How to deal when your friends are negative towards your healthy lifestyle
So I haven't always eaten healthy foods, actually, I used to stuff my face with anything that was considered unhealthy (Krispy Kreme donuts anyone?)
Until recently when my doctor told me I should watch my sugar intake (even though I'm 5"8' 123 lbs) I wasn't being a healthy person. To my surprise, skinny or nonskinny- a good diet is still necessary!
So I started to eat completely healthy. I traded in all my bad foods for good foods but now my two best friends comment on everything I eat! I get it all the time, I'll eat an apple and they'll make comments like, "I like chocolate" or "we love food" When they make cookies and I pass one up its always, "ID never pass up a cookie" and I don't even want to start with grocery shopping. They say things like, what are you afraid of getting fat or something? Why don't you get some junk in that cart?. But really.... it's just because I pass up oh say quesadillas for something like chicken!!
I have dropped some weight (7 lbs ish, I was about 130lbs which is still skinny, to my now 123lbs in about 3 months) but I have a lot of muscle and a very small bone structure... I just don't understand why some people rag on good healthy habits and endorse bad fatty salty diets when really, they should be changing theirs too! It's not always a matter of weight, sometimes just plain health.
But if after time your friends can't adapt to your good change of diet, I'd consider how good of friends they are. Just my opinion.
This is a hard one, but obviously your friends are feeling threatened that you've changed your habits and they haven't. Are you being judgemental at all of their habits, or are they just being snarky?
If you're talking about the new healthy lifestyle, keep in mind that they may not want to be converted and don't want to hear all about it. Their comments may be their way of reminding you to "lighten up' on the commentary. OTOH, if you're just minding your business and living your life, you might want to mention that you're under doctor's orders to eat differently than before.
Unfortunately you might want to consider whether it's worth maintaining a friendship with people who don't support you and are in fact trying to sabotage your efforts. Even if they are concerned about an ED (just sayin), they don't have to be snide about their attitude.
As an aside, watch the weight loss, even though you're eating healthy. 123# is very thin for someone your size even with a small bone structure. Consider adding some healthy, more calorie dense foods like nuts, milk etc.
i think its great that you decided to get a healthier lifestyle and your friends should support you...
having said that, you should watch out. I started out wanting a completely healthy diet, and it escalated until i lost 30 lbs without thinking about it. Take it from me, its even harder to deal with unsupportive friends when you have an ED. You can eat healthily (and i dont want to sound like im preaching) but you should make sure not to loose too much weight in the process.
and i agree with what music-love says. Over the summer, I ate healthy and exercised and naturally lost 10 lbs. Then, without even knowing when, I developed an eating disorder. actually more than one. i started off with anorexia, then went through cycles of binging and restricting. I'm still suffering from it right now, but it's only today that I'm trying once again to toss that garbage mentality out the window and try try TRY my utmost best to safeguard my health. Without health, I have nothing.
But props to you for being a healthier YOU !!! =D
Well music-love, I thank you for your warning! But I have only lost 7 lbs in 3 months lol. I think a lot of the weight loss was me not drinking pop. And trust me, I still eat my indulgences. But just so you know where I'm coming from... I used to eat half a box of krispy kreme donuts on the regular. I was so skinny in hs and middle school that i wanted to gain weight so bad i ate and ate and nothing!
and eventually i just got into really bad eating habits. I have a lot of self control and im very comfortable with my body in mind and spirit! I love my body!
You should be eating more in an effort to raise your weight to a healthy level, and there is nothing inherently bad about sugar, it is just dense calories.
Your body, unless you have diabetes/other health issues, will take the sugar calories and use them the same as any other carb calories.
123 pounds and 5'8" is not healthy. I would see a second doctor for another opinion. Eat healthy, but mostly, EAT.
Perhaps your friends are simply concerned that you are not eating enough calories and are trying to be supportive and you are misunderstanding their motives?
Original Post by timmcdonald44:
As you are already underweight, losing any weight is dangerous for you. I am amazed at any doctor telling you to watch your sugar, unless you are pre-diabetic or have another health issue.
Actually, too much sugar IS bad, diabeties or no diabeties. And she said that she had been skinny naturally all her life; she can't help it. I have a friend who eats TONS and thousands of calories and food but she is a stick...and she doesn't even work out! If Kalugin loses any weight from simply eating healthier (not less food) then it's perfectly natural, and I'd say, unless a doctor tells her otherwise, that she should keep doing what she's doing.
By the way, kalugin, great job on deciding to switch to a healthier lifestyle. But like some other girls have said; be careful not to get too obsessive...it can turn into an ED. It happened to me, and I never want to have to see it happen to anyone else ever again. But anyway, as long as you're careful, you sound like you're doing a great thing for yourself! Good luck, and keep up the good work!
Original Post by timmcdonald44:
As you are already underweight, losing any weight is dangerous for you. I am amazed at any doctor telling you to watch your sugar, unless you are pre-diabetic or have another health issue.
You should be eating more in an effort to raise your weight to a healthy level, and there is nothing inherently bad about sugar, it is just dense calories.
Your body, unless you have diabetes/other health issues, will take the sugar calories and use them the same as any other carb calories.
123 pounds and 5'8" is not healthy. I would see a second doctor for another opinion. Eat healthy, but mostly, EAT.
Perhaps your friends are simply concerned that you are not eating enough calories and are trying to be supportive and you are misunderstanding their motives?
I also want to point out that I am an athlete, and I have the body of an athlete, I can easily run 5 miles without stopping and lift more weight than any of my 130lb 140lb friends. I wear a size 6 shoe and I'm tall. I have small bone structure. If you think I look like a skeletor you've been mistaken. Some people have small bones and they carry weight differently than others.
I think that it is sad that someone like me, who is perfectly normal, can write about their high sugar intake and be in a way, told they are wrong for chosing a healthier lifestyle.
This is probably the last time I will ever post on this site because it seems a bit biased and everyone is a little bit parcial to the fact that if your not overweight you shouldn't be conscious of your diet. There is an ED thread in this site, and I did not post on it.
Thanks everybody for your comments though!!
Make sure you're getting enough calories. Sugar as in doughnuts (I love Krispy Kremes when they're fresh) are fine in moderation, but you're far better off eating fruit. Nuts, avocado, regular milk, regular cheese are pretty good ways to get some of those calories in and still remain healthy.
I'd just tell the friends that you've become a health nut and if it's a problem for them, they can go hang. As long as you're not trying to convert them it should be fine.
Original Post by kalugin:
But really, I mean this whole post was me wondering if anyone elses friends rags on them for eating apples instead of pizza rolls.
Yes, I've had that happen and when it persists, I choose to cool the friendship. I don't have time for frenemies.
I'm new to calorie counting, and just like you I used to be a junk maniac. But my friends too are ragging on me a bit. We had a baking party and sure i saved some calories to try a bit of everything we baked, but before hand when there were chips out i said i didnt want any and they were all pushing me to eat some. Also, when we go out for lunch, they want to go to super unhealthy places (pizza anybody?) though they know I'm counting calories. I think its because they dont take me seriously, knowing what I used to eat. They may just think I'm only doing it for show, that I eat healthy in public and then snack at home, or else they think I'm not going to last. The other possible and very likely reason for their nagging is that they feel guilty for not being able to control themselves, and they feel bad around us because were showing them that we DO have the self control to eat better. But you know what, I was that person for a long time. I never nagged dieting friends to eat junk, at least I hope I didnt, but I did feel bad around them because I couldnt control myself. and you know what? that was good for me in the end because i decided not to feel guilty anymore, i decided to be the one who sets the example among my friends. so I say, let your friends feel guilty and bad abt themselves, maybe it will move them to join you in your healthy ways once they are ready to face the real reason why your dieting bothers them.
Good luck, I think you are doing great!
