them. But I didn't.

I definitely over-exaggerate with certain people about what I'm eating... One of my friends always asks, what did you eat? when I say I just had breakfast or lunch or something.

common convo

friend : here, have some chips
me : oh, no thanks, I just had lunch, I'm not hungry (I probably had a turkey sandwich and a side salad)
friend : well, what did you eat? (thinking I'm lying or "dieting", when I'm just eating healthy)
me : I had a huge turkey sandwich with a salad the size of my head!

she knows I try to eat healthy, she just thinks I may eat like a bird or something.. idk...

Maybe it's just me or the way I carry myself but when I tell someone NO they usually don't ask me again.

It could be because I'm a black dude with very light hazel eyes that change color when I'm upset. Most people don't want to look me in the face much or see my face when I'm angry.